Author Topic: EU moves to change official language  (Read 437 times)

Offline Mister Fork

  • AvA Staff Member
  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 7294
EU moves to change official language
« on: October 07, 2002, 03:41:25 PM »
The European Union Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English will be the official language of the European Union rather than German, which was the other possibility. As part of the negotiations, the EU council conceded that English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a 5-year phase-in plan that would become known as "Euro-English". In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in favour of "k". This should klear up konfusion, and keyboards kan have one less letter.There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year when the troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like fotograf 20% shorter.In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be expekted to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. Governments will enkourage the removal of double letters which have always ben a deterent to akurate speling.Also, al wil agre that the horibl mes of the silent "e" in the languag is disgrasful and it should go away.By the 4th yer peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing "th" with "z" and "w" with "v".During ze fifz yer, ze unesesary "o" kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and after ziz fifz yer, ve vil hav a reil sensibl riten styl.Zer vil be no mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi tu understand ech oza.Ze drem of a united urop vil finali kum tru.Zen ve vil rul ze vorld!!! If zis mad you smil, pleas pas on to oza pepl.

:D
"Games are meant to be fun and fair but fighting a war is neither." - HiTech

Offline Octavius

  • Skinner Team
  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 6651
EU moves to change official language
« Reply #1 on: October 07, 2002, 06:12:22 PM »
LOL!!! :D

zis iz a klasik!
octavius
Fat Drunk BasTards (forum)

"bastard coated bastards with bastard filling?  delicious!"
Guest of the ++Blue Knights++[/size]

Offline Monk

  • Silver Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1823
EU moves to change official language
« Reply #2 on: October 08, 2002, 01:51:43 AM »
Jawohl!!

Offline beet1e

  • Persona Non Grata
  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 7848
EU moves to change official language
« Reply #3 on: October 08, 2002, 01:57:20 AM »
Old, but still good!  The old ones are the best.

Incidentally, when the national language was chosen for America, it was a very close run thing between English and German.