Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => Aces High General Discussion => Topic started by: Flipperk on November 01, 2009, 07:32:50 PM
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..I remember when I started AHII back in 06 I was just learning all the ins and outs of the game, I was constantly being BnZ back to hell, and somehow my P51 was never faster than the other P51.
I remember one night, our country was about to win...all we needed was one more base and that would reset the map. I upped with about 6 other C47s to head over and just swarm the town with troops. The enemy was fighting back hard, a group of Me-262s upped from the base and ran to get speed. I didn't have a mic at this point in time so I was unable to talk. I heard over mission Vox that 5 Me-262s were coming in fast heading straight for the C47s, the C47s broke up and spread like cockroaches in the light. Two of the 262s were shot down from the guys flying in from the moon, the other 3 managed to pull away. They did not go after me first so i kept on pushing towards the base, we were now about half a sector away...the base was in view. About 3 minutes later I get a TON of Check6's and I see 2 me262s coming up and behind me...gaining fast. I hit the wep key to just buy a few more seconds...my heart was pounding...I then realized i was the only C47 left out of the group that took off...it was up to me. When they got 1K away I chopped throttle and nosed down as hard as I could...redded out, I understood I could only do this for 5 seconds or so cause I was already at 4K when I nosed down. I didn't hear any pings after 3 or 4 seconds so I pulled up and saw the 262s turning around for another pass...I kept trucking along towards the base low and fast (or slow)...only about 2 minutes away now...The 262s line back up behind me at 3K and are closing fast...I had no room to manuver now...I was dead. Well thank goodness for the spacemen! 5 P51s dived down on the 2 262s and made small work of them...I was free to capture the base...the winning capture.
This was only my 3rd day online, but I was confident...I knew how to release troops and at what ALT to drop em out....BUT......I did not know that you had to drop them on the town...... :uhoh
I get to the base and I release the troops over the field...then the range vox went nuts
"WHO DROPPED THE TROOPS ON THE BASE!!???"
"ON THE TOWN IDIOT! ON THE TOWN!!"
"WHO IS THAT GUY??""
I augered as soon as they asked who I was...I felt so embarrised....
Noob moments are a classic....
I want to invite everyone to tell about their noob moments in time :D
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Im about a month into the game and i finally start getting decent kills.
I finally get enough perkies to get a 262 and it started down the runway very slowly.
I take off and I turned around and hit autoclimb and i went face first into the ground.
I was horrified and i quit the game for a week before coming back and turning my attention on bombers.
That was a horrifying experience too as i couldnt get the bombsite to work properly.
so yeah i sucked back then but i am finally decent.
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Sh*t, been playing since 05 and still learning.
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Hands up who crashed their first 262 while trying to vultch a plane taking off from a runway. :aok
I logged off in a hump after woulds and swore never to play AH2 again, I was on again the next day ofc. :D
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"The noob moments..."
Every time I take off. :(
Kazaa, I augered my first 50ft off the runway and died. Disco'd the second and rammed into an afk b17 the third. :cry :lol
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Squad decides to a 262 run... We spawn 6 x 262's on the runway..
Knights win the war... 6 262's die in their ack.. LOL
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Well the first thing I flew was a P-38. Since I still could not figure out how to change bases I flew for 20min only to encounter a 190. We circled each other for sometime trying to get on the others 6 O'clock. I ended up crashing into the mountain in the process. Then I took another plane and flew from the furthest base again, then I probably got shot down.
Thous were my 2 first sorties of Aces High II
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...I remember when I started AHII back in 06 I was just learning all the ins and outs of the game, I was constantly being BnZ back to hell, and somehow my P51 was never faster than the other P51.
I remember that as well. If it was a vet, musta pissed him off to have a newb escape from him.
I logged off in a hump after woulds and swore never to play AH2 again, I was on again the next day ofc. :D
My first time in a 262, I discoed 10 secs after take off. I too swore to quit playing, and ended up back on in 3 hrs. but I just ended up steering clear of the perked fighters other then the hawgs.
I was horrified and i quit the game for a week before coming back and turning my attention on bombers.
That was a horrifying experience too as i couldnt get the bombsite to work properly.
Damn, I got a newb in charge of my bombers...
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Thats why i call my bomber missions "Gunship Missions"
I cant hit anything but fighters in my bombers.
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Lol, I remember when me and ace buzzed a tower in an enemy base on a gunship mission. i got me 4 manned AAA kills.
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..I remember when I started AHII back in 06 I was just learning all the ins and outs of the game, I was constantly being BnZ back to hell, and somehow my P51 was never faster than the other P51.
II hit the wep key to just buy a few more seconds...my heart was pounding...I then realized i was the only C47 left out of the group that took off...it was up to me.
C47's have WEP?
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C47's have WEP?
Yes.
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Bruv119, my good friend and squad C.O never ceases to amaze me. After almost 5 years playing AH2 he just realized that you could use instant views, before that he was flying constantly in low visual range for about 2 and a half years and of course I got the blame for not mentioning the information to him sooner.
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first 262 i flew, I compressed and lawndarted in the middle of enmy field, had to be alot of people shaking thier heads or laughing. :joystick:
Cattb
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when did this happen? cause I remember someone pulling something simmilar with a 163.
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Bruv119, my good friend and squad C.O never ceases to amaze me. After almost 5 years playing AH2 he just realized that you could use instant views, before that he was flying constantly in low visual range for about 2 and a half years and of course I got the blame for not mentioning the information to him sooner.
LOL!! :rofl
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took up 2 Lancaster's in early war from a closed in airbase, cracked all three uptryimg to clear the hill, tried again but it said you do not have enough points for that plane. Thought wtf and checked hanger and was shocked to see I had just lost 1350 points for that short little mission.
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Was back when I was 13 years old. Found a squadron in the TA that looked pretty cool. Flew only Spit 9s (the dweeby spit back then) and seemed to teach the basics. The "entrance exam" for said squadron was a monitored (by the CO) dogfight with the recruiting officer (note that damage was turned on in the TA back then). This all seems cheesy now, but I was a 13 year old brand new to the game, and I thought it was awesome.
So, we go up over A1. The other guy starts a slow flat turn to the left, expecting me to fall out of the sky at first movement. I'd been into planes long enough not to fall for it. I went into a nose-down left turn until I got mostly around on him, pulled the nose back up, and fired. I missed in front of his right wing. BUT! My stray rounds blasted the cockpit of the CO who thought he was watching at a safe distance.
My first kill was on the CO of my first squadron.
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Bruv119, my good friend and squad C.O never ceases to amaze me. After almost 5 years playing AH2 he just realized that you could use instant views, before that he was flying constantly in low visual range for about 2 and a half years and of course I got the blame for not mentioning the information to him sooner.
