the same thing works the other way around, no guarantee that there's life or intelligent life out there,
it would be equal, but since we dont have contact yet, no life gets an additional point and wins, at least today
Yes, that's what I was saying. You can't nearly make absolute negative statement yet, like you did above. Unless you meant strictly within that 129 LY sphere, that we're alone without a doubt..
That we're definitely the first is still less certain. It took us as long as it did to get where we are today, but that, neither, is guarantee that there's no other life or intelligent life out there. All it takes is for our physics to have missed some fundamental thing for all our assumptions about communication or what the signatures of life are, to be wrong and with them all our estimations and assessments of what we've seen about the universe from over here.
Even in a fairly anthropomorphic premise, that some other intelligence needed as long as we did to evolve to our present stage, there's still plenty of leeway for them to be thousands, tens of thousands, even hundreds of thousands of years ahead of us. What would humans from that far back in the past think of our technology or philosophies? Indistinguishable from magic in more than a few cases. What about developments centuries or thousands of years, or tens or hundreds of thousands of years further into the future? Even to us the odds are good that we'd find them alien in all but name, if we even managed to notice them - what if our universe is just one small bubble on a vast multiverse tree? What if the world's just a hologram? And so on. The only thing that matches the vertiginous scale of the universe, it so large it even has such a thing as an observable horizon, is the mind bending implications for such a thing as an ever-growing grasp of the laws of nature, forever uprooting and rewriting our "laws" of physics and allowing possibilities so vast that even our most eccentric and most holistic contemporary perspectives are barely even specs of dust in comparison.