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Author Topic: XENONAUTS!  (Read 1428 times)

Offline FLOOB

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #15 on: July 14, 2014, 04:05:07 AM »
The secret to base assaults is to assault them when they're new. If you assault them when they're new they're just defended by robots. When I assaulted the oldest alien base it was defended by the smart aliens and those damn mind controlling blue ant-headed bastards.

The fact that everyone was crapping their pants about how good Enemy Unknown was when it came out is just indicative of how low our expectations of computer games have become I think.
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Offline FLOOB

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #16 on: July 14, 2014, 10:46:04 AM »
Pray for mojo.
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“Montana seems to me to be what a small boy would think Texas is like from hearing Texans” - John Steinbeck

Offline Volron

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #17 on: July 14, 2014, 12:10:57 PM »
Quote from: FLOOB on July 14, 2014, 10:46:04 AM
Pray for mojo.
(Image removed from quote.)

 :rofl

Well, at least I'm not an Assault.  I see what will happen:  1) I'm going to take a shot, miss so badly that I may as well saved the alien the ammo and shot myself. 2) The alien is gonna spatter my spleen on a wall in the reaction fire.  IF I survive: 3) I'm going to proceed to soil myself. 4) Alien going to finish "helping" me out of my dilemma.

 :noid
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Quote from: hitech
Wow I find it hard to believe it has been almost 38 days since our last path. We should have release another 38 versions by now  :bhead
HiTech
Quote from: Pyro
Quote from: Jolly
What on Earth makes you think that i said that sir?!
My guess would be scotch.

Offline FLOOB

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #18 on: July 15, 2014, 04:47:43 AM »
Attempting to retreat from the bridge of a downed alien carrier ship, hemorrhaging from serious wounds, Private Zerstorer was fatally shot in the back by a blue alien android. His cremated remains will be shipped back to his home of record in East Germany. His next of kin have been informed that he died in helicopter crash on a mission to rescue lost girl scouts. Had PVT. Zerstorer been in better shape he may have survived, he only had 36 TUs. Something to think about next time you're whining about physical training.

PVT MK84 has been promoted to corporal.

PVT Volron has been promoted to corporal.

PVT SOL75 has been promoted to corporal.

CPL Floob has been awarded the Order of Gallantry

A moment of silence for PVT Zerstorer..
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“Montana seems to me to be what a small boy would think Texas is like from hearing Texans” - John Steinbeck

Offline FLOOB

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #19 on: July 15, 2014, 05:12:43 AM »
Our personnel files.




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“Montana seems to me to be what a small boy would think Texas is like from hearing Texans” - John Steinbeck

Offline Zerstorer

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #20 on: July 15, 2014, 07:15:41 AM »
Quote from: FLOOB on July 15, 2014, 04:47:43 AM
Attempting to retreat from the bridge of a downed alien carrier ship, hemorrhaging from serious wounds, Private Zerstorer was fatally shot in the back by a blue alien android. His cremated remains will be shipped back to his home of record in East Germany.

....

A moment of silence for PVT Zerstorer..

 :cry
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The Once and Former Fulcrum

In my experience, nothing is ever what it seems to be, but everything is exactly what it is.

Offline Volron

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #21 on: July 15, 2014, 11:17:23 AM »
In Soviet Germany, TU's train YOU!  Zerstorer did not understand this.  He paid price.  Mother/Fatherland will miss Comrade. :salute
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Quote from: hitech
Wow I find it hard to believe it has been almost 38 days since our last path. We should have release another 38 versions by now  :bhead
HiTech
Quote from: Pyro
Quote from: Jolly
What on Earth makes you think that i said that sir?!
My guess would be scotch.

Offline FLOOB

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #22 on: July 15, 2014, 03:58:00 PM »
Latest mission: Carrier interception.
Congratulations are in order for CPL MK84. CPL MK84 is hereby awarded the Military Cross for eliminating five enemy in a single mission. CPL MK84 has demonstrated courage and dedication on the field of battle. His actions reflect great credit upon himself and the Xenonauts organisation. CPL MK84 has also earned the Order of Gallantry.

CPL FLOOB has been promoted to sergeant, despite accidentally shooting and killing a local policeman at the crash site.

CPL Volron, CPL MK84 and SGT Floob will be convalescing in the medical center for some time. Their wounds were not deemed severe enough to warrant a Crimson Heart.

Your personel files will be updated.
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“Montana seems to me to be what a small boy would think Texas is like from hearing Texans” - John Steinbeck

Offline FLOOB

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #23 on: July 15, 2014, 04:00:36 PM »




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“Montana seems to me to be what a small boy would think Texas is like from hearing Texans” - John Steinbeck

Offline Volron

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #24 on: July 17, 2014, 12:22:56 AM »
It was in my report that policeman "fell" in front of CPL Floob's bullet while he was in action against alien threat.  Such is report in Soviet Germany.  As for Crimson Heart, if command deems it not award-able, then one will not complain. :salute
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Quote from: hitech
Wow I find it hard to believe it has been almost 38 days since our last path. We should have release another 38 versions by now  :bhead
HiTech
Quote from: Pyro
Quote from: Jolly
What on Earth makes you think that i said that sir?!
My guess would be scotch.

Offline FLOOB

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #25 on: July 17, 2014, 01:55:37 PM »
Mission: Battleship interception.
CPL SOL75 was killed in action inside an alien battleship. He was part of a five man breaching team, while standing next to a teleport pad a Reaper suddenly materialized on the teleport pad and impregnated CPL SOL75.

CPL Volron was killed in action inside an alien battleship. He was among the four surviving members of the breaching team. While clearing the bridge of the alien battleship he was cut down by Sebillian plasma weapons. Fellow operatives attempted to give medical aid but it was too late.

CPL MK84 has been promoted to sergeant. CPL MK84 has also been awarded the Order of Merit.

SGT FLOOB has been awarded the Order of Merit.

This mission has provided us with a singularity core from the alien battleship, a critical piece of equipment that we now possess. Due in no small part to the actions of CPL Volron and CPL SOL75.

A moment of silence for CPL SOL75 and CPL Volron..
<cue bagpipes>
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“Montana seems to me to be what a small boy would think Texas is like from hearing Texans” - John Steinbeck

Offline MK-84

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #26 on: July 17, 2014, 07:08:03 PM »
Quote from: FLOOB on July 15, 2014, 04:00:36 PM
(Image removed from quote.)
(Image removed from quote.)
(Image removed from quote.)
(Image removed from quote.)


Hey! I am MUCH better looking than that!!!!!  :rofl

I'm recruiting pvt Floob now, lets all wish him the best. The average Xenonaut has a life expectancy of about 3 missions.
« Last Edit: July 17, 2014, 07:11:09 PM by MK-84 »
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Offline MK-84

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #27 on: July 17, 2014, 07:08:50 PM »
My GAWD this game is hard...on the regular difficulty setting :confused:
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Offline Schen

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #28 on: July 19, 2014, 06:23:55 PM »
 :banana:
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"Fighting in the air is not sport. It is scientific murder"
           Captain Edward V. 'Eddie' Rickenbacker

   ---Committing scientific murder since tour 157---
                       :devil

Offline Volron

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Re: XENONAUTS!
« Reply #29 on: July 20, 2014, 09:31:17 PM »
*from the beyond*

I think I bent my wookie... :bhead
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Quote from: hitech
Wow I find it hard to believe it has been almost 38 days since our last path. We should have release another 38 versions by now  :bhead
HiTech
Quote from: Pyro
Quote from: Jolly
What on Earth makes you think that i said that sir?!
My guess would be scotch.
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