Who goes there?
It is I, Arthur, son of Uther Pendragon, from the castle of Camelot. King of the Britons, defeater of the Saxons, Sovereign of all England!
Pull the other one!
I am, and this is my trusty servant Patsy. We have ridden the length and breadth of the land in search of knights who will join me in my court at Camelot. I must speak with your lord and master.
What? Ridden on a horse?
Yes!
You're using coconuts!
What?
You've got two empty halves of coconut and you're bangin' 'em together.
So? We have ridden since the snows of winter covered this land, through the kingdom of Mercia, through...
Where'd you get the coconuts?
We found them.
Found them? In Mercia? The coconut's tropical!
What do you mean?
Well, this is a temperate zone
The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land?
Are you suggesting coconuts migrate?
Not at all. They could be carried.
What? A swallow carrying a coconut?
King Arthur: It could grip it by the husk!
It's not a question of where he grips it! It's a simple question of weight ratios! A five ounce bird could not carry a one pound coconut.
Well, it doesn't matter. Will you go and tell your master that Arthur from the Court of Camelot is here?
Listen. In order to maintain air-speed velocity, a swallow needs to beat its wings forty-three times every second, right?
Please!
Am I right?