Author Topic: Who's reading what?  (Read 402 times)

Offline Ripsnort

  • Radioactive Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 27260
Who's reading what?
« on: December 19, 2002, 11:00:30 AM »
Who Reads What Newspapers?

1. The Wall Street Journal is read by the people who run the
country.

2. The Washington Post is read by people who think they run the
country.

3. The New York Times is read by people who think they should
run the country.

4. USA Today is read by people who think they ought to run the
country but don't really understand the Washington Post. They
do, however, like their statistics shown in pie chart format.

5. The Los Angeles Times is read by people who wouldn't mind
running the country, if they could spare the time, and if
they didn't have to leave LA to do it.

6. The Boston Globe is read by people whose parents used to
run the country and they did a far superior job of it, thank
you very much.

7. The New York Daily News is read by people who aren't too
sure who's running the country, and don't really care as long
as they can get a seat on the train.

8. The New York Post is read by people who don't care who's
running the country, as long as they do something really
scandalous, preferably while intoxicated.

9. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't
sure there is a country or that anyone is running it; but
whoever it is, they oppose all that they stand for. There are
occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority
feminist atheist dwarfs, who also happen to be
illegal aliens from ANY country or galaxy as long as they are
democrats.

10. The Miami Herald is read by people who are running another
country but need the baseball scores.

11. The National Enquirer is read by people trapped in line at
the grocery store.
:D

Offline Bluefish

  • Copper Member
  • **
  • Posts: 186
Who's reading what?
« Reply #1 on: December 19, 2002, 11:08:12 AM »
Investors Business Daily is read by people who think they surely have enough brains to run the country but need to make a WHOLE lot of money first (and not from their day job).

The Arizona Republic is purchased by people who have in their possession a lot of fish needing refrigeration.

Offline H. Godwineson

  • Nickel Member
  • ***
  • Posts: 551
Who's reading what?
« Reply #2 on: December 19, 2002, 11:23:59 AM »
The Arkansas Democrat-Gazette is read by hicks, chicks, sicks, salamanders, reps, dems, doze, and state legislators who've led the state firmly into last place in nearly every major category.  Few of the above can write a coherent letter to the editor and some shouldn't even be allowed to visit Washington, D.C.  They aren't capable of leading the country, although many of them are easily led.  Some have no lead in their pencils, and if you informed them of that, they'd want to know why they couldn't use an ink pen instead.

Shuckins

Offline beet1e

  • Persona Non Grata
  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 7848
Who's reading what?
« Reply #3 on: December 19, 2002, 11:30:20 AM »
Ripsnort!  :)  You've given me a great idea for a new thread. :D

I've seen this joke before, but with English newspapers.
  • The Times is read by people who govern the country.
  • The Telegraph is read by people who used to govern the country.
  • The Independent is read by people who don't like the way the country is run, but don't want to run it themselves.
  • The Guardian is read by people who might one day run the country - and by Toad in his search for misleading gun stats. LOL
  • The Sun is read by people who don't care who runs the country, as long as they've got big tits!   (Check out Page 3 - click link at left of Sun main page)

Offline whgates3

  • Silver Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1426
Who's reading what?
« Reply #4 on: December 19, 2002, 12:37:38 PM »
nobody reads the oregonian, but many do the xword
†its!

Offline mrfish

  • Parolee
  • Gold Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2343
Re: Who's reading what?
« Reply #5 on: December 19, 2002, 12:51:51 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by Ripsnort
9. The San Francisco Chronicle is read by people who aren't
sure there is a country or that anyone is running it; but
whoever it is, they oppose all that they stand for. There are
occasional exceptions if the leaders are handicapped minority
feminist atheist dwarfs, who also happen to be
illegal aliens from ANY country or galaxy as long as they are
democrats.


actually, people only read the chronicle on sunday for the concert schedule:)

Offline SOB

  • Plutonium Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 10138
Who's reading what?
« Reply #6 on: December 19, 2002, 01:01:01 PM »
Heh, I'd read the Oregonion before I'd read the Statesman Urinal!  :)


SOB
Three Times One Minus One.  Dayum!

Offline Eagler

  • Plutonium Member
  • *******
  • Posts: 18758
Who's reading what?
« Reply #7 on: December 19, 2002, 01:04:58 PM »
I read FoxTrot - everyday! :)
"Masters of the Air" Scenario - JG27


Intel Core i7-13700KF | GIGABYTE Z790 AORUS Elite AX | 64GB G.Skill DDR5 | 16GB GIGABYTE RTX 4070 Ti Super | 850 watt ps | pimax Crystal Light | Warthog stick | TM1600 throttle | VKB Mk.V Rudder

Offline SFRT - Frenchy

  • Platinum Member
  • ******
  • Posts: 5420
      • http://home.CFL.rr.com/rauns/menu.htm
Who's reading what?
« Reply #8 on: December 19, 2002, 01:13:17 PM »
I read the O'club evryday and form my general knowledge of the world thx to Udet, Grunherz ...
Dat jugs bro.

Terror flieger since 1941.
------------------------

Offline whgates3

  • Silver Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 1426
Who's reading what?
« Reply #9 on: December 19, 2002, 01:30:23 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by SOB
Heh, I'd read the Oregonion before I'd read the Statesman Urinal!


judging from the sound of it, you read neither.
neither do i.
(OK, if its laying around i pick up the snoregonian & read 'Dilbert' & maybe 'the edge'))