Blaming the subordinates for everything "bad" that happens is the mark of a good C.O. Just ask SF3 :aok
Back many moons ago I was playing Air Warrior.I was flying along in a Corsair fat dumb and happy when I see a bandit way down under me.I immediatly go into a power dive keen for the kill!Everything was going great until the nose started to tuck under!Despite my best and most informed efforts the nose kept going under as speed went up.Finaly inverted and just about breaking the sound barrier I decide to ride it through but alas the water came up and hit me before I pushed it all the way around.I cant remember exactly what I had done but I had either left one notch of flaps out or the gear down and didnt realize it which caused it to tuck under once the speed went up :aok Best part was at the time I was showing my Dad my prowness in virtual air to air combat.He seemed to get a good laugh out of the whole incident!!!! :mad:
I have also sank many 109s and 262s <G>
Pipz
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We did a small mission one day. Had about 6 guys. We take 3 sets of buffs a couple of 110s, and a goon. We level the base, drop then drop the remaining eggs on town. We figured since there were so few of us we needed to take the small base down. All goes well except our troops get killed by an a20 that managed to get out prior to the leveling the base. I quickly auger and grab another goon. Our guys take fighters back for cover. The trip is well over a sector. Carefully I maneuver to a good angle for the approach to town. One of guys drags the cons away from town. Another takes out a con near town. I'm getting close. A spit who is heading directly toward me changes directions and pursues our guy. I get over town, it's clear, it's down, and then and then I let out field supplies. :furious
I apologized profusely!
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Upped a Panzer and headed off for the nearest enemy field. After 10-15 minutes i thought WTF it will take me an hour of Driving! No more GV's for me I thought until oops! Vehicle Spawns! :O
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Squad decides to a 262 run... We spawn 6 x 262's on the runway..
Knights win the war... 6 262's die in their ack.. LOL
(http://www.fmft.net/doh%20homer%20simpson%20doh.jpg)
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Noob moments are not reserved entirely to newer players. I bravely led my entire flight of 8 heavy Pony D's into a canyon that I was sure we could thread our way through to target. You should have heard my squaddies screaming, laughing and crying as Pony after Pony tried and died to make it over the hump. I still get ribbed to this day by my Pig Brethren. :rofl
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Fairly noob, I'd acquired enough bomber perkies to up a flight of Ar234s. Loaded them with 100% fuel and the heaviest bomb-load, took off down the runway, eased off just before the tarmac ran out - and stalled straight into the drink.
:rolleyes:
Oops.
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Well....This one time stodd shot me down. :D
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I cant tell you the amount of times i smacked into the side of a canyon back on the BETA map in early 2000... I wish I forgot how to play the game sometimes, learning was pretty fun. :aok
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Noob moments are not reserved entirely to newer players. I bravely led my entire flight of 8 heavy Pony D's into a canyon that I was sure we could thread our way through to target. You should have heard my squaddies screaming, laughing and crying as Pony after Pony tried and died to make it over the hump. I still get ribbed to this day by my Pig Brethren. :rofl
I remember that flight, lol, funny stuff.
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Finally earned enough perkies for a 262 and started to take off. Well, I dont use auto take off, and some how I got the plane turned some to the left. Just managed to get the gear up when I collided into a hanger. That was probably my greatest noob moment.
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Hands up who crashed their first 262 while trying to vultch a plane taking off from a runway. :aok
*raises hand meekly*
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I was in a Tiger once and ODallasO augured his 110 into me...and PM'd me with: "Learn how to fly noob". :devil
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Well....This one time stodd shot me down. :D
Liar!!! Ive yet to shoot anyone down. :)
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I did land a completely intact 38 once,still not sure what i did wrong.............
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I did land a completely intact 38 once,still not sure what i did wrong.............
Probably put the gear down. First problem was putting them up to begin with.
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The first few days I started this game I thought the c.205 was the only plane in this game. It started me in this plane and I had no idea how to change all I knew was what some dude told me "you have to earn the other planes". Took me a while to figure out how to get into the hanger. Oh an my first kill ever was a guy who was on the runway in his 262, luckily I didnt know how to tune 200 yet.
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Upped a 262 and actually got it airborne without augering. Fly over a port that's being hit hard. I see a flight of B-26s below me. I nose the 262 over and angle for the shot. I go past the bombers at about 800 mph and hit the beach. I guy Pm'd me with the following: " Were you the 262 that was on me? You just disappeared and I got a kill." Apparently he missed the new pond forming on the beach.
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After reading on how to calibrate/set your salvos and delay for BUFFS ( the pic shows craters on the runway) i up a set of 17's to and airfield about 7 sectors way...it was near a current furball and i was thinking ill shut this base down, i line up with the runway (small base) drop all my bombs right down the middle thinking it was gonna disable them from taking off. :( :headscratch: and i was soooo wrong.
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Landing at a base that had just been taken wondering why my ack was shooting at me.
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When I started this game, for the first couple of flights I flew Hurri 1's and Spit 1's exclusively, thinking that this is the closest representation of a 'Level 1' in the game.
I died a lot.
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My worse "jet" incident happened maybe 4-5 months after I started playing back in 05. Took a 262 out, more or less depleting all my hard earned fighter perks, and head over to where the big furball is going on at. Climb out to about 10-12K and head in at max rpm. Get over the fight, look down and see a P-47 at around 8-9K. I roll my 262 over and pull. Right about the time I get my nose on him, he pushes over and goes into a negative G dive. Well I know I'm faster than a Jug so I stay with him. 6-5-4-3K and al of a sudden he starts pulling up. I give a nice gentle pull to keep the nose on him and nothing happens :headscratch: Ok maybe need a little more pull :joystick: Nothing doing :O Managed to dive from 12K right into the rearm pad at an enemy base with about 40-50 enemy conns and as many friendly conns watching :furious That's when I learned what compressed means.
BUT WAIT!!!!! I wasn't done!!!!!
Oh no. I had the itch to fly a jet for some reason that night so what do I do? Grab an AR234 and go on a bomb run. Makes sense right since I burned all my fighter perks. One little problem though. Forgot to uncheck the formation box while in the hanger so I up a complete flight of 234's burning most of my bomber perks. OK no big deal, I've flown the 234 before and more or less know how it handles. I take off, check six and see my drones falling into formation, ok all is good. About that time my little girl walks in looking for some attention. No problem, hit the auto climb button, turn in my chair to pick up my little girl so she can sit on my lap while I fly. As I'm turning back to the screen I get there just in time to watch all 3 of my 234's dive straight into the side of a hill :huh
I lost around 500 perks in the span of about 10 minutes because I was a NOOB :salute
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When i finally had enough perks to afford a 262 I upped it...I got on the runway and tookoff...no big deal
After 5 minutes I was 5K going full RPM, I see a formation of b17s so I go in to attack...I make a pass and nail the left wingman and completely destroyed him. While I was looking back to see the bomber go down I heard **ONE** ping...I look to the front and to my horror I was wounded...
