Just read about this in my local newspaper. There's been a big rise in drug related deaths recently, and it seems to be linked to a drug called 'cake'.
Cake's a Bi-sterbile Cradabolic Anphetamoid - which is a made up psycho-active chemical. It comes from Prague, with its own culture of Boon raves - so named after the part of the brain that deals with time perception (called the Shatner's Bassoon).
A couple of organisations over here are pushing an awareness campaign - 'Free the United Kingdom from Drugs' in conjunction with 'British Opposition to Medically Bi-sterbile Drugs' (F.U.K.D and B.O.M.B.D). The leading anti-drug activist Bernard Manning has been giving interviews about this drug, and I caught him on the cutting edge youth programme, Hartbeat:
"One little kiddie on cake cried all the water out of his body. Just imagine how his mother felt. It's a f***ing disgrace. "
Now, I've met him personally and he's the most mild-manned and above all clean-talking guy you'll ever meet - that's how much this Cake business has got to him.
They've even got celebrities on board, like Rolf Harris:
"This colour [bright yellow], that they thought would be a good selling point, is put in using an industrial dye which in itself is a pollutant and is causing in Czechslovakia something called 'Czech neck'. It causes enormous water retention so that the body swells up ... until the person that is on the trip dies from not being able to breathe at all."
So, I'm just warning all my American friends to look out for this drug. It's only a matter of time before it finds its way across the atlantic...
