10 signs you might be a Taliban.
10. You refine heroin for a living, but you have a
moral objection to beer.
9. You own a $1,500 machine gun and a $5,000 rocket
launcher, but you can't afford shoes.
8. You have more wives than teeth.
7. You think vests come in two styles: bullet-proof and suicide.
6. You can't think of anyone you HAVEN'T declared
Jihad against.
5. You consider television dangerous, but routinely
carry ammunition in your robe.
4. You've never been asked, "Does this burka make my
ass look big?"
3. You were amazed to discover that cell phones have
uses other than settingoff roadside bombs.
2. A common compliment is, "I love what you've done
with your cave."
And, the NUMBER ONE SIGN you might be a member of the Taliban:
1. You wipe your bellybutton with your bare hand, but
consider bacon unclean.