I turned around quickly and flew towards the nearest friendly base 2 sectors away....Finally after 5 minutes I reach the base and had my flaps down and everything....I was only about 10 seconds away from touching down....then I died...
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I was taking off in a 262, and there was a 190 about to vultch the field, so I nosed down while still on the runway and once i got to a certain speed.....BOOM!
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What happened to winning the war and re setting the world? back in the old days I always thought that was pretty fun .
Oh yeah... this one time at band camp I.....Oh, wrong forum :)
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Been playing for years....
Never had a noob moment....only lack of training!
:uhoh
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I shot a few orange planes my first day................
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I shot a few orange planes my first day................
:headscratch: Trying to figure this one out...can't even think of anything orange except one of the N1K2-J skins.
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several of them actually. And every time I fly that plane, I'm gona use one of the orange skins to taunt other people :cheers:.
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I encourage HTC to get in on this :)
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When I started this game, for the first couple of flights I flew Hurri 1's and Spit 1's exclusively, thinking that this is the closest representation of a 'Level 1' in the game.
I died a lot.
I did the same thing, because I thought "man these things carry a lot more ammo, why would anyone wanna fly a plane with only 200 rounds?" :lol
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Well, I had a head start on the two of you, I had found out cannons did more damage than MG's am .50's did more than .303's, or 7.62mm. When I first saw those my reaction was "Who the hell puts 8 303's on a fighter?"
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Priceless moment...
Going in to vulch a base, I decide "hey, I have bombs, let's try these!" Only issue, I was unaware that your own bombs could kill you if you don't pull up. ;)
I had too many issues with ordy... ;)
But, onto fighters, was in a decent sized furball in a, now I know, P-51, when I look around and see I'm the only "good guy" left, of course, I've shot about 3/4 of my ammo without a single hit, and over range, I hear "Trig, what plane you in?" I, at this time didn't know you could choose your plane, so I of course reply with "How do you find that out?"
Needless to say, I was esentially tared and feathered.
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I'm still a noob.
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Asking for a Gunner, and receiving a reply from 83249220. Who promptly started emptying my guns, before I reached 3k. The "Hey WTF are you doing, HEY stop that, HEY, Hey you little bastage, WTF, Hey stop that", had no avail. I don't take joy riders now. :mad:
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Asking for a Gunner, and receiving a reply from 83249220. Who promptly started emptying my guns, before I reached 3k. The "Hey WTF are you doing, HEY stop that, HEY, Hey you little bastage, WTF, Hey stop that", had no avail. I don't take joy riders now. :mad:
:lol
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My favorite was:
On the VOX "Changeup...PLEASE STOP SHOOTING THE GREEN GUYS....SHOOT THE RED ONES, NOT THE GREEN ONES"
<PAUSE>
On the VOX "Geezus....why do we get all the newbs?....what a smokepole....."
On the VOX "I know man....doesn't he know he will shoot himself down?"
On the VOX "He doesnt have to worry about it...he's at 200 and still hasn't hit anything"
"Really?? lol.....maybe he will reload"
"He doesn't know what a reload pad is!"
VOX lights up with thunderous laughter and applause....
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The game, by default, tunes you to channel 101. And whether I did it or not (not knowing how at this point) I had squad highlight on. So I was shooting at people on the VOX channel 101.
:headscratch: Trying to figure this one out...can't even think of anything orange except one of the N1K2-J skins.
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Priceless moment...
Going in to vulch a base, I decide "hey, I have bombs, let's try these!" Only issue, I was unaware that your own bombs could kill you if you don't pull up. ;)
I had too many issues with ordy... ;)
But, onto fighters, was in a decent sized furball in a, now I know, P-51, when I look around and see I'm the only "good guy" left, of course, I've shot about 3/4 of my ammo without a single hit, and over range, I hear "Trig, what plane you in?" I, at this time didn't know you could choose your plane, so I of course reply with "How do you find that out?"
Needless to say, I was esentially tared and feathered.
with this power, i will use this against you in a plane arguement....
.....
:devil
#299
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Asking for a Gunner, and receiving a reply from 83249220. Who promptly started emptying my guns, before I reached 3k. The "Hey WTF are you doing, HEY stop that, HEY, Hey you little bastage, WTF, Hey stop that", had no avail. I don't take joy riders now. :mad:
Lol, had the same thing happen to me when I was on an HQ raid. Only differenc was he started shooting about halfway there, and wouldn't stop. I'm guessing he was a spy looking for HQ raiders, and try and get em' killed since he left as soon as he depleted my nose gun. He basicly made that entire 1hr flight pointless since I didn't make it.
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Lol, had the same thing happen to me when I was on an HQ raid. Only differenc was he started shooting about halfway there, and wouldn't stop. I'm guessing he was a spy looking for HQ raiders, and try and get em' killed since he left as soon as he depleted my nose gun. He basicly made that entire 1hr flight pointless since I didn't make it.
Yeah thats why I don't let anyone in my bomber anymore...
#304
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The game, by default, tunes you to channel 101. And whether I did it or not (not knowing how at this point) I had squad highlight on. So I was shooting at people on the VOX channel 101.
I did that alot too. I figured since their was 3 teams and i saw green for my side that red and orange would distinguish the other two. Many killshoots later I figured it out. :D
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Lol first time I was in a squad, I was escorting. The con color changed and I mistook him for a knit and damn near blew his wing off.
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Well, I had a head start on the two of you, I had found out cannons did more damage than MG's am .50's did more than .303's, or 7.62mm. When I first saw those my reaction was "Who the hell puts 8 303's on a fighter?"
Are you saying you were a better noob than I was? lol
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No, I'm saying I knew the differenc between weapons. But I thought "rpg" indicated the rate of fire, and so I always took the lighter load when avalable.
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Oh the joy of finding out you have enough perk points to take a Me-262. This was going to be the day that I would slash through my enemies and wreak havoc upon them. I sat on the runway with my engines at full power, brakes on. Then I started my roll down the runway picking up speed and anticipating the big moment when I would lift off into the skies. It was about that time that the barge, you know the one that comes all the way into shore then continues on to the airfield over land, crossed the runway right in front of me. Well the next thing you know I'm in the tower watching this stupid barge continue across the airfield.
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I thought drop tanks were a special kind of ordinance that would drop - or kill - tanks. I spent the better part of a day dropping my externals on GV's. The frustration of not scoring a single kill all bloody day finally got to me and I asked on local vox "How do you aim the drop tanks?".
