Military Survival Rules

[Dune]

"Aim towards the enemy." - Instruction printed on U.S. Army rocket launcher

"When the pin is pulled, Mr. Grenade is not our friend." - U.S. Army
training notice

"Cluster bombing from B-52s is very, very accurate. From 30,000 feet, every single bomb always hits the ground." - U.S. Air Force ammunition memo.

"If the enemy is in range, so are you." - Infantry Journal

"A slipping gear could let your M203 grenade launcher fire when you least expect it. That would make you quite unpopular in what's left of your unit." - Army preventive maintenance publication

"Try to look unimportant; they may be low on ammo." - Infantry Journal

"Tracers work both ways." - U.S. Army Ordnance Corps memo.

"Five-second fuses only last three seconds." - Infantry Journal

"Bravery is being the only one who knows you're afraid." - Col. David H. Hackworth

"If your attack is going too well, you're probably walking into an
ambush." - Infantry Journal

"No combat-ready unit has ever passed inspection." - Joe Gay

"Any ship can be a minesweeper - once." - Anonymous

"Never tell the Platoon Sergeant you have nothing to do." - Unknown Army recruit

"Don't draw fire; it irritates the people around you." - Your buddies

"If you see a bomb disposal technician running, try to keep up with him." - U.S. Army ordnance manual

"It is generally inadvisable to eject directly over the area you just
bombed" - U.S. Air Force flight training manual.

[wulfie]

This one will forever stick in my (small) mind:

When going thru the classroom portion of 'basic demolitions', the students were provided with a 'master demolitions table'.

The table had the name(s) (common and chemical formula) of numerous types of explosive materials, where you could find them (i.e. 'liquid, used in pre-199x 5" naval HE") in case you needed to construct an IED, REF (relative explosive force - so you knew how powerful the stuff was when running the calculations for different types of demolition work), and 'special notes'. The 'special notes' area usually had 'notes' along the lines of "Do not confuse with xxxxxxxx appearance and odor are highly similar" or "causes severe dermatitis handle with extreme caution" or "highly unstable at temperatures exceeding xxxx", etc.

About 2/3 of the way down the table, in the 'special notes' column for one type of material, it read...

"Highly toxic - do not eat"

...now one of the certain things in the military is if there is a specific rule/regulation/warning/guidline/addendum to SOP its creation is almost always the result of someone's (very bad) experience.

I have always wondered the circumstances that caused someone to add that 'special note'.

Mike/wulfie

[wulfie]

Another great one is from a SERE manual. It explains how to kill and eat wild beavers (yeah, I know - you all are experts on that already).

No joke - it says something along the lines of 'the beaver has very sharp teeth - catch it by the tail and immediately start swinging it in circles - the circular motion will put the beaver to sleep at which point you should swing it head first into a tree or other hard object to kill it so it can then be eaten'.

Who in the hell figured out this technique the first time? How to catch and kill a beaver with no knife, etc.?

Mike/wulfie

[AKS\/\/ulfe]

Originally posted by wulfie
No joke - it says something along the lines of 'the beaver has very sharp teeth - catch it by the tail and immediately start swinging it in circles - the circular motion will put the beaver to sleep at which point you should swing it head first into a tree or other hard object to kill it so it can then be eaten'.

Who in the hell figured out this technique the first time? How to catch and kill a beaver with no knife, etc.?

I dunno, but I bet they were screaming like a little girl while doing it.
-SW

[Dinger]

Front of the M18A1 Claymore Mine:

FRONT TOWARDS ENEMY

Back of the M18A1 Claymore Mine:

DO NOT EAT

always liked those

[Saurdaukar]

Another good one:

"Incoming fire has the right of way." -Infantry Journal

[davidpt40]

Back of the M18A1 Claymore Mine:

DO NOT EAT

always liked those

Think thats because a few troops were using the C4 in claymores to cook with during Vietnam.

[Blooz]

My favorite:

Always remember that your weapon was made by the lowest bidder.