I'll play along. 
I up my uber zeke with high hopes of catching a plane willing to do battle.  

 . What? My low 3 o'clock there is a dora gaining alt and coming up at me! 
 
 
 . I quickly roll to my left and he misses me by mere feet. 

 . Now he comes over on top and begins to initiate a rolling scissors, but instead of wasting my valuable E in a full out scissors, I drop my nose and try to descend to a lower level.... My turf.  

 . Immediately he also noses down and is directly on my six at D800 

. A deadly stream of hot lead blazes by my cockpit and I react by pulling up stiffly and rolling out to my right, nearly blacking out 

. I check where the dora is. He is still above me at D400 but is ahead of me slightly, he never tried to follow.  

 . Realizing my opprotunity, I pull up to get on his six. He then starts a snap roll and drops to about 200 feet before barely pulling out of the maneuover. He has lost me, but only for a moment. I barrel roll over and meet him again. Chopping his throttle and rolling as much as possible, the dora narrowly evades my bullets (tracers off, of course 

 ). As I also chop my throttle, the dora tries one last ditch effort to get away, he WEPS and climbs 

. I see my opprotunity as the dora streaks across my sight 

. I take the shot and a lethal spray of ammunition hits the dora's left wing, tearing off bits of aileron and flap 

 .  The dora hangs suspended for a moment. A split second later, the plane is heading back to earth and the missing wing trailing after him. All in all a good day, now to stop the rest of the horde.  

There's my positive contribution to the thread, I suppose.
I could make a story about Black Friday...  
 
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
  
 