Much mirth and merriment en-sewed.
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Awhile ago in a WB S3 event - my 1st S3 ever and my 1st mission ever with my new squad JG27.
On station in formation at 32k - fumbling around watching guages / listening to orders/course changes on TS / trying to stay on station with my wingie / keeping an eye out for the B17 stream or the hordes of P51s reported to be escorting them and...........
....resting my hand on the keyboard - "Enter Enter Enter"...WHA??!!!
..in silk at 32K watching my 190 spiral down pilotless and my squad disappearing into a cloud bank.
I don't know what was worse - the 32k float to earth or the SILENCE from my squad mates!!! LOL
....cheers eh! :D
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In the AvA while I'm dog fighting two Zero's in my P-38G and my wife has the gaul to walk by clothless. Distracted, I ended up getting one of the guys on my six who puts holes in my right wing fuel tank. no bigie - I extend and re-engage and swap over fuel tanks.
2 minutes later, she walks by again. This time the guy in the green Zero hits my left engine and it starts to smoke with an oil hit. Again, no biggie.
Moments later, another walk and she pauses to bend over to pick up something from the floor.
I flying right into sea.
Darn those clothless walk-by's with bendovers. Ruined my dog fight.
:x
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In the AvA while I'm dog fighting two Zero's in my P-38G and my wife has the gaul to walk by clothless. Distracted, I ended up getting one of the guys on my six who puts holes in my right wing fuel tank. no bigie - I extend and re-engage and swap over fuel tanks.
2 minutes later, she walks by again. This time the guy in the green Zero hits my left engine and it starts to smoke with an oil hit. Again, no biggie.
Moments later, another walk and she pauses to bend over to pick up something from the floor.
I flying right into sea.
Darn those clothless walk-by's with bendovers. Ruined my dog fight.
:x
We need film to confirm this :aok
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First squad bomber mission They said take out the VH. I assumed it meant VHF (radar tower). I bombed with out the bomb sights...cause I didn't know my ju 88 had one and missed the VH buy a mile. Squadies not to impressed.
It was my 3rd year playing when a squadie finally told me you could use your zoom view in the main gun of the tank to enlarge the picture and see what you where shooting at. Before that I was sooting at pixles on my screen. Oddly enough I did get a few kills at the old tank town.
My first 234 flight ended with collision into terrain. The funny part was one of my squadies was an airline pilot and was right behind me watching....he knew I was a noob and going to die. His comments on vox were beep beep beep your too low ....pull up pull up. It sounded exactly like the audible warning on an airliner. Was funny.
262's I could write a book.....cliff notes version they are too fast and to fragile. I still don't fly them but maybe twice a year.
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lol we had a squaddie (the only squeeker) and we was doing a special event, We was told to spawn on the runway but dont launch, we all proceed to lineup and get ready and guess what? the squeeker pulls his gun trigger :joystick: and kills like 10 of us just sitting there, that was priceless, thought the poor kid was going to cry cause he knew we were all pissed lol
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Squad decides to a 262 run... We spawn 6 x 262's on the runway..
Knights win the war... 6 262's die in their ack.. LOL
Knights won a war????
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After reading some of these stories, I don't feel nearly as bad about myself anymore. Thanks for the laughs.
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First flight ever, upped a Spit, gained a little altitude, saw a countryman was being trailed by multiple bad guys, flew in and waxed 3 in 1 swoop....., errr, what actually happened is I managed to get fast enough to compress the spit, flew right between countryman and bad guys, and made a lovely crater right on the beach :D
Oddly enough, countryman made it home, think the bad guys were too busy laughing at me...... :D
Wurzel
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Oh the joy of finding out you have enough perk points to take a Me-262. This was going to be the day that I would slash through my enemies and wreak havoc upon them. I sat on the runway with my engines at full power, brakes on. Then I started my roll down the runway picking up speed and anticipating the big moment when I would lift off into the skies. It was about that time that the barge, you know the one that comes all the way into shore then continues on to the airfield over land, crossed the runway right in front of me. Well the next thing you know I'm in the tower watching this stupid barge continue across the airfield.
Same damn thing happened the first time I upped a tiger. I upped right in the middle of a rook CV attack on a knit base.
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First day in the TA many years ago, flying my pretty Hog around with my mouse. I'm trying to figure things out as I read the help pages I have all typed up in a 3 ring folder. Suddenly I hear over the radio "Ace under attack". So I figure I have to find Ace and save him. I fly here, I fly there. None of the green icons say "Ace". Finally I type on the green text, where the hell is Ace at? I can't find him anywhere?
Much laffing, hoots, snickers, and of course the obligatory "what a noob". Someone finally PM's me and tells me it's not "Ace under attack" it's "Base under attack". I took a few days off before I went back hoping the guys forgot about it. Nope :(
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Hell, not as bad as thinking DT's kill tanks.... I mean it is pretty hard to understand if you never heard it before.
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Taking up a Mossie first couple of weeks, dieing and uping, dieing and uping. Took me about 2 months to land two kills, then I started to get better from then. Now look at me, 2 years ago I would have dreamed for 3 kills, and now I have landed 20 lol.
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Taking up a Mossie first couple of weeks, dieing and uping, dieing and uping. Took me about 2 months to land two kills, then I started to get better from then. Now look at me, 2 years ago I would have dreamed for 3 kills, and now I have landed 20 lol.
:huh
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I did the same thing, because I thought "man these things carry a lot more ammo, why would anyone wanna fly a plane with only 200 rounds?" :lol
I did that too.
Especially with the c205.
Why the hell would you want 250rpg when you can have 500rpg? :headscratch: :lol
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First day in the TA many years ago, flying my pretty Hog around with my mouse. I'm trying to figure things out as I read the help pages I have all typed up in a 3 ring folder. Suddenly I hear over the radio "Ace under attack". So I figure I have to find Ace and save him. I fly here, I fly there. None of the green icons say "Ace". Finally I type on the green text, where the hell is Ace at? I can't find him anywhere?
Much laffing, hoots, snickers, and of course the obligatory "what a noob". Someone finally PM's me and tells me it's not "Ace under attack" it's "Base under attack". I took a few days off before I went back hoping the guys forgot about it. Nope :(
LOL!!!!! :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
oh man!! :rofl
I did the same thing too :aok
#310
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My first flight ever was NOE with floatsup and Stroker1 (now Duhasst). Floats asked me if I knew what noe was. Of course not cause I was already falling behind and showing dar. Then of course he asked me to take out the vh on the low level pass. Of course there targets r down and it was up to me. I flew right over that VH and was sure I would nail it. Nothing happened. Floats or Stroker1 never told me to open my doors. Yet somehow I ended up with (+) for about a year. <S> to all who dawn the (+) insignia.
