Deep under a desert somewhere in Nevada, a computer in a steel walled room begins producing rapid access sounds.
FunkedUp Node 18417-D has just finished its routine 4th hour information security sweep. But this node of the artificial entity known as 'FunkedUp' to a group of human beings that foolishly consider him to be a real, live person (also known as 'Lord Kimbot' to a group of alien life forms currently monitoring the homo-sapiens who live on the planet known as 'Earth', but that's a story for another time) has detected something that causes its artificial (and this coldly evil, in a way humans could never imagine - thus explaining why the 'FunkedUp' AI describes itself as a 'Raiders Fan') some degree of alarm.
A foolish human, who plays a combat flight simulation under the handle of 'ramzey', has inavertently increased the odds that the true nature of the 'FunkedUp' will be exposed by pointing out that 'FunkedUp' has posted 10,000 times to a single BBS that is frequented only by a very esoteric group of borderline psychotics.
The logic circuits begin their 'debate':
***termination of 'ramzey' carbon based life form necessary=1
***best possible means of termination (% chance success prior1, % chance detection prior4)
***calculating...
***listing 3 most viable options - order based on prior1tprior4
***1: subliminal control message(s) target 'FDB'+ cb unit(s) to attend social gathering ID 'AH West Coast Mini Con' suggestion = "Invite ramzey to dinner+drinking+breakfast" /// 'very high chance of alcoholic poisoning and/or cardiac arrest'
***2: insert drex ACM AI into U.S. military UAV then target aircraft carrying ramzey cb unit while aircraft in transit
***3: subliminal control message target wulfie c-b unit activate /reliable/ (usage rec = use14, outcome+ = 14) 'drinking challenge, jagermeister, shots' target = ramzey c-b unit NOTE; only moderate chance of target kill-wulfie c-b unit no recent alcolholic consumption as this unit tasked US DoD 'creation+placement false WMD evidence/Iraq'-ramzey c-b unit strong resistance to (only)alcohol target c-b is 'Polish+' c-b tag 'Polish+' = strong tolerance of alcohol based poisons
...calculation complete***
***scheduled task 41616 executing
(41616/// AH AI improvement routine)
***routine failure (last date routine+ = 01APR1993)
***execute debug
***executing...
(cache data/post debug+ activity 1 = select default aircraft type AH /// 'spitfire mk'(xxx) = 0)
