For you College Football fans:
BCS DECLARES GERMANY WINNER OF WORLD WAR II
US Ranked 4th
After determining the Big-12 championship game participants the BCS
computers were put to work on other major contests and today the BCS
declared Germany to be the winner of World War II.
"Germany put together an incredible number of victories beginning with the
annexation of Austria and the Sudetenland and continuing on into
conference play with defeats of Poland, France, Norway, Sweden, Denmark,
Belgium and the Netherlands. Their only losses came against the US and
Russia; however considering their entire body of work--including an
incredibly tough Strength of Schedule--our computers deemed them worthy of
the #1 ranking."
Questioned about the #4 ranking of the United States the BCS commissioner
stated "The US only had two major victories--Japan and Germany. The
computer models, unlike humans, aren't influenced by head-to-head
contests--they consider each contest to be only a single, equally-weighted
event."
German Chancellor Adolph Hiter said "Yes, we lost to the US; but we
defeated #2 ranked France in only 6 weeks." Herr Hitler has been
criticized for seeking dramatic victories to earn 'style points' to
enhance Germany's rankings. Hitler protested "Our contest with Poland was
in doubt until the final day and the conditions in Norway were incredibly
challenging and demanded the application of additional forces."
The French ranking has also come under scrutiny. The BCS commented "
France had a single loss against Germany and following a preseason #1
ranking they only fell to #2."
Japan was ranked #3 with victories including Manchuria, Borneo and the
Philippines.