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yeah choker, from what I've seen (+) is pretty good about newbs.
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When I first started playing I was completely lost. If it wasn't for a player named HTTP, I would have probably set the joystick down and walked away and saved 10 years of my life lol. I remember the day I realized you could zoom the pizza map in and out... lol
Whatever happened to HTTP?
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changed his name or gone.
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:huh
What?
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Taking up a Mossie first couple of weeks, dieing and uping, dieing and uping. Took me about 2 months to land two kills, then I started to get better from then. Now look at me, 2 years ago I would have dreamed for 3 kills, and now I have landed 20 lol.
I sense a little bit of self loving in there.. :D
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My first encounter with AH was in version 1.04, way back when they had like only 10 fighters to choose from.
Up until then, I was quite confident that I was a pretty good stick according to my exepriences in Fighter Ace1 & 2.
My favorite ride was the Bf109F-4, which was plenty enough to take care all enemies but the frickin' Spit14 a la Fighter Ace.
So I get a free 2 week ticket, install AH, pick the Friederich with a grin on my face...
... roll down the runway skidding, stall out as the plane takes off, wobble around and crash into the tower.
I log off, uninstall AH, and gave up... until I started out again in v1.05.
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Fall of 2006:
My first time in this game was online, of course (what newb actually takes the advice of practicing offline first, right?) and since I had just seen a History Channel show on the F6F, I chose to fly that. I looked around the map, and saw the carriers and thought, "Oh! An F6F off a carrier! Perfect!" Not so perfect. I finally figure out how to up on the carrier, and an entire salvo of bombs promptly removes me and the carrier from the game.
At the time I had NO idea what happened, and couldn't figure out where the carrier went. Good news: There was a second carrier nearby, so I went and quickly died off of that one.
Was anyone else's first kill a HO and was anyone else as excited about it as I was? Looking back... I'm sure people were probably kicking and screaming on 200 about my HOing... it was really all I did for a while... :lol
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The year is 1997 - 1rst takeoff in WB 1.07 (?) . Look at radar - determine where the action is ( a vulched field somewhere ).
I hit the fly-button and there I was, sitting on the runway.
Hmmm 'e' for engine start, Prop start to turn.
A moment later a message from HOST
'Kill of wxyz awarded to save'
(someone flew into a hangar giving me maneuver kill)
The buffer start to fill up with " wtg save"
"what does wtg mean ?" I replied
The text buffer now starts to fill up with "LOL"
'what does LOL mean ?' ?
Well you get the picture of how a noob in online gaming felt :D
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I reamber my noob moment :old: i was in the spit9 with 5 guys on my 6 i learned to ho imagen that me a noob hoing yah i know right lol anyways there was 5 guys getting ready to ho me killed em all i got the first 3 then i collided in to the 4th my right wing riped off flew 500feet straight for 2 seconds my then my left wing collided in the 5th and he blew up same as the 4th one and i got 5 kills in the DA on my 1st week that is my noob moment sadly then i relized i got captured and i thought german boats would come and capture me o well :banana:
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I remember my noob moment. :old: I was in the Spit 9 with 5 guys on my 6. I learned to HO; imagine that, me, a noob, HOing. Yeah I know right? lol Anyways there were 5 guys getting ready to HO me. I killed them all! I got the first 3, then I collided into the 4th and my right wing ripped off. I flew straight for 500 feet for 2 seconds then my left wing collided with the 5th and he blew up same as the 4th one. I got 5 kills in the DA on my 1st week! That is my noob moment. Sadly I then realized I got captured and I thought German boats would come and capture me, oh well. :banana:
Punctuation, grammar, and spelling! :cry
Fixed... For the most part...
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Punctuation, grammar, and spelling! :cry
Fixed... For the most part...
do i care i got this new keyboard hard to find all the buttons :O :headscratch: :headscratch: :headscratch: :headscratch: :headscratch: :headscratch:
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I sense a little bit of self loving in there.. :D
Of course, I give myself a lot of credit becasue I know I have a decent amount of skill. I know I'm not the best, but I know I'm about the top 20% that fly's now.
I'm a Marine, I know I'm the best! :D
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I think one of the biggest noob moments of me and my entire squad was when all 6 of us dove in one a set of b24's from about 12k. Every single one of us died, we either augured or rammed the bombers.
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Lol, I remember when I collided with a landing bomber the first time I flew the 163.
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I remember I got 8 bomber kills in a 262 then headed back to land...
well I was being pursued by a few cons so I go in nice and low *This was when you could land at 500 MPH*
I decided I needed some extra feet for the runway so I would land in the grass about 200 feet ahead of the runway then brake to land..
well I forgot to put my gear down and I belly landed...thats fine I thought I should just barely make it!
...stopped about 15 feet short of the runway...
..ditched
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I hate when you have aimed your landing perfectly, and then when you touch down your gear brakes and screws up your landing.
Lol, I had been practicing carrier landings, and the first time I flew the -4 hawg, the carrier turned just before I touched down and killed me.
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dogfighted 6 spittys on deck got 3 then a fellow rook says wth you doing greens? after he said that i blew up. DOH!! forgot i was ina 262 :headscratch: :headscratch: :headscratch:
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It was my first week of actually playing as Sandwich. Or was it before then? whatever.
It takes me an entire week to get 19 perks to fly the -1c. It took me a while looking at it to see the difference between it and the -1D.
IT HAD 4 20MM CANNON!!!!
I sit on the carrier and waited untill it stopped turning before hitting WEP and moving down the carrier deck. I was heavy with 2 1000 pounders and rockets. I let auto take off do its job.
I slammed into the ocean. There goes my perks. I flip out.
1 week later I go light and take 25% fuel and take off from the carrier. It turns at the last second. Thankfully my wreck stops just short of falling off the carrier.
I take off again and i finally get it up. I am ecstatic. I fly over the airfield that we're attcking and see a plane coming out of the hangar. I go to vultch it.
I lawndart my -1C and quit the game for 2 days before coming back to it.
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Why do newbs vulch? I never vulched in my life. Even as a newb I thought it distateful.
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NVM
I thought it said moob moment
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Why do newbs vulch? I never vulched in my life. Even as a newb I thought it distateful.
It because your special. Oh here comes the bus now!
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THE BUS FULL OF CASH? WOOOT!!!!!! :x
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my n00b moment :rolleyes:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLtR8_qw_yM (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZLtR8_qw_yM)
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Not an AH nOOb moment but a very nOObish attempt at a mechanical bull
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mTZ5rRzggQk
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One good thing about noob moments is recalling them. Lucky for most of us we did not know about recording our flights when we started. If so make sure and erase them.
