The mother #%&$! bleepin runway ditch line! I mean if you have even one millimeter of rubber on the grass you get a ditch.

Is this how it worked in WWII?
US Military: Well sorry Mr. Pilot sir, I regret to inform you that the US military noticed you had a tire in the grass on your last landing so we can’t count it sorry.
Mr. Pilot: But I landed the rest of my plane on the runway didn’t I?
US Military: Oh yes for sure you did.
Mr. Pilot: But I didn’t actually land you’re saying?
US Military: Yes sorry you most certainly did not. Do better next time.