Work conversations today (all actual discussions)...
Discussing a purchasing person in our west coast office...
Jane: "I called to see who Ling ling is..."
Me: "Ah yes, miss ringtone."
Jane: "She handles all interfacing with our Chinese Division, and Chinese suppliers."
Me: "I figured that..."
Jane: "Well, she's fluent in Chinese."
Me: "So are the two guys who made my lunch. My issue is that she doesn't know export regulations."
Jane: "Well, what did you expect?"
Me: "I expected shrimp egg roll, but instead got the pork...."
Corporate General Manager isn't feeling well...
Me: "What's the matter?"
GM: "I'm itchy everywhere, scratching until I draw blood."
Me: "Have you called a doctor?"
GM: "I have an appointment in an hour. He thinks it may be shingles, but I hope not."
Me: Shingles usually just hurt, not itch."
GM: "I'll know later."
A few hours later he returns...
Me: "What's the diagnosis, shingles or flea dip?"
GM: "He says it's not shingles."
Me: "Then flea dip it is...."
Melanie, one of our buxom secretaries, walks by and suddenly stops...
Melanie: "I have a question for you."
Me: "I have one for you first."
Melanie: "Okay, what is it?"
Me: "Why is it when your feet stop moving, your body takes two more steps?"