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Why do newbs vulch? I never vulched in my life. Even as a newb I thought it distateful.
It took me 2-3 weeks to amass 19 PERKS!!!
I took any kill that I could get at that time.
I used to HO, Vultch and Pick like there was no tomorrow.
Nowadays I find more joy in actually fighting and as such I only occasionally use planes with an ENY value under 10.
This was before I was sandwich and before I signed up for the forums. I had no idea what I was doing.
Granted, I am still clueless to some aspects of the game but I sure do make great bait.
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Every time I get into plane, as long as I am still flying, its noob moment :lol
Very first sortie I ever flew: I was upping in the pony, got maybe about 10 seconds in the air then boom, Lgay got me and I been hating those planes every since.
1st time upping 262: I either plowed into the ground or I hit the only tree in the area.
1st time upping 163; Collided with 234
First time dropping troops: Think I was about 25K (was reported 262 on the deck). I did that on purpose because no one was trying to kill the last building so I hoped by the time the troops landed (IF they ever did) my countrymen would have gotten it down: They didn't.
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Granted, I am still clueless to some aspects of the game but I sure do make great bait.
OK then, you will be an ack dragger, bait, or distraction in the squad.
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Yeah....i used to HO and think it was fun.
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i still ho for fun
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My first 262 sortie... fully aware of the awesome firepower of my 4 MK 108 cannons... I can HO everything out of the sky...
I forgot that I have to hit first. And unlike me, this enemy 190D DID hit, and I learned that it doesn't need 30mm guns to bring a 262 down... :o
The pilot was SirLoin :)
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I still have noob moments all the time. Augerd on take off then the very next time up wacked the side of a mountain. Uhhhg ! sorta felt like my first day all over again :)
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I still have noob moments all the time. Augerd on take off then the very next time up wacked the side of a mountain. Uhhhg ! sorta felt like my first day all over again :)
Did you ever let Tango or Skat know that I am going to return shortly? Next week is the most likely time since I have to mail in money order and that takes about 4 days :cry
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My time here is still one big noob moment.......
Sweet, your on your way back rogent.....hopefully I have a chance to run into you in first couple of days you are back......it'll give me a chance to get your name in my you have shot down stats.....well it'll give me a 30% better chance in any case..... Welcome home :lol :lol :lol....did you stop smoking whilst you were on hiatus
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Before about July, my time in the game was one long continious newb moment as well. I remember first looking at the planes in the hanger, and I was overwhelmed :lol. I couldn't pick between the many of the famous planes I'd heard about and see what they were like. I worked my way through the list writing down the ones I found I liked, and flying them. It was only in july I stoped testing fighters and actually flying them in serious combat.
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I sense a little bit of self loving in there.. :D
ya think? :lol
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What?
Topic is "Noob Moments" not "Look at Me". Just saying.
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Of course, I give myself a lot of credit becasue I know I have a decent amount of skill. I know I'm not the best, but I know I'm about the top 20% that fly's now.
I'm a Marine, I know I'm the best! :D
I didn't get that memo :P
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why did you just triple post? Just put all three quotes in one post :huh!!!!!!
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why did you just triple post? Just put all three quotes in one post :huh!!!!!!
Because I can.
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Because I can.
post count obsessing :noid?
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post count obsessing :noid?
You've got to be kidding :lol
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yes I am :noid...
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The price of silver is down so I'm converting my assets to gold :aok
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your still a silver, you know this right?
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your still a silver, you know this right?
You know gold comes after silver, right?
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Yup, looks like 27 left.
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Yup, looks like 27 left.
No idea, I don't keep track of that stuff
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Topic is "Noob Moments" not "Look at Me". Just saying.
Not saying, "Look at me! Look at!" Just summing up how much I have improved from my "Nooby" years. :)
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I still have n00b moments. After 5+ years.
One time though I was trying to pick some dweeb in a Ar-234. When I fired, I realized the cannon was aiming back. I comrpessed and broke up. I was laughed at. :D
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Why do newbs vulch? I never vulched in my life. Even as a newb I thought it distateful.
The only times (2) I have seen you online, you vulched me with your 205
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:rofl
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My worst newb moment I was flying the c205 I put it in auto climb. I got called away from my computer I came back 10 min later I was at aprox 21000 ft. OK no problem there. I happen to see a b17 lower than me. I went into a steep dive, had him in my sights pulled the trigger ..... Nothing... I pulled the trigger again, nothing... Well needless to say I got shot down and laughed at, I went in to the options mebu and found oit I had forgotten to map my joystick..can u say duhhhhh
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The only times (2) I have seen you online, you vulched me with your 205
Is the name capitolized? If so then there is someone else on with my name. I've never vlched anyone unless you call BnZ'ing an Il-2 or a hurricane IID vulching. And I mostly use the C.205 as a buff hunter. Lots of ammo, and great climb rate.
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My worst newb moment I was flying the c205 I put it in auto climb. I got called away from my computer I came back 10 min later I was at aprox 21000 ft. OK no problem there. I happen to see a b17 lower than me. I went into a steep dive, had him in my sights pulled the trigger ..... Nothing... I pulled the trigger again, nothing... Well needless to say I got shot down and laughed at, I went in to the options mebu and found oit I had forgotten to map my joystick..can u say duhhhhh
Done that once as well :lol
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Lol. I did that with a 262. I just got a new joystick and forgot to map it.
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maybe some noobs should read the book of the Dweeb
just on part written by jedi
The University of Dweeb
Many were they who milleth around in yon crowded Warbird skies, and vile was the heav'nly conflagration and great was the destruction and name-calling which layeth upon the Rolling (but not so Rolling as it once was) TerrainTM.
And in the fullness of time did yon newbie pilot Dweebly venture upon the scene, and readeth he yon holy Helpfile, and marketh he well the mystical newsgroup and yon sacred Scroll of Argo, and thus didst he yon Godsteed chooseth, and calleth he it by its legendary name Lightning.
And spinneth upon the runway didst he, and trumpeteth didst yon stallhorn, but yea, verrily didst he finally ariseth and taketh wing. But knoweth not of Flaps didst young Dweebly, and crasheth he to earth in fiery death, and picketh he many cannon shells from lo his very buttocks, and screecheth he, "A pox on thee, vile Zeke dweebs, for two canst that foul stallfight game playeth!"
And ariseth again didst he, in yon whirling dervish Oscar, and many Zekes didst he reapeth and send flaming to earth. But soon learneth he that tho yon flying matchbox was the ambrosia of his mighty Oscar, little else couldst he dent with his Holy Popguns of Antioch, and lo didst he return once again to the Godsteed.
