Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: GScholz on January 30, 2014, 07:41:59 AM
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"Joseph Kerr wasn’t prepared when his wife became abusive–and the systems in place to help weren’t ready either."
(http://cdn.goodmenproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/BruisedFace.jpg)
http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/brand-what-do-you-do-when-a-girl-hits-you/
Horrible that a man's service to his country is used against him, and how the justice system is weighted against men in abuse cases like this.
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Try to calm her down, have some rough make up sex, then take her on a fishing trip and report man overboard on ch16 :devil :angel:
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"Joseph Kerr wasn’t prepared when his wife became abusive–and the systems in place to help weren’t ready either."
(http://cdn.goodmenproject.com/wp-content/uploads/2013/08/BruisedFace.jpg)
http://goodmenproject.com/featured-content/brand-what-do-you-do-when-a-girl-hits-you/
Horrible that a man's service to his country is used against him, and how the justice system is weighted against men in abuse cases like this.
That's not a girl hit, that's a MAMA!
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I have scene abusive people first hand, both male and female. What seems to be a factor in the aggressors is caffeine, alcohol, nicotine, fast food diet, or some combination.
From my experiences caffeine seems to be the one which pushes people over the edge very easily.
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What seems to be a factor in the aggressors is caffeine, alcohol, nicotine, fast food diet, or some combination.
Huh? A Big Mac made me beat my wife?
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Huh? A Big Mac made me beat my wife?
It wasn't the Big Mac...it was the Big Gulp of Coke. :lol
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It wasn't the Big Mac...it was the Big Gulp of DIET Coke. :lol
fixed :aok
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So that woman wants to be tough eh? I suggest that she be sent to prison where there'll be plenty of opportunity.
Diet might be a contributing factor, but this? There was something wrong with her from the start.
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Horrible situation, that. I have a buddy who was abused a long time ago. Put simply, the result would have been profoundly different had he been attacked the same way by a man.
He did the same thing though, took it and didn't make a move to defend himself. Fortunately no kids involved so it was relatively simple for him to get out of the situation.
Being in that guy's shoes has got to be one of the most frustrating, enraging situations on earth though.
Wiley.
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Bill Burr thinks we should ask The View for the answer
NOT SAFE FOR WORK!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AlvvCYUDHrQ
NOT SAFE FOR WORK!
I don't know if they'd take the question up though, it doesn't fit their format.
Seriously though, in this guy's case, pressing charges for assault and kidnapping would be a start, at the very least.
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I don't know if they'd take the question up though, it doesn't fit their format.
Seriously though, in this guy's case, pressing charges for assault and kidnapping would be a start, at the very least.
And doesn't generally get very far. :noid
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In this case it got him arrested and barred from seeing his kids.
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I think it has a lot more to do with the way things are in the media. Men are portayed as simple bumblers. Violence against men is glorified in movies and TV. In real life it is cheered. If you try to involve the police you are in for even more woes.
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In this case it got him arrested and barred from seeing his kids.
Released on own recognisance, = no conviction?
His only other options were a) hit her back and b) not do anything, so sucks as it may, he did the right thing. If the $$$ were in a joint account, he's SOL on that one. He also did the right thing by going to a lawyer before she left with the kids - for the court's purposes, nothing happens unless it happens with a lawyer.
I can *cough* guarantee you that it's not always the guy whom the police lead away.
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Pretty awful to read, I feel very sorry for him. He's right too, that's pretty much how L/E deals with it.
When I left my wife back in 2004, I was warned by a police officer that I shot with to transfer all my firearms out of the home prior to giving her the news that I had already rented a new place to live, and was leaving her the house. Here in Canada, keeping your gun license is in your wife or cohabiting partners hands, she has to actually sign your application to "allow" you to have them, and is quite often the first thing the wife's divorce lawyer advises - go after his guns and license, just say you feel threatened and scared, and the police will come and seize them, and take him away! That's literally the word for word advice they give, and what the lawyer told my soon to be X. I told her I was going, then a couple days went by.
