and whilst this thread has everyone's attention I'd just like to say that he is in no way associated or has been associated with myself or any other member of my squadron. Some people have spread this rumour falsely for their own shame. Let this be the end of it.
Don't listen to him! We have all been living with this secret for too long and now the truth must be revealed
Midway began as a controlled experiment cooked up from the DNA leavings of lesser trolls in The Few's secret laboratory (previously responsible for such powerful devices as The Mesmotron ®, Bruv's AimBot™ and the invisible stealth fighter technology applied to SirNuke's P51).
However, unknown to his superiors, yarbles had been using the lab's master computer in the dead of night for unsavory activities, causing it to be infected by malware that played havoc with the program controlling the genetic experiment now known as Midway.
The DNA code of the experimental pilot (cobbled together from the painstakingly collected cockpit sweat of certain selected fighter jocks) became badly corrupted, causing a Code Red Level One Full Alert in The Few HQ. Alarms were shrilling, klaxons wailing and really cool red and blue lights were strobing in the hangar as Bruv rushed away from a scheduled in-between-sorties refreshment break to assess the situation, still wearing his flying goggles and leather cap and clasping his mug of tea.
When he got down to the underground bunker where the lab is located and saw the warning lights on the tank containing the classified experimental subject, Bruv naturally tried to shut it down before the situation got further out of control. He poked and prodded frantically at the controls of the bio-tank, but the manual override and late-term abortion functions had somehow been locked out by the computer virus.
In desperation Bruv tried to short out the electrical components of the bio-tank by dousing the control panel with the contents of his cup of tea. The resulting localised electrical storm and the explosion that followed it can best be imagined if you are an aficionado of super-hero comic books and movies. The powerful forces of life and creation at work in the bio-tank were accelerated and increased in potency as an unforeseen side effect of the electrical surge, and Bruv's own genetic material (in the form of gross backwash from the tea he had been drinking) became mixed with that of the experimental creature in the tank.
As the smoke cleared following the titanic explosion and Bruv slowly returned to consciousness, he saw that the bio-tank had cracked open with the force of the detonation. Warm liquid from the tank lapped around his ankles as he struggled to his feet and peered around the remains of the laboratory. There was a smoking crater in the center of the bunker where the experimental subject had been housed, and a sulfurous stink emitted from it.
Bruv approached the crater warily and, with horror in his eyes and heart, looked over the edge and down at the monstrosity lying within...
And baby Midway looked up into that heroic face, still wearing flying goggles and a leather cap, and chirped 'Dada!'
So now you know...the secret is out.
The result of that disastrous experiment was exiled without delay from The Few HQ, as all were afraid of it's dreadful potential. We gave it a Spit 8 from the hangar and tried to forget about the whole traumatic episode.
But some nightmares just don't go away...
