Author Topic: Divorces: Perspective from a child (Read 391 times)

Horn · « **Reply #15 on:** October 23, 2002, 11:17:08 AM »

Quote

Originally posted by Ripsnort

The "Hating each other" part was the problem to begin with...other than infidelity, all other problems can be overcome with effort from both parties.

Disagree. You are assuming that the parents, because they "fixed" the problem, fall in love again. Vanishingly rare.

dh

Ripsnort · « **Reply #16 on:** October 23, 2002, 11:19:15 AM »

Quote

Originally posted by Horn

Vanishingly rare.

Yep, go look in the "60's" thread as to why.

Also, if you believe in personal responsibility and family values, it makes the "job" that much easier.

Also, how does one fall out of love? Never had that problem other than when someone cheated on me...

midnight Target · « **Reply #17 on:** October 23, 2002, 11:32:27 AM »

Divorce can happen for the best of reasons, but it will always have a negative effect on the kids as compared to a stable marriage.

My kids were much better off without their egg donor around. They will probably not be able to appreciate that for many many years.

Of course a stable 2 parent home would have been the best, but sometimes that option just doesn't exist.

And just once I'd like the media to focus on dead beat moms!

Ripsnort · « **Reply #18 on:** October 23, 2002, 12:16:11 PM »

To be honest, I probably *would have* been divorced twice by now had I not lived with the person I proposed to first...you find out alot about a person when you live with them vs. just dating them. Glad I waited until I was 30.

Nifty · « **Reply #19 on:** October 23, 2002, 12:33:55 PM »

I'm glad my parents divorced when they did. I would rather have grown up in the environment I did than in the inevitable hell that house would have become if the divorce hadn't happened.

I can't help but wonder if they had stayed together, if the "death do us part" wouldn't have come pre-maturely and by one of their hands...

Oh well, just another case of Eagler hoisting his moral views on the rest of us!

Ripsnort · « **Reply #20 on:** October 23, 2002, 12:40:29 PM »

Nifty, what Eagler is saying is basically, we have become lazy in regards to working towards our relationships. Its very easy to get a divorce. You don't have that religious cloud hanging over you saying you MUST work it out(thats good and bad IMO) and folks are just too willing to throw the towel in rather than work it out. I again point to the 60's. "no..I'M the center of the universe!"

Nifty · « **Reply #21 on:** October 23, 2002, 12:50:24 PM »

my parents tried working on it for several years before filing for the divorce. It wasn't just a spur of the moment thing or even after a few fights/arguments. After awhile, you need to know when to raise the white flag and surrender.

AKSWulfe · « **Reply #22 on:** October 23, 2002, 12:57:26 PM »

Nacho- yeah divorces and all that stuff changes you...

usually for the better, it's just a matter of how you take those experiences and use them. You can either blame all your lifes woes on those experiences, or you can overcome and use them as a means to better your own life.

It's up to you, you just won't realise it until later on down the road (I'd say around 19/20 you'll realise it).

It sucks, but it can make you a far better person than you may have been.
-SW

StSanta · « **Reply #23 on:** October 23, 2002, 01:03:39 PM »

Life is short and love is always over in the morning.

Suck it up and wander on.

Harsh as it is, I've proven time and time over that squeaking won't change things.

So diddly it. Am sure there's something amusing around the corner, one way or another.

Ah, there's Captain Apathy and Major Cynicism. Nothing like old friends.

See? That dinnae change a thing!

Eagler · « **Reply #24 on:** October 23, 2002, 01:10:55 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Nifty
Oh well, just another case of Eagler hoisting his moral views on the rest of us!

hehehe
and I don't even charge you for it

if anyone thinks I came from the Brady Bunch, your sadly mistaken ...

mother toughed it out until us kids were grown. anyone else have the pleasure of dear ole dad aiming his deer rifle at ur head while your trying to eat ur cereal ??

as Rip has stated, most take marriage nowadays with a grain of salt. something they can "quit" if they don't like it, and "try again" with someone else..

on the bright side, it gets you more bday/Xmas gifts ... doesn't it???

JB73 · « **Reply #25 on:** October 23, 2002, 06:25:39 PM »

29
Raised by single mother from age 2
mother remarried in 6th grade
stepdad and i have good relationship (especially now ...i believe u all know Mom passed away in July)
visited father every summer for a month from 7 yes old
Father is messed up relationship wise .. 4th marrige
father and i still have good relationship even though he thinks i have no direction in life

just so u know it's not all bad to be from divorced family though it is definately not recommended.
many more divorces work out badly and mess the kids up and make the parents get all wierd.