I know what you are getting at Jimbear, you want something that would indicate a kill yet not actually kill the plane. Kinda like a tag, you're dead, thing where you fly on based on the current damage model. The function for that isn't there.
My point was, if someone lands hits on you at all you should consider the fact that you lost. A single .303 hit might be enough to pilot kill you so flying where you accept some hits is not a good practice. The ping sounds and hit sprites show hits to both players so try and use that. I know that you may not die to the first hit in the MA, but you also may, so by accepting even a single hit you are effectively rolling-the-dice of luck.
-Soda
AH Training Corp
The Assassins.