You guys all missed one.
The Forum Freak
This is the guy, who for reasons only known by his psychoanalyst and God, falsely believes that anyone cares about anything he has to say. This individual usually considers himself to be the fountain and sole dispenser of common sense, intellectual knowledge, extraordinary human insight and profound wisdom. This person gauges success by how many days it takes him to go from Zinc member to Gold or Platinum. Can be identified by the lack of a dictionary or grammatical text anywhere in sight, along with a complete inability to find the 'Spell Check' button. Is patently afraid of punctuation. Constantly searches the player score data for obscure factotums and meaningless justifications, but has never heard of a 'subject' or 'topic' search in the forum archives.
Enemies: none (Very few, if anyone, pays any real attention to them. Certainly not enough to scrape up the minuscule amount of emotional energy needed to even be angry or concerned about this individual, let alone listen to them.)