Luckily, when she called the government 1 800 number they have specifically for this purpose (yes, that isn't a joke), I just let her go on with them on the phone, explaining that although I'd never once been violent around her, raised a hand, my voice, anything of the sort, me having guns scared her and she felt threatened and thought I might "use" them, after being coached through it in a similar manner to what this guy went through. What a joke. When the police arrived about 15 minutes later, I handed them my friends card, who was a Sargent in another division, and said "I transferred every single weapon and every round of ammunition, and even my pocket knives to his custody 2 weeks ago". I was lucky, having prior warning, I was able to turn it around on my lying X, and it looked very bad on her, and helped in the later dealings. If I hadn't known that was how it usually went, I would have lost everything, 50$k worth of stuff, my job, which was in that business in one way shape or form, as well as all the other legal hassles.
Never having had kids, I can't imagine how awful it must be to have them used against you in a split, or go through what the guy in this article has, but I have some small idea how it feels to be betrayed and lied about by your wife, who is nice as pie one day, then turns into something quite different when life takes a turn she doesn't want or like, and lies to the authorities, especially based on legal council, and it's considered "ok" behavior by some groups to do so, so long as the end result works out in the woman's favor.
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Bill Burr thinks we should ask The View for the answer
NOT SAFE FOR WORK!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=AlvvCYUDHrQ
NOT SAFE FOR WORK!
I don't know if they'd take the question up though, it doesn't fit their format.
Seriously though, in this guy's case, pressing charges for assault and kidnapping would be a start, at the very least.
Bill Burr is a funy mofo
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Someone hits me, I hit them. If I get locked up so be it. I'd rather be locked up and still have my pride and self respect, rather than be free and punked out.
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I don't know with other girls but this is what you should do if she is a french girl.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mLuNEbNYvTg&feature=youtube_gdata_player
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You let them take out there aggression then you smile and offer them kindness. That's how you keep your pride as a man.
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Pretty awful to read, I feel very sorry for him. He's right too, that's pretty much how L/E deals with it.
When I left my wife back in 2004, I was warned by a police officer that I shot with to transfer all my firearms out of the home prior to giving her the news that I had already rented a new place to live, and was leaving her the house. Here in Canada, keeping your gun license is in your wife or cohabiting partners hands, she has to actually sign your application to "allow" you to have them, and is quite often the first thing the wife's divorce lawyer advises - go after his guns and license, just say you feel threatened and scared, and the police will come and seize them, and take him away! That's literally the word for word advice they give, and what the lawyer told my soon to be X. I told her I was going, then a couple days went by.
Luckily, when she called the government 1 800 number they have specifically for this purpose (yes, that isn't a joke), I just let her go on with them on the phone, explaining that although I'd never once been violent around her, raised a hand, my voice, anything of the sort, me having guns scared her and she felt threatened and thought I might "use" them, after being coached through it in a similar manner to what this guy went through. What a joke. When the police arrived about 15 minutes later, I handed them my friends card, who was a Sargent in another division, and said "I transferred every single weapon and every round of ammunition, and even my pocket knives to his custody 2 weeks ago". I was lucky, having prior warning, I was able to turn it around on my lying X, and it looked very bad on her, and helped in the later dealings. If I hadn't known that was how it usually went, I would have lost everything, 50$k worth of stuff, my job, which was in that business in one way shape or form, as well as all the other legal hassles.
Never having had kids, I can't imagine how awful it must be to have them used against you in a split, or go through what the guy in this article has, but I have some small idea how it feels to be betrayed and lied about by your wife, who is nice as pie one day, then turns into something quite different when life takes a turn she doesn't want or like, and lies to the authorities, especially based on legal council, and it's considered "ok" behavior by some groups to do so, so long as the end result works out in the woman's favor.
Knowing that, another option would be to sell all the guns, ammo, and knives before telling the wife.
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You let them take out there aggression then you smile and offer them kindness. That's how you keep your pride as a man.
That's exactly what you do.... :aok
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Am I the only one who disagrees?
I have never, ever, raised a hand to a woman. Ever. Well...as long as pillow fights don't count anyway.
However.....some bird attacks me with a baseball bat and she's getting it stuck where the sun don't shine. If she's lucky it'll be thin end first.
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I'm firmly in the nobody should be hitting anybody camp.
