Dear Mr. Diego Maradonna,
In light of the recent Argentinian World Cup performance, we regret to inform you of the need for a rather urgent visit to your local proctologist. It would seem you have what appears to be a 'Hand of God' firmly wedged in your small intestine. How it could have gotten there is anyone's guess, but you have been riding that little piece of infamy for all it's worth, for quite some time.
The operation to remove the offending article is quite painless, but since you are the type to blub at the slightest provocation, we recommend lying back and thinking of England.
You cocaine snorting, rule bending, overweight, cheating bastard.
Our most kind Regards,
The entire populace of England
PS. Bwhahahahahahahahahahahahaha
