Author Topic: A fun email I recieved today.  (Read 2345 times)

Offline hitech

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A fun email I recieved today.
« on: January 26, 2004, 02:45:50 PM »
AIRWORTHY SAYINGS

Keep the aeroplane in such an attitude that the air pressure is directly in
the pilot's face.
- Horatio C. Barber, 1916

When a flight is proceeding incredibly well, something was forgotten.
-Robert Livingston, 'Flying The Aeronca'

The only time an aircraft has too much fuel on board is when it is on fire.
- Sir Charles Kingsford Smith, sometime before his death in the 1920's

Just remember, if you crash because of weather your funeral will be held on
a sunny day.
- Layton A. Bennett

I hope you either take up parachute jumping or stay out of single-motored
airplanes at night.
- Charles A. Lindbergh, to Wiley Post, 1931

Never fly the 'A' model of anything.
- Ed Thompson

Never fly anything that doesn't have the paint worn off the Rudder Pedals.
- Harry Bill

Keep thy airspeed up, less the earth come from below and smite thee.
- William Kershner

Instrument flying is when your mind gets a grip on the fact that there is
vision beyond sight.
- U.S. Navy 'Approach' magazine circa W.W.II.

The Cub is the safest airplane in the world; it can just barely kill you.
Attributed to Max Stanley, Northrop test pilot

If you're faced with a forced landing, fly the thing as far into the crash
as possible.
- Bob Hoover

It occurred to me that if I did not handle the crash correctly, there would
be no survivors.
Richard Leakey, after engine failure in a single engine aircraft.
Nairobi, Africa, 1993.

If an airplane is still in one piece, don't cheat on it. Ride the bastard
down.
- Ernest K. Gann,

Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death I Shall Fear No Evil For I am at
80,000 feet and Climbing.
Sign over the entrance to SR-71 operations,
Kadena AB Okinawa

You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.
- Paul F. Crickmore,

The emergencies you train for almost never happen. It's the one you can't
train for that kills you.
- Ernest K. Gann, advice from the 'old pelican'

Never fly in the same cockpit with someone braver than you.
- Richard Herman Jr., 'Firebreak'

There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.
- Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ, 1972.

An airplane might disappoint any pilot but it'll never surprise a good one
- Len Morgan

To most people, the sky is the limit. To those who love aviation, the sky is
home.

The three best things in life are a good landing, a good orgasm, and a good
bowel movement. The night carrier landing is one of the few opportunities in
life to experience all three at the same time.

A DC-9 captain trainee attempting to check out on the 'glass cockpit' of an
A-320: "Now I know what a dog feels like watching TV."

It only takes two things to fly -- airspeed and money.

What is the similarity between air traffic controllers and pilots?
If a pilot screws up, the pilot dies.
If ATC screws up, the pilot dies.

It's better to break ground and head into the wind than to break wind and
head into the ground.

The difference between flight attendants and jet engines is that the
engine usually quits whining when it gets to the gate.

A copilot is a knot-head until he spots opposite direction traffic at 12
o'clock, after which he's a goof-off for not seeing it sooner.

Without ammunition the USAF would be just another expensive flying club.

If something hasn't broken on your helicopter, it's about to.

I give that landing a 9 . . . on the Richter scale.

Unknown landing signal officer to carrier pilot after his 6th unsuccessful
landing attempt:
"You've got to land here son, this is where the food is."

 

HiTech

Offline Jackal1

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #1 on: January 26, 2004, 02:57:26 PM »
Great stuff. My fav is the one concerning the night carrier landing. ;)
Democracy is two wolves deciding on what to eat. Freedom is a well armed sheep protesting the vote.
------------------------------------------------------------------

Offline acepilot2

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #2 on: January 26, 2004, 03:12:36 PM »
:rofl :lol


That's a great email, and it is all so true.

Offline Virage

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my fav...
« Reply #3 on: January 26, 2004, 03:26:22 PM »
You've never been lost until you've been lost at Mach 3.
- Paul F. Crickmore
JG11

Vater

Offline Octavius

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #4 on: January 26, 2004, 04:40:21 PM »
"Keep thy airspeed up, less the earth come from below and smite thee."
- William Kershner


lol, sounds like that could be a line from Monty Python's Search for the Holy Grail. :D
octavius
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Offline B17Skull12

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #5 on: January 26, 2004, 05:45:39 PM »
:lol :rofl
good stuff.
II/JG3 DGS II

Offline Blammo

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Re: A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #6 on: January 26, 2004, 05:56:50 PM »
I like this one.  Sounds like me...

Quote
Originally posted by hitech
Unknown landing signal officer to carrier pilot after his 6th unsuccessful
landing attempt:
"You've got to land here son, this is where the food is."
BLAMM0 - FACTA, NON VERBA!

Offline RTR

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #7 on: January 26, 2004, 07:42:06 PM »
If you want to fly on only half a tank of fuel, fly on the top half.

Flying is man's second greatest thrill.....Landing is the first.
The Damned

Offline empty

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #8 on: January 26, 2004, 08:51:17 PM »
Great Stuff.  Reminds something an old-timer I used to fly with said (a lot),

"Three things every pilot needs sooner or later, the runway behind him, the gas on the ground and the air above him."

My thanks to him,

Offline NUKE

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Re: A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #9 on: January 26, 2004, 09:42:04 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by hitech
AIRWORTHY SAYINGS

Though I Fly Through the Valley of Death I Shall Fear No Evil For I am at
80,000 feet and Climbing.
Sign over the entrance to SR-71 operations,
Kadena AB Okinawa


There is no reason to fly through a thunderstorm in peacetime.
- Sign over squadron ops desk at Davis-Monthan AFB, AZ, 1972.

 

HiTech


These are my two favorites :)

The second quote gets me due to the Az t-storms during monsoon season.

Offline sax

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #10 on: January 26, 2004, 11:59:30 PM »
Need to stick a few of those rules in the hanger or at least in the AH begginers handbook.
Fun read:)

Offline bigsky

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #11 on: January 27, 2004, 10:00:54 AM »
i still remember a couple:
 when you are in a twin engined plane and one engine dies the remaining engine will always have enough power to get you to the crash site.
 there will alway be more airplanes in the ocean than submarines in the sky.
"I am moist like bacon"

Offline Rude

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #12 on: January 27, 2004, 10:09:54 AM »
My dad was fond of this one....


Quote
The probability of survival is inversely proportional to the angle of arrival. Large angle of arrival, small probability of survival and vice versa.

Offline Vermillion

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A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #13 on: January 27, 2004, 11:16:48 AM »
Love it ! Keep em coming guys :)

Offline beet1e

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Re: A fun email I recieved today.
« Reply #14 on: January 27, 2004, 11:39:40 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by hitech
The only time an aircraft has too much fuel on board is when it is on fire.
Erm, no...

The other time is in a 4-seater with the seats filled with fat bastages like me, and/or you're about to take off (or at least you're going to try) from a short runway with no headwind on a very hot day. Even Britain gets a few of those...