I read a study once (wish I could find that link again) that showed over 50% of the time the first violent contact in domestic abuse cases was from the female. You want to get in an endless argument bring this up in a mixed group. The study wasn't about who came off the worse, who felt threatened... it was solely about who crossed the line and hit first. But people are so ready to dismiss it because it doesn't fit the narrative of who the powerless victim is.
Whenever I see groups purporting to wanting to end DV, or to help DV victims but focused solely on one gender I figure they have zero chance of achieving that goal.
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You let them take out there aggression then you smile and offer them kindness. That's how you keep your pride as a man.
That sounds real good on paper but you've never met my sister. She's a little bitty thing but I learned several decades ago that I was better off knocking her out early or else I would get hurt. If you smile and offer her kindness when she's pissed you'll be doing it with a tooth gone.
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walk away.
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walk away.
From your kids?
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That sounds real good on paper but you've never met my sister. She's a little bitty thing but I learned several decades ago that I was better off knocking her out early or else I would get hurt. If you smile and offer her kindness when she's pissed you'll be doing it with a tooth gone.
It is good in real life, not just on paper. It's worked for me on more than one occasion. But no, I have not met your sister.
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I made up two jokes. If you ever hit me and I find out about it.....I will use dirty words on you! I guess it aint assault iv if it don't hurt.
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It all depends. What is worrysome is reflexes, most of all if you have boxed or taken some kind of martial art. Ive never had a typical smaller woman swing at me but Ive had a few spit on me. During an altercation I had some big fat west side momma punch me right in the mouth and "Bam" before I knew it I had hit her with a left jab and floored her. Luckily she was just stunned.
Hitting woman is the last thing any real man should want to do. I find intentional woman beaters despicable creatures.
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I'd pull a shamwow vince and give her a shamPOW right in the kisser.
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"What do you do when a girl hits you?"
Hit her back, men and women are equal after all.
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The police and courts won't care who did what, when they did it, or who was first. If you hit they'll find you guilty of domestic battery. If you only restrained the person in defense, that is still technically battery. The only defense that may get you off the hook, if you take it to trial, is when they ask "did you ever hit her" you can honestly answer "no".
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In my State he should have called the police to his home right after it happened, If he looked like that and there were no marks on her, she would have been hauled off to jail. He lost control when he left the house.
shamus
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"What do you do when a girl hits you?"
Hit her back, men and women are equal after all.
:aok
She better be able to take what she can give. The law is so full of crap, which is pretty obvious. But I'll leave it at that.
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You let them take out there aggression then you smile and offer them kindness. That's how you keep your pride as a man.
The moon is made of cheese as well :rofl
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return to the group of guys who told me "what's the worst she could do, say no?" and show them the foot print on my face.
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i know from first hand experience exactly what that guy went through...in the u.s. unless you have video, multiple witnesses including cops and a dozen priests, if she says she is afraid of you, it's you in the jail cell before your black eye heals.
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Within a relationship I would just walk out of the door if the girl got violent. Give her a chance to calm down and try to work things out later.
If it happened a second time that would be the end of the relationship - obviously not meant to be.
Outside of a relationship, I would like to think I'd treat a girl who hit me in pretty much the same way I would treat a man.
Have seen quite a few men get battered by drunk girls because they were too gentlemanly (or too scared of that girl's male friends) to retaliate :/
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Within a relationship I would just walk out of the door if the girl got violent. Give her a chance to calm down and try to work things out later.
can't do that when she's blocking the door or has you by a handful of hair in one hand and hitting you with the other...and don't go to sleep in the house, she can stage all sorts of things while she's calling 911.
Outside of a relationship, I would like to think I'd treat a girl who hit me in pretty much the same way I would treat a man.
what's really funny is in some states, outside of a domestic situation, if the woman hits you first, you can get away with self defense.
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can't do that when she's blocking the door or has you by a handful of hair in one hand and hitting you with the other...
Honestly, the kind of woman that is strong enough to hold me in place like that, without me being able to gently disentangle myself, is the kind of monstrous hambeast that I would never go out with :D
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This:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sz-Lzu01olY (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sz-Lzu01olY)
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Gemini, I don't think it's a matter of manner or of fear, its a matter of male pride.
