Author Topic: Making Farting Sounds (Read 506 times)

AKKuya · « **on:** September 23, 2025, 05:28:44 PM »

Armpit farts are the first you learn. Then the gag fart devices are used. Now, I've found another. When I take my right stump out of my prosthetic holder, the suction from my liner emits a great farting sound.

Any other methods to produce farting sounds?

Eagler · « **Reply #1 on:** September 23, 2025, 05:55:11 PM »

Wet feet in wet flip flops..

Red beans and rice last night did it too..

Eagler

RUSH1 · « **Reply #2 on:** September 23, 2025, 06:15:54 PM »

I lost, a true fart contest, to a friend of mine back in the late 80's. Most farts in 5 minutes. I believe the final score was like 108/129. Got my arse whooped, I guess you can say. There were witnesses, but I doubt they would come on here to validate any of this story.

Bizman · « **Reply #3 on:** September 24, 2025, 01:04:25 AM »

Doing sit ups naked on bare floor.

fuzeman · « **Reply #4 on:** September 24, 2025, 04:40:18 AM »

What about those silent deadly ones?
You can simulate the quiet part pretty easily but the other part is harder.
One of the more way out there posts on here that I can remember.

thndregg · « **Reply #5 on:** September 24, 2025, 07:23:04 AM »

I'm dying over here. What is it about body function humor that gets me going..?

Thanks for the teary-eyed laughs, guys!

AKKuya · « **Reply #6 on:** September 24, 2025, 08:24:16 AM »

Quote from: Bizman on September 24, 2025, 01:04:25 AM

Doing sit ups naked on bare floor.

TMI

Shuffler · « **Reply #7 on:** September 24, 2025, 09:00:58 AM »

No matter the count, the noise, the situation... if you are good at it, it only takes one. The room is cleared, no witnesses, no one to count.

AKIron · « **Reply #8 on:** September 24, 2025, 09:07:03 AM »

Doorknob!

fuzeman · « **Reply #9 on:** September 24, 2025, 10:11:39 AM »

One trait I never thought of self-improving, my fart-ability.
I suppose dog and cat farts would be off topic.

xanax · « **Reply #10 on:** September 24, 2025, 10:51:35 AM »

Quote from: Eagler on September 23, 2025, 05:55:11 PM

Wet feet in wet flip flops..

Eagler

This one gets me a lot.

I try not to go to the grocery when it's raining.

Although......maybe it'll clear out the self-checkout.

thndregg · « **Reply #11 on:** September 24, 2025, 03:40:18 PM »

And then there's this with a bit of punctuation at the end.

Vulcan · « **Reply #12 on:** October 01, 2025, 03:48:09 PM »

I have a cpap machine for sleep apnea, it's like a fart recharger/booster. Wake up every morning with enough methane ready to go for a small town.

Eagler · « **Reply #13 on:** October 01, 2025, 03:52:01 PM »

Quote from: Vulcan on October 01, 2025, 03:48:09 PM

I have a cpap machine for sleep apnea, it's like a fart recharger/booster. Wake up every morning with enough methane ready to go for a small town.

Nothing beats the gas after a good colonoscopy...made for a hilarious recovery room experience the couple of times I have had one...

Eagler

Shuffler · « **Reply #14 on:** October 01, 2025, 04:49:48 PM »

Quote from: Eagler on October 01, 2025, 03:52:01 PM

Nothing beats the gas after a good colonoscopy...made for a hilarious recovery room experience the couple of times I have had one...

Eagler

Excuse me nurse, can you pull that handle?

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