Aces High Bulletin Board
General Forums => The O' Club => Topic started by: Busher on February 15, 2016, 08:19:07 PM
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Some doctors need to be just a little more specific with us older folks!!!
The other day I went over to a nearby CVS Store.
When I got there, I went straight to the back of the store to where the Pharmacy counter is located,
took out my little brown bottle along with a teaspoon and laid them both on the counter.
The pharmacist came over, smiled and asked if he could help me.
I said "yes, could you please taste this for me?"
Being that I am a senior citizen, I guess the pharmacist just went along with me.
He picked up the spoon and put a tiny bit of the liquid on his tongue and swilled it around.
Then with a stomach-churning look on his face, he spat out on the floor and began coughing.
When he was finally finished making all those weird faces, I looked him in right in the eyes and asked,
"Now,does that taste sweet to you?"
The pharmacist, shaking his head back & forth with a venomous look in his eyes yelled "HELL NO!"
So I said, "Oh, thank God! That's a relief! My doctor told me to get a pharmacist to test my urine for sugar!"
Well, I can never go back to that CVS but I really don't care though because they aren't very friendly there anyway!
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cabnt typ
laguing to hard
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try getting your hemorrhoids checked by the doctor you cheated on 10 years before.
semp
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The title is erroneous!
In today's world with cameras in every innocent looking device a juvenile would never have been able to perform that prank. Anyone having seen funny videos either on TV or the Internet would have been very, very suspicious. You'd have to look senile to succeed in that! :old:
May the rest of your life be be filled with tricks as cheerful as this one. And don't forget to report here!
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While getting old does indeed sux, it doesn't sux quite as hard as not getting old.
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LOL Bushy! Stealing that! :old:
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While getting old does indeed sux, it doesn't sux quite as hard as not getting old.
Not getting old sucks how? :headscratch:
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Not getting old sucks how? :headscratch:
Not getting old means you're dead, generally speaking.
Wiley.
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I've got 3 pieces of advice for getting old:
1. Never pass up a chance to pee.
2. Never waste an erection.
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Fifth piece of advice...make sure your sack is out of the way before you sit down on the toilet..
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I've got 3 pieces of advice for getting old:
1. Never pass up a chance to pee.
2. Never waste an erection.
and never trust a Fart!
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More adivce
Pull your pants down before going to the bathroom, not go to the bathroom then pull the pants down
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and never trust a Fart!
And "Shart" means you automatically send yourself home.
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try getting your hemorrhoids checked by the doctor you cheated on 10 years before.
semp
At least he was familiar with that part of your body :D
Sorry, couldn't resist :O
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The older I get the more angry I get at nonsense :old:
People knocking on my door starting a conversation saying they are not trying to sell me something.
People knocking on my door saying they can save me is also a bit poo as well.
Imagine if I knocked on a strangers door and asked if they wanted to talk about coat hangers?
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That is actually how they used to test for glucose in urine.
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That is actually how they used to test for glucose in urine.
Madonna drinks were because she is weirdo and falls of steps :old:
Brooke said it will law in the future :old:
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At least he was familiar with that part of your body :D
Sorry, couldn't resist :O
it was a female doctor and the medical assistance that was there is the one I cheated on the doctor with. then I cheated on the medical assistant with my gf. or maybe I cheated on my gf with both the ma and the doctor.
semp
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it was a female doctor and the medical assistance that was there is the one I cheated on the doctor with. then I cheated on the medical assistant with my gf. or maybe I cheated on my gf with both the ma and the doctor.
semp
That's oedipal!
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Madonna drinks were because she is weirdo and falls of steps :old:
Yeah, but she drinks it right from the tap.
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and never trust a Fart!
^^^^this^^^^^
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Imagine if I knocked on a strangers door and asked if they wanted to talk about coat hangers?
Wood, plastic or metal? Could be relevant. :old:
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and never trust a Fart!
:rofl :rofl
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Wood, plastic or metal? Could be relevant. :old:
Shut it!
You know plastic is a myth like Dinosaurs
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What about the hangers with the twisty hook that are BOTH metal and plastic?
Sorcery!
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hangers made out of metal and cardboard.
semp
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Too funny , lol .
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Too funny , lol .
you must have done what I used to do. get the cardboard tube from the hanger, put a hole in it, some foil paper and you have a pipe, to smoke your good stuff.
once the good stuff kicked in then you get the metal part and make animal shapes.
semp
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you must have done what I used to do. get the cardboard tube from the hanger, put a hole in it, some foil paper and you have a pipe, to smoke your good stuff.
once the good stuff kicked in then you get the metal part and make animal shapes.
semp
Don't be telling every one , LOL !!
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A couple in their nineties were both having problems remembering things. During a checkup, their doctor told them that they were physically healthy, but suggested they might write things down to help them remember.
Later that night, while watching TV, the old man got up from his chair. “Want anything while I'm in the kitchen?" he asked.
"Will you get me a bowl of ice cream?"
“Sure."
"Don't you think you should write it down so you can remember it?" she asked.
"No, I can remember it."
"Well, I'd like some strawberries on top, too. Maybe you should write it down, so's not to forget it?"
He said, "I can remember that. You want a bowl of ice cream with strawberries."
"I'd also like whipped cream. I'm certain you'll forget that, write it down?" she asked.
Irritated, he said, "I don't need to write it down, I can remember it! Ice cream with strawberries and whipped cream - I got it, for goodness sake!" Then he toddled into the kitchen.
After about 20 minutes, the old man returned from the kitchen and handed his wife a plate of bacon and eggs. She stared at the plate for a moment.
"Where's my toast?"
- oldman
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I've got 3 pieces of advice for getting old:
1. Never pass up a chance to pee.
2. Never waste an erection.
Ain't this the truth :devil
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hangers made out of metal and cardboard.
semp
You forgot plastic
:bolt:
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Bran muffins
A couple were both 85 years old, and had been married for sixty years. Though they were far from rich, they managed to live a good life because they watched their pennies.
Though not young as they would like, they were both in very good health, largely due to the wife's insistence on healthy foods and exercise during the last several decades.
One day, their good health could not save them, when they went on a rare vacation and they were both killed in a terrible auto accident, sending them off to Heaven.
As they reached the pearly gates, St. Peter escorted them inside. He took them to a beautiful mansion, furnished in gold and fine silks, with a fully stocked kitchen and a waterfall in the master bath. A maid could be seen hanging their favorite clothes in the closet.
They gasped in astonishment when St. Peter said, "Welcome to Heaven. This will be your home now."
The old man asked Peter how much all this was going to cost.
"Why, nothing," Peter replied, "Remember, this is your reward in Heaven."
The old man looked out the window and there he saw a beautiful championship golf course, better then anything he had seen on Earth.
"What are the greens fees?" grumbled the old man.
"This is heaven," St. Peter replied, "You can play for free, every day."
Next they went to the clubhouse and saw the lavish buffet lunch, with every imaginable cuisine laid out before them, from seafood to steaks to exotic deserts, and free flowing beverages.
" Don 't even ask," said St. Peter to the man, "This is Heaven, it is all free for you to enjoy."
The old man looked around and glanced nervously at his wife.
"Well, where are the low fat and low cholesterol foods, and the decaffeinated tea?," he asked. "That's the best part," St. Peter replied, "You can eat and drink as much as you like of whatever you like, and you will never get fat or sick. This is Heaven!"
The old man then ask, "No gym to work out at?" "Not unless you want to," was the answer.
"No testing my sugar or blood pressure or.." "Never again. All you do here is enjoy yourself."
The old man glared at his wife and said, "You and your frickin' bran muffins. We could have been here ten years ago!"