First off, how did you let a girl hit you? Maybe a sucker punch once but after that? Male pride dictates that I will not admit that someone else was faster or smarter than me.
Secondly, how much does it really hurt? Male pride dictates that even though we failed to avoid being hit we must not admit that the punch hurt us. Smiling and showing no effect from the punch solves this primal dominance problem. Showing pain or admitting that you were hurt by retaliating is a failure for male pride.
A man never hits a woman. Not because he is too kind but because he is too proud to be admit he would need to.
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Gemini, I don't think it's a matter of manner or of fear, its a matter of male pride.
First off, how did you let a girl hit you? Maybe a sucker punch once but after that? Male pride dictates that I will not admit that someone else was faster or smarter than me.
Secondly, how much does it really hurt? Male pride dictates that even though we failed to avoid being hit we must not admit that the punch hurt us. Smiling and showing no effect from the punch solves this primal dominance problem. Showing pain or admitting that you were hurt by retaliating is a failure for male pride.
A man never hits a woman. Not because he is too kind but because he is too proud to be admit he would need to.
I guess I either don't have enough male pride, or I am too much of a feminist or something :)
I'm totally prepared to admit that a woman is capable of physically hurting me. I'm also enough of a vindictive b***ard that I would want to payback with interest someone who hit me, regardless of their gender.
Probably just my own perspective, but I really think it's important not to let people take advantage of you. If you let yourself get smacked by a chick but let it slide because of 'male pride', she is going to think she can do that to you again with impunity.
And anyone else that witnesses it is going to form some kind of opinion of you based on that as well - although of course, that may be a good thing! "What a decent guy, she socked him in the face and he just walked away". But for me personally, I'd rather not display weakness and instead assert my desire for equality ;> Act like a b***h get smacked like a b***h.
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I see your angle and it's fair enough. But why not just avoid her swings and make her look silly? That would win more respect than breaking her jaw. I'm not a big guy but I know that my 185lbs frame is easily going to break bones if I punch a woman. That is not equality. That is using my physical advantage with no responsibility. Equality in that situation would only arise if the woman in question was the same size and body fat ratio as me with an abnormally strong skull for a female.
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I see your angle and it's fair enough. But why not just avoid her swings and make her look silly? That would win more respect than breaking her jaw. I'm not a big guy but I know that my 185lbs frame is easily going to break bones if I punch a woman. That is not equality. That is using my physical advantage with no responsibility. Equality in that situation would only arise if the woman in question was the same size and body fat ratio as me with an abnormally strong skull for a female.
I guess a lot depends on the context of the specific situation. If the person attacking you (male or female) poses no real threat then obviously that is going to affect and temper your reaction.
And no, it's not equality to use your superior build and strength to hurt a woman...but neither is it equality for a woman to be free to hit a man without any fear of being hit back.
This is all kind of academic anyway batfink, as we are both such wonderful chaps that no woman would ever want to assault us :angel:
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so far it seems Bat has it the right of way :aok
I remember a fight with the wife....
she swings at me I slap her hand out of the air....
she swings again....I do the same thing....
she flips and starts throwing heymakers...each one I smack out of the air...
holy crap did that piss her off :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
I would tell you about mine and my wife's relationship...I actually started to...but....ehhh
lets just say...it was extremely screwed up....I was screwed up(thats not to say I am NOT screwed up anymore....just less so)...she was screwed up....how we are still together after 20 years is beyond me...
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I guess a lot depends on the context of the specific situation. If the person attacking you (male or female) poses no real threat then obviously that is going to affect and temper your reaction.
And no, it's not equality to use your superior build and strength to hurt a woman...but neither is it equality for a woman to be free to hit a man without any fear of being hit back.
This is all kind of academic anyway batfink, as we are both such wonderful chaps that no woman would ever want to assault us :angel:
:D I can't argue with that
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I'm 6'1, 185 pounds, with a background in amateur boxing. I doubt very many men could hit me, let alone a woman...and if a woman DID hit me I doubt it would hurt.
