Anyone with a background in engineering or physics would disagree with you on your first point. The math of the dynamics is the same.
As for the second point, regardless of any analysis of the physics of the situation (which I am very comfortable with), there are lots of quotes from 109 pilots about the slats popping open. Do you have any descriptions on the slats moving gradually, or is that your own feeling that they should?
My engineering background ended 10 years ago. The problem with your analogy is that is momentum, which is why I believe it to be irrelevant, the aero dynamics involved are missing.
Yes pilots do mention the pop, but it's always the same, during combat. In combat the pilots pushed the plane around reducing the air pressure dramatically.
Either way, as I said, it should absolutely be possible to gently deploy the slats in flight, which it isn't in the realm of AcesHigh.
Have you ever seen the film of the slats being maintained? There's a chap sliding them.
Have you seen a film of the slats in a wind tunnel? They don't just pop out when tilted.