And learneth he many magical incantations, and riseth he up on high, and spinneth and flippeth, and sweepeth he down on yon pitiful Hogflesh and Fiery Spit, and rendeth he much dweebish entrail onto the bloody airfields below. And yea, drag worryeth him not, and chaseth he down many a Mustang, and runneth he swiftly from yon vile FM-2 and Hurricane, and learneth he the magic of the nose-mounted convergenceless headon cannon. And soon didst the cries of "P-38 Dweeb!" ringeth in his ears, and though loveth he dearly his mighty Godsteed, yet didst he tire of magic, and yea, more didst he tireth of exploding into pieces with only a fleeting glance of a gray blur in his 90-degree field of view. And thus beginneth his courtship of Dora.
For lo, swift was Dora, and powerful her mighty thunderbolts, and quickly falleth he under the spell of the Wurger of the Apocalypse. And yea didst he WEPpeth back and forth through yon endless furball, and master of headon and collision code didst he becometh, and like wheat from the scythe didst the dweebs falleth. And never couldst they catch him (except for yon occasional elfin Lightning on pixie-dust) and rolleth he endlessly and lureth them onward didst he, even unto their very doom in his mighty fields of ack. And lo didst the calls of "Doradweeb!" and "Ack-runner!" ring in his ears, but heedeth them not didst he, for Dora had beguileth him, as she didst with all those who are dweebish.
But lo, one day didst cannon shells raketh his beloved Dora, and yea didst critical pieces departeth from his holy airframe, and as he looketh up, verrily was the SunglareTM eclipseth by yet another Rising Sun, and though tryeth mightily to follow he didst, yon green phantom couldst he not catcheth, and flyeth up didst St. Frank on his heavenly wings of Nakajima, and swoopeth back down upon young Dweebly it didst, and splattereth him upon yon countryside, and realizeth he, as he transporteth to his tower, than lo, had he been verrily Boometh and Zoometh.
And so didst young Dweebly biddeth fairwell to the temptress Dora, and for a time travelleth he with St Frank. And clever was St Frank, for climbeth he without peer, and speedeth he back down upon yon unsuspecting Mustang dweebs and separateth them from lo their very wings didst he. And verrily didst Dweebly learn of the mystical Dogfight Flaps, and turneth he even with yon Godsteed, and blasteth it from the sky. And lo, climbeth he even up to yon vile hammerhead turn Messerschmidt dweebs, and applyeth he the Holy 20mm Enema of Antioch to their nether regions, and laugheth didst he at their pitiful Walther P-38 fire from beneath their hapless parachutes. But lo, tiny was the ammo load of St Frank, and many were the sorties in which he creepeth cretinously away at high speed, unarmed, with cries of "Ki Dweeb!" ringing in his ears. And lo, on occasion when he didst checketh his back-and-up, seeth he dots high above, and wondereth he what manner of battle couldst there be so far from earth .
So one day, climbeth young Dweebly high above the mongrel carnage of the endless Dance of the Dweebs, yea, high above the magical "10" on his sacred Altimeter, and spyeth he many blue and silver planes, and creepeth he closer, and watcheth he their hunt, as they swoopeth down upon yon floundering Stallfish like mighty eagles of the sea, and feedeth upon yon Spitfire and Zeke. And so, followeth the Blue Planes didst he, and tryeth to catch them and sweep these high altitude scavengers from the sky. But LO! Tho catch them he couldst, flicketh and rolleth away didst they, and never couldst he bring his Holy Cannon to bear at such great speed. So speedeth he UP again, and avoideth he the Blue Planes, and swoopeth he down upon yon hapless Spits....and misseth! And again streaketh he back UP, and swoopeth down upon yon matchbox Zekes...and misseth again! And thinketh he "What manner of sorcery mayest this be? For never hath St Frank forsaken me." But alas, St Frank compresseth, and walloweth like yon Holy Hippo above 400 knots. And lo, verrily didst yon "ping-ping-ping" sound in Dweebly's ears, and explodeth didst he, for forgetteth he didst about yon Blue Scavengers.
And thus resolveth he to fly the Blue Planes, and worryeth not about cannon ammo, for armeth was he with many multitudes of shiny brass Bullets of Antioch, and much couldst he Sprayeth and Prayeth. And lo didst he climb, ... er, hi didst he climb into yon heavens, and even didst he the mythical "20" of sacred heights reacheth. And swoopeth down didst he, and misseth often at first, but grinneth with delight as yon "500" on the Holy Indicator of Haste was surpasseth. And swoopeth he again and again, and speweth he out Holy Hailstorms of 50-caliber, and rendeth he finally the wings of many hapless Zekes and Spits, and lo, even the unwary Dora and St Frank were powerless to avoid the Blue Roller Coaster of Death. And as his aim improveth, and he learneth to set his Holy Convergence not to 200, as the Wisedweebs of the Stallfight counseleth, nay, but to 400 or yea verrily, even 500, lo didst his score and killstreaks grow. For learneth he the secret: thou mayest kill at 450 kts, or thou mayest run at 450 kts, but thou mayest only die at 150 kts.
And yea, though the tiny voices of the dweebish herd below proclaimeth that he was indeed an "alt monkey" and an "alt dweeb," verrily was he a LIVE dweeb, and verrily were they about to be dead ones. And Dweebly smileth, for he knew it was good to be a dweeb. And it WAS good.
:-) jedi
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but grinneth with delight as yon "500" on the Holy Indicator of Haste was surpasseth. And swoopeth he again and again, and speweth he out Holy Hailstorms of 50-caliber,
and he learneth to set his Holy Convergence not to 200, as the Wisedweebs of the Stallfight counseleth, nay, but to 400 or yea verrily, even 500, lo didst his score and killstreaks grow. For learneth he the secret: thou mayest kill at 450 kts, or thou mayest run at 450 kts, but thou mayest only die at 150 kts.
:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
Holy Indicator of Haste did it for me
P.S. I'm pretty sure I just found the link to the Book of Dweeb. I had seen parts of it before but I think I found all of it now, it should make for quite a few laughs at work today.
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:rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
Holy Indicator of Haste did it for me
P.S. I'm pretty sure I just found the link to the Book of Dweeb. I had seen parts of it before but I think I found all of it now, it should make for quite a few laughs at work today.
hehe go for it
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"Wisedweebs of the Stallfight".
:rofl
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maybe some noobs should read the book of the Dweeb
just on part written by jedi
The University of Dweeb
Many were they who milleth around in yon crowded Warbird skies, and vile was the heav'nly conflagration and great was the destruction and name-calling which layeth upon the Rolling (but not so Rolling as it once was) TerrainTM.
And in the fullness of time did yon newbie pilot Dweebly venture upon the scene, and readeth he yon holy Helpfile, and marketh he well the mystical newsgroup and yon sacred Scroll of Argo, and thus didst he yon Godsteed chooseth, and calleth he it by its legendary name Lightning.
