Author Topic: Adventures in retail...  (Read 1234 times)

Offline DiabloTX

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Adventures in retail...
« on: June 03, 2005, 11:51:25 PM »
As I do this for a living, I'd like to share some wonderful stories with you guys about that amazingly smart general public monster that never ceases to amaze me.

I get called to the phone, a tech question on line 1.

"Technology, how may I help you?"

"I was in there earlier today and bought a coupla ink cartridges, HP 56 and 57.  I had no idea what printer I had so I thought those looked the closest to what I think I had.  Well I get home and I found that my printer uses the 15 and the 78 cartridges.  Do you think that the 56 and 57 cartridges will fit in place of the 15 and 78?"

"No ma'am, they won't.  Although some HP cartridges are interchangable, such as the 27 and 28 with the 56 and 57 on some printers, those that you have are not."

"Are you sure?"

"Yes ma'am."

"Guess I should have talked to an employee then.  Could they have told me what cartridges I needed?"

"Only if you know the make and model printer that you have we could."

"You mean you can't tell me that?"

:rolleyes:


Another good one:

"Do you guys match prices with ultrasuperlowabsolutebottompr ices.com?"

:rolleyes: :rolleyes:
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline JB88

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« Reply #1 on: June 04, 2005, 12:01:29 AM »
saw my first thrift store laptop the other day.

sigh.

(i did find a spanking shiny slide projector though...joy...)
this thread is doomed.
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To strive, to seek, to find, and not to yield. -Ulysses.

word.

Offline Hangtime

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« Reply #2 on: June 04, 2005, 12:03:51 AM »
I have a battery busniess.

I get this one at least once a week:

"ummm... is the red wire important??"

Number two...

"I hooked it up, and it started to smoke... after awile it stopped working. Whats wrong??"

I can never resist the answer...

"Oh, damn. The smoke leaked out??"

"yes!"

"All of it??"

"i think so"

"you'll have to send it back to the manufacturer I'm afraid.. "

"why??"

"because ALL electronics run on smoke. once the smoke leaks out.. well; that's it. You'll need to get the smoke replaced"

'can it be fixed locally?"

"Only if you can find the right kind of smoke...."

"do you have smoke?"

-----

I can go on; I'll spare yah. ;)
The price of Freedom is the willingness to do sudden battle, anywhere, any time and with utter recklessness...

...at home, or abroad.

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #3 on: June 04, 2005, 12:05:46 AM »
LMFAO Hang, good stuff.

I am actually gonna do this on a daily/weekly basis.  Some of this **** is so funny it has to be shared.  Like a customer "gem" of the day in retail post.
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline rpm

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« Reply #4 on: June 04, 2005, 01:32:45 AM »
The average consumer constantly amazes me. They constantly try to pass off the wrong item for a sale item and then get offended when you won't give it to them.

"THE SIGN SAID!" is their warcry, but when you go retrive the sign and show it to them at the register, point out that the product they have is in no way, shape or form the product the sign is for they immediately become insulted.

What do they expect me to do? "I'm so sorry that you have the reading comprehension of a 3 toed sloth. Here, let me lose my job by allowing you to steal from me with my knowledge."
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Stay thirsty my friends.

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #5 on: June 04, 2005, 01:36:35 AM »
Yep RPM, same here.  It is especially contagious to those that try to hide behind a language barrier.  They know no english but say "free" or "discount" and thier faces light up everytime.
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline Hangtime

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« Reply #6 on: June 04, 2005, 01:43:59 AM »
Beg pardon, but this parrot is DEAD.....

:D
The price of Freedom is the willingness to do sudden battle, anywhere, any time and with utter recklessness...

...at home, or abroad.

Offline Chairboy

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« Reply #7 on: June 04, 2005, 01:45:57 AM »
It's not always just the customer.

Yesterday, I needed to get some motherboard screws.  The only half electronics place nearby was Best Buy.  I've gotten stuff like this from Best Buy in LA (where I learned a lot about what Best Buy sometimes does and doesn't have), but this was my first time at the new Springfield, OR store.

I walk in, and find a rep.

"Pardon me, do you have motherboard screws?"

Person doesn't know answer, so goes and gets the senior sales guy, the "tech".  When asked, he answers "Well, this is a new location, so we don't have any specialty items like that yet" (so far, I'm fine with this.  They really do sell larger scale components, I was just sorta hoping they might have 'em, but it's no big deal.  But then he continues with "but if you go to http://www.bestbuy.com, you can probably order them there."

As soon as he rattled off the website, I turned and began my departure.  I laughed at the idea of ordering some motherboard screws from freakin http://www.bestbuy.com.  $1.99 + $8 shipping, 6-8 weeks probably.

There's another thing I learned in LA: "Gracias, para no gracias."
"When fascism comes to America it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying a cross." - Sinclair Lewis

Offline majic

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« Reply #8 on: June 04, 2005, 01:46:36 AM »
Certain sections of my store have deals like 2 for $20 or 2 for $30.  I never ceases to amaze me when someone then asks "is everything in the store 2 for $20?"

Or picks out something from the 2 for $20 area, and another item that is $30 from the other side of the store, and wants the 2 for $20 price.

Or back when I worked in a liquor store, and the guy walks in and asks, and I quote:

"Where you all liquor at?"

Another, whilst standing next to the huge beer cooler, "Where do yo guys keep the cold beer?"

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #9 on: June 04, 2005, 01:56:30 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by Chairboy
It's not always just the customer.


Yes it is.  Always.  

:aok
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline GREENTENERAL

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« Reply #10 on: June 04, 2005, 01:58:37 AM »
Worked a stint at a hardware store

old guy walks in and asks for lightbulb replacement for his reading lamp

I show him the bulbs, he picks up a 100 watt

I suggest a 60 watt

he points at the price and says, "I'm no fool, the price is the same for both, I think I'll take the 100 and get more watts for my money"

Offline DiabloTX

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« Reply #11 on: June 04, 2005, 01:58:48 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by majic
Certain sections of my store have deals like 2 for $20 or 2 for $30.  I never ceases to amaze me when someone then asks "is everything in the store 2 for $20?"

Or picks out something from the 2 for $20 area, and another item that is $30 from the other side of the store, and wants the 2 for $20 price.


Buy 3 get 1 free means to them buy 2 get 1 free.
"There ain't no revolution, only evolution, but every time I'm in Denmark I eat a danish for peace." - Diablo

Offline rpm

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« Reply #12 on: June 04, 2005, 02:03:09 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by DiabloTX
Buy 3 get 1 free means to them buy 2 get 1 free.
Limit 2 with $10 purchase means you can buy as many as you want at the sale price without purchasing anything else.
My mind is a raging torrent, flooded with rivulets of thought cascading into a waterfall of creative alternatives.
Stay thirsty my friends.

storch

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« Reply #13 on: June 04, 2005, 08:00:26 AM »
having dealt with the public since 1980 and the greatest portion of those years as an entrepenuer I would like to remind you that those very same people you belittle and treat condescendingly pay your salaries and keep your place of business/employment open.  be thankful for every customer irrespective of their attitudes.  in my shop the customer is always right.  that policy has paid of in spades even when on occasion I have lost in order to maintain goodwill.

Offline SunTracker

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« Reply #14 on: June 04, 2005, 08:07:04 AM »
LOL STORCH you crack me up