Tard Blog

[Nash]

This is bad... and I may burn in hell (were there, in fact, a hell) for posting this link and exposing yet more people to this website. I thought long and hard about it (okay, a few seconds), and humbly present to you tardblog.com.

The author is a special ed teacher of mentally handicapped students. She calls them tards. Her blog is the day to day accounting of what transpires in her classroom. You could call them little tard vignettes.

Is it wrong to laugh at these? I think so, perhaps.

But... I... do...

My mom was a special ed teacher. When my brother and I were little kids and had a day off school (teacher's staff days for example) my mom sometimes used to bring us with her to spend the day at her school. Needless to say we were witness to countless of these episodes.

Here's one example, taken from tardblog.com:

#13: Tard loses fight:

"Angelo was walking towards the coat room today, when he clipped one of the classroom tables with his hip. Feeling slighted, he cursed at the table and swung his leg to kick the corner he'd bumped into. He missed the table leg by inches and sent his foot smashing into the underside of the table. He screamed and bent down to grab his toes, banging his head against the topside of the table.

At this point Angelo started crying, fell on his butt, and started trying to take his shoe off. He leaned forward to untie his shoe and hit his forehead against the edge of the table. After this he just curled up into a ball. I have never seen a tard lose a fight with an inanimate object quite as badly as this."

Also included are such gems as:

Francis: The Worst Tard Ever

The field trip

Meet Augusta...but don't touch him

Tard likes fire

Tard nearly kills old person

Tard brings candy, flips out

Even punishments can be funny

Tard flips out, makes a mess

Augusta's fear of germs hit new level

Riti teaches the tards about sex
 

Anyways, these can make for some, erhm, interesting reading. The special ed teacher tackles the moral aspect of her blog in the FAQ. What do you think? Is it funny? Is it just wrong? Is it both?

[Wilfrid]

In the hopes that he would drain his battery, I put on the manual breaks and walked back over to our classes line.

And she's a teacher?!?

[Curval]

I'm not in a special ed class but one day I needed to change a lightbulb..to get to it there was a small bedside table that I decided to drag underneath the light.  Trouble was, it was flush to the ground.  As I dragged the table I ended up dragging it across my toes on my right foot.

In agony I dropped to the ground grabbing my squashed toes.  My dog decided to investigate,  He came over and put his head in my lap.  My girlfriend was trying not to let me see her laughing and backed into the door making a "bang" which startled the dog.  He raised his head to see what the noise was and his forehead connected with my eye.

I didn't know which body part to nurse first.

Unable to contain herself my girlfriend erupted in laughter adding to the flash of anger that always accompanies sharp self-inflicted pain.

I guess I'm just a regular tard.

[OIO]

gee, thats almost as bad as when i stapled my finger.

[GrimCO]

I was walking through the hangar at work one day when someone called my name. I turned around, answered his question, then quickly turned around again only to be met right in the forehead by the trailing edge of a Cessna 172's wing.

If any of you are familiar with this plane, it has diamond shaped open corrugations all along the trailing edge. It stamped a perfectly diamond shaped piece of skin right out of the middle of my forehead just like a cookie cutter.

Profuse bleeding, and a nice diamond shaped scab for weeks. Right between the peepers.

[SOB]

Oh how I love the tardblog!  BLOG!

One of my favorites - http://tardblog.com/sha/11.htm


SOB

[Hortlund]

That Blog is SOOO funny.

[midnight Target]

I taught special ed for 5 years... there wasn't a day that went by that I didn't laugh out loud.

One guy, John, used to slap his chest when he was excited. He had this look on his face like he had won the lottery.... When you asked him why he was happy he'd look up at the sky and yell... "Da Moon!!" If you asked him why the moon made him happy he'd look at you solemnly and say.. "new shoes".
go figure.

Ralph was a brain damaged older fella. When he got mad he would look at you and say... " Don't make me cuss now! Thats it, I'm gonna call you a name! ... you ...you ... jap!" (I have no idea why he thought "jap" was the worst thing you could call someone.)

[rpm]

As the father of a child with disabilities I gotta say this is just wrong.

[straffo]

Remind me when I was but between two tard having a "spoon fight"  and having to make them stop ...

if you've never heard a the sound spoon slammed on a skull you don't know how loud this sound can be

[midnight Target]

True Story... may have posted it before..

Some of our teachers decided it would be a good idea to take a few of our higher functioning students down to Tijuana for some shopping. One of these students, we'll call him Freddy, had an unusual reaction to stress. He would start to yell out certain phrases.... like:

"Scores 14 to 7"
"Its Monday hun."
"Out the way copper."

Now Freddy also happened to be hispanic, so when the car was coming back from Tijuana the US border guards did the usual check then decided to ask everyone in the car where they were born. Everyone had answered properly until they got to Freddy....

Guard - "Where were you born sir?"
Freddy - "Its Monday hun"
Guard - "Excuse me?"
Freddy - "Scores 14 -7"
Guard - "I asked where you were born sir!"
Freddy - "Out the way copper!"

The car was sent over to the special inspection area... it didn't take long to convince the BP that they were a "special" group of students.

[gofaster]

19: Joe's Pencil:

Needless to say, that tard room I work in doesn't have a pencil sharpener. I have one that suction cups to my desk that I keep in a locked drawer. Whenever I need to sharpen a pencil, I take it out, clamp it down, and sharpen away. Today I got the sharpener out for Antonio's pencil. I figured while I have it out I might as well ask if any of the other tards need their pencils sharpened. I make this announcement, and Joe immediately wedges his head under his desk and starts crying.

This doesn't surprise me. Joe usually acts this way whenever he has done something wrong. I walk over to him and ask him what the problem is.


"Nothin'" he replies.

 
I go back to my desk to begin sharpening tard pencils. Most of the tards come up, including Joe. One by one they hand me their pencils and I sharpen them. Joe steps up and hands me a magic marker.

I manage to explain to Joe that it isn't a pencil, and you don't need to sharpen it. Joe insists that it is a pencil and that I have to sharpen it. I'm about to explain for a second time, when Joe grabs the marker and shoves it in the pencil sharpener. He starts cranking the poor thing like crazy and the marker begins bleeding all over the desk. By the time I pulled Joe away from the sharpener he had mauled the marker down to a one inch stub.

I made Joe sit down and write an apology, with a pencil that I provided. In his apology Joe wrote about how he had lost his pencil and he thought I would be angry, so he brought up a marker. He wrote that he thought he could trick me, and he is sorry.

I saw this coming as soon as she mentions that Joe put his head under the desk.

[Boroda]

It's not funny at all

Laughing at people who are mentally disabled is... don't know how to say it. Ugly. Extremely ugly.

A person who calls them "tards" can't be even let to come near to them.

In such a "politically correct" country as the US - isn't such a "blog" a reason enough to fire the b|tch immediately?...

[fd ski]

wouldn't be so funny if your kids were "tards" in question..

I can't believe that this person is allowed to work with those kids.

[vorticon]

dont worry...most of those types laugh at stuff found at http://www.stickdeath.com