And spinneth upon the runway didst he, and trumpeteth didst yon stallhorn, but yea, verrily didst he finally ariseth and taketh wing. But knoweth not of Flaps didst young Dweebly, and crasheth he to earth in fiery death, and picketh he many cannon shells from lo his very buttocks, and screecheth he, "A pox on thee, vile Zeke dweebs, for two canst that foul stallfight game playeth!"
And ariseth again didst he, in yon whirling dervish Oscar, and many Zekes didst he reapeth and send flaming to earth. But soon learneth he that tho yon flying matchbox was the ambrosia of his mighty Oscar, little else couldst he dent with his Holy Popguns of Antioch, and lo didst he return once again to the Godsteed.
And learneth he many magical incantations, and riseth he up on high, and spinneth and flippeth, and sweepeth he down on yon pitiful Hogflesh and Fiery Spit, and rendeth he much dweebish entrail onto the bloody airfields below. And yea, drag worryeth him not, and chaseth he down many a Mustang, and runneth he swiftly from yon vile FM-2 and Hurricane, and learneth he the magic of the nose-mounted convergenceless headon cannon. And soon didst the cries of "P-38 Dweeb!" ringeth in his ears, and though loveth he dearly his mighty Godsteed, yet didst he tire of magic, and yea, more didst he tireth of exploding into pieces with only a fleeting glance of a gray blur in his 90-degree field of view. And thus beginneth his courtship of Dora.
For lo, swift was Dora, and powerful her mighty thunderbolts, and quickly falleth he under the spell of the Wurger of the Apocalypse. And yea didst he WEPpeth back and forth through yon endless furball, and master of headon and collision code didst he becometh, and like wheat from the scythe didst the dweebs falleth. And never couldst they catch him (except for yon occasional elfin Lightning on pixie-dust) and rolleth he endlessly and lureth them onward didst he, even unto their very doom in his mighty fields of ack. And lo didst the calls of "Doradweeb!" and "Ack-runner!" ring in his ears, but heedeth them not didst he, for Dora had beguileth him, as she didst with all those who are dweebish.
But lo, one day didst cannon shells raketh his beloved Dora, and yea didst critical pieces departeth from his holy airframe, and as he looketh up, verrily was the SunglareTM eclipseth by yet another Rising Sun, and though tryeth mightily to follow he didst, yon green phantom couldst he not catcheth, and flyeth up didst St. Frank on his heavenly wings of Nakajima, and swoopeth back down upon young Dweebly it didst, and splattereth him upon yon countryside, and realizeth he, as he transporteth to his tower, than lo, had he been verrily Boometh and Zoometh.
And so didst young Dweebly biddeth fairwell to the temptress Dora, and for a time travelleth he with St Frank. And clever was St Frank, for climbeth he without peer, and speedeth he back down upon yon unsuspecting Mustang dweebs and separateth them from lo their very wings didst he. And verrily didst Dweebly learn of the mystical Dogfight Flaps, and turneth he even with yon Godsteed, and blasteth it from the sky. And lo, climbeth he even up to yon vile hammerhead turn Messerschmidt dweebs, and applyeth he the Holy 20mm Enema of Antioch to their nether regions, and laugheth didst he at their pitiful Walther P-38 fire from beneath their hapless parachutes. But lo, tiny was the ammo load of St Frank, and many were the sorties in which he creepeth cretinously away at high speed, unarmed, with cries of "Ki Dweeb!" ringing in his ears. And lo, on occasion when he didst checketh his back-and-up, seeth he dots high above, and wondereth he what manner of battle couldst there be so far from earth .
So one day, climbeth young Dweebly high above the mongrel carnage of the endless Dance of the Dweebs, yea, high above the magical "10" on his sacred Altimeter, and spyeth he many blue and silver planes, and creepeth he closer, and watcheth he their hunt, as they swoopeth down upon yon floundering Stallfish like mighty eagles of the sea, and feedeth upon yon Spitfire and Zeke. And so, followeth the Blue Planes didst he, and tryeth to catch them and sweep these high altitude scavengers from the sky. But LO! Tho catch them he couldst, flicketh and rolleth away didst they, and never couldst he bring his Holy Cannon to bear at such great speed. So speedeth he UP again, and avoideth he the Blue Planes, and swoopeth he down upon yon hapless Spits....and misseth! And again streaketh he back UP, and swoopeth down upon yon matchbox Zekes...and misseth again! And thinketh he "What manner of sorcery mayest this be? For never hath St Frank forsaken me." But alas, St Frank compresseth, and walloweth like yon Holy Hippo above 400 knots. And lo, verrily didst yon "ping-ping-ping" sound in Dweebly's ears, and explodeth didst he, for forgetteth he didst about yon Blue Scavengers.
And thus resolveth he to fly the Blue Planes, and worryeth not about cannon ammo, for armeth was he with many multitudes of shiny brass Bullets of Antioch, and much couldst he Sprayeth and Prayeth. And lo didst he climb, ... er, hi didst he climb into yon heavens, and even didst he the mythical "20" of sacred heights reacheth. And swoopeth down didst he, and misseth often at first, but grinneth with delight as yon "500" on the Holy Indicator of Haste was surpasseth. And swoopeth he again and again, and speweth he out Holy Hailstorms of 50-caliber, and rendeth he finally the wings of many hapless Zekes and Spits, and lo, even the unwary Dora and St Frank were powerless to avoid the Blue Roller Coaster of Death. And as his aim improveth, and he learneth to set his Holy Convergence not to 200, as the Wisedweebs of the Stallfight counseleth, nay, but to 400 or yea verrily, even 500, lo didst his score and killstreaks grow. For learneth he the secret: thou mayest kill at 450 kts, or thou mayest run at 450 kts, but thou mayest only die at 150 kts.
And yea, though the tiny voices of the dweebish herd below proclaimeth that he was indeed an "alt monkey" and an "alt dweeb," verrily was he a LIVE dweeb, and verrily were they about to be dead ones. And Dweebly smileth, for he knew it was good to be a dweeb. And it WAS good.
:-) jedi
Damn, I thought this was the latest Harry Potter Book :(
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I guess this could be called a n00b moment, few nights ago i upped a b25h with the 76mm cannon ( i think thats the size) to go take some tanks and flakers that were invading the town, and out of no where a 262 was 3k out and was heading straight towards me, i guess he was going to HO me, i let him get 1k out and let that cannon go, blew him right out of the sky, i didnt know what this guy was thinking coming at me head on like that, not very smart on his part
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"But alas, St Frank compresseth, and walloweth like yon Holy Hippo above 400 knots."
^-- holy hippo did it for me!