Talking about yellow crud makes me wonder:
I have been suffering from severe abdominal cramps and pain and sometimes have bloody diarrhea. Every once in a while I have a severe urgency to have a bowel movement. I have had a persistent fever, and have lost my appetite, so I have lost a lot of weight. I feel worn out; tired all the time, and my wife thinks I look anemic.
Aah, prob’ly nothin’.