The red dress or the black dress?

She said the "Red" dress was not "her", it represented a "wild" woman, which she certainly wasn't, the black dress represented "mourning" something, so she settled on a "Lavender" color, then she called the whole thing off and the last time I saw her, she was getting into a garbage truck with some guy who looked like he needed to be on "Ducks Unlimited" as the grand ole man!