A man from Tasmania buys several sheep, hoping to breed them for wool. After
several weeks, he notices that none of the sheep are getting pregnant,and
calls a vet for help. The vet tells him that he should try artificial
insemination. The farmer doesn't have the slightest idea what this means but,
not wanting to display his ignorance, only asks the vet how he will know
when the sheep are pregnant. The vet tells him that they will stop standing
around and instead will lie down and wallow in grass when they are pregnant.
The man hangs up and gives it some thought. He comes to the conclusion that
artificial insemination means he has to impregnate the sheep. So, he loads the
sheep into his Landrover, drives them out into the woods, has sex with them
all, brings them back and goes to bed. Next morning, he wakes and looks out at
the sheep. Seeing that they are all still standing around, he deduces that the
first try didn't take, and loads them in the Landrover again. Hedrives them
out to the woods, bangs each sheep twice for good measure brings them back and
goes to bed Next morning, he wakes to find the sheep still just standing
round. One more try, he tells himself, and proceeds to load them up and drive
them out to the woods. He spends all day shagging the sheep and, upon
returning home, falls listlessly into bed.The next morning, he cannot even
raise himself from the bed to look at the sheep. He asks his wife to look out
and tell him if the sheep are lying in the grass ."No," she says, "they're
all in the Landrover and one of them is beeping the horn."