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I'm 6'1, 185 pounds, with a background in amateur boxing. I doubt very many men could hit me, let alone a woman...and if a woman DID hit me I doubt it would hurt.
i used to be very well acquainted with a couple of women that could hit you and it would definitely hurt. :D
I guess I either don't have enough male pride, or I am too much of a feminist or something :)
I'm totally prepared to admit that a woman is capable of physically hurting me. I'm also enough of a vindictive b***ard that I would want to payback with interest someone who hit me, regardless of their gender.
Probably just my own perspective, but I really think it's important not to let people take advantage of you. If you let yourself get smacked by a chick but let it slide because of 'male pride', she is going to think she can do that to you again with impunity.
And anyone else that witnesses it is going to form some kind of opinion of you based on that as well - although of course, that may be a good thing! "What a decent guy, she socked him in the face and he just walked away". But for me personally, I'd rather not display weakness and instead assert my desire for equality ;> Act like a b***h get smacked like a b***h.
it's not about male pride or what other people might or might not think of you. it's about not being labeled as a woman beater. and that is where the problem lies. there are and have been so many abusive men that get their rocks off on beating someone that cannot strike back that when the roles are reversed, the woman is viewed as the victim, in spite of the evidence. a man has to have very strong irrefutable evidence to show he was the one that was attacked. all a woman has to do is make a claim of battery. what's more is if the woman injures herself while attacking a man, all she has to do is tell the police they were defensive injuries caused by the man...instant jail time and a criminal conviction for the man.
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and if a woman DID hit me I doubt it would hurt.
Unless she kicked you in the nuts.
ack-ack
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Its about not getting pinched is what its about. I imagine every jurisdiction is a little different but we adopted a very strict procedure in the last 5 years.
1st off a SGT has to show up, which takes away the play we used to have in these things. If there is a threat of violence someone has to pack a bag and guess who? Think it will be Mommy or Daddy watching late night on a 12" B&W at the local flea bag? If there is an injury, and almost all are on the girl, there is an arrest whether she signs the complaint or not and an auto-stay at County for three days. All the firearms get confiscated as well. And good luck getting them back in this place.
When it comes to Domestics the system is NOT fair. What can I tell you? There are more female voters then male. And they live longer.
Ive often had to pinch the guy even tho I knew the girl was in the wrong. Or at least was the svengali in the entire thing. I know plenty of coppers who have been screwed by the system in these things and I have plenty of compassion for those caught in them. My advice is keep your hands in your pants, find another place to live, and call a lawyer. Your kids will always be yours and there is a brighter day coming. If she starts swinging at you call 911.
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I'm 6'1, 185 pounds, with a background in amateur boxing. I doubt very many men could hit me, let alone a woman...and if a woman DID hit me I doubt it would hurt.
Sounds like a challenge. ;)
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i used to be very well acquainted with a couple of women that could hit you and it would definitely hurt. :D
....
the woman I mentioned would pick him up and use him like a dildo.... :rofl
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the woman I mentioned would pick him up and use him like a dildo.... :rofl
dammit Ink!!! water exiting the sinuses, not good... :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
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dammit Ink!!! water exiting the sinuses, not good... :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl :rofl
:rofl :rofl
:D :cheers:
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the woman I mentioned would pick him up and use him like a dildo.... :rofl
LOL!
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(http://i441.photobucket.com/albums/qq137/ChuckTheRipperIsDoingYourMom/166k7ir.jpg)
I would probably hit her.
And punch her back if she hit me.
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I think this is the best course of action!
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=VclaeaajDiU
No good deed goes unpunished!
:salute
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(http://i441.photobucket.com/albums/qq137/ChuckTheRipperIsDoingYourMom/166k7ir.jpg)
I would probably hit her.
And punch her back if she hit me.
Momma didn't warn me about girls like that! :eek:
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(http://i441.photobucket.com/albums/qq137/ChuckTheRipperIsDoingYourMom/166k7ir.jpg)
I would probably hit her.
And punch her back if she hit me.
She'd probably break you in half. :lol
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(http://i441.photobucket.com/albums/qq137/ChuckTheRipperIsDoingYourMom/166k7ir.jpg)
I would probably hit her.
And punch her back if she hit me.
Outside of that being an obvious photoshop, you'd be punching air lying on your back and counting stars lol.