That's a "Dexter's Laboratory" reference, for those who didn't catch it. So first, thanks very much to the AKs for letting me join in the FSO fun last Friday. Appreciated the invite. So, I'm flying Allies, in a F4F, two droptanks and 50% fuel; the "Slot" map. We're launching from A4; we all jump to the runway, and I reach around my throttle to flip the engine start switch on my TM Warthog. Great piece of gear, with about a gazillion buttons, levers, switches, etc.
Nothing happens. Now, I should mention that I'd been out of AH for a while (like, over a year), and hadn't remapped any of my buttons. I realize I flipped the wrong toggle switch, and reaching a little further back, I find the right one and get the engine running. We head roughly north to set up a fighter picket line west of our nearest CV, C57.
We climb out to around 20K, and spend the next 30 minutes or so drilling holes in the sky, looking for the Japanese. I check my E6B early into the flight to see how much endurance I have (plenty), and don't give it any more thought. I'm concentrating furiously on staying in formation while scanning the skies. I'm eager to show how professional I am, and show the AKs how well this retired USAF dude can hang with them.
Finally, calls of "Tally Ho" ring out. Arrayed 6 or 7 thousand feet below us is a formation of a dozen or more Ki-43's, motoring along fat, dumb, and happy. "Jettison tanks", our flight leader calls. I comply instantly, and push over into a dive with the rest of our group. Seconds later, through the roar of the wind screaming past my canopy, comes the unmistakable sound of my radial engine sputtering to a halt, the propeller quickly slowing. A glance down at my fuel gauge tells the tail...I am out of gas! I make one half-hearted gun pass at a Ki, which nimbly jinks out of the way, and just continue on down, aiming for a nearby island's white sand beach. I flop unceremoniously into the water just shy of the beach, bobbing up and down in the surf. "How the H E double-hockey-sticks did this happen?" I ask myself. I radio that I'm out of gas and down. The comments are mercifully sympathetic, though a few chuckles managed to find their way through the radio static.
Back in the tower, I try to figure out what happened. I don't even remember what key stroke is used for manual fuel tank switching, and don't remember hitting any keys that weren't part of a radio message. So, I painstakingly go through the switches one by one on my joystick and throttle, in the "map controllers". Finally, I find it; there it is, the toggle switch just above the engine start switch! The one I accidentally hit when trying to start my engine.
Proving an old adage I just made up: "You're never too old to be a rookie!" Ah, well...there's always Jet Week.
