Seagoon,
All my sympathies go out to you and your family in your present situation. I may get in a lot of trouble for what i'm about to say but I mean you no disrespect. my father was a minister for several years I never did understand organized religion, nor do I think I ever will. I have lived in several manses I will say this they are very nice, large an opulent. It was always very confusing to me here we were trying to help the poor and disenfranchised having taken some kind of pledge of poverty, yet we were living on a large estate, I have never quite been able to understand this. Without getting into it too deeply I just don't believe in organized religion, however I will say this I have seen my father preside over baptisms, marriages, funerals and comfort people on there deathbed all services that were appreciated beyond words. I don't know how to explain it but somehow the system gets all distorted and twisted it never seems to work as people think it does. When I was still very young my father gave up the ministry, although we lived in a large beautiful home, I don't believe that he thought he was being paid enough to put his children through college so he joined the real world. Like I was saying "twisted" lots of money and assets but they don't seem to spend it on the people.
Well after that little prelude i'll try to be as gentle as possible. I don't understand why you left a good job to go into the seminary. I certainly applaud your efforts to help other people if that's the reason why you join the seminary. I don't believe that you needed to spend 30 K or join the seminary to help other people. I believe organized religion to be as inept and corrupt as government. As we've seen recently sometimes organized religion can be downright evil. I guess I'll just come right out and say it you should have taken care of your family first and saved the religious nonsense for your free time, then you would not have found yourself in the spot you are now. Well I'm kind of sorry for saying that but I just dont understand why people feel the need to sacrifice themselves and the ones around them for some kind of religious baloney. Where is your God? Why hasn't he come to help you? You have devoted yourself to him and what have you gotten in return? If there is a God, then explain this, why is it young innocent children suffer and die? Every time i ask that question I always get some kind of answer that makes no sense or seems like some kind of lame excuse. By the way am i going to hell? Well I guess I've gone too far really I wish you no disrespect it just seems that you've gotten yourself into a bad spot for what seems to me to be just silly. To tell the truth you really shouldn't be in this spot it's more the fault of government than anything else.
OK so I've been ranting stuff like this really winds my clock. Here's some of my suggestions to try and help you out of your current situation. Have you tried the resources of your seminary school? I don't know what religious organizations you are affiliated with but I do know that even Christians hire good Jewish lawyers now that's funny. What I mean is the regional, National and international religious organizations keep on retainer or in their employ some very good accountants and lawyers. For instance I know my father's organization the Protestants offer several services to their pastors everything from counseling to low-interest loans. For many years my father had a Sears credit-card that said Reverend on it and he always got a standard 20% discount on anything he bought, I always thought that was kind of funny. Sears has since discontinued that practice many years ago. It seems to me that somebody such as yourself should be able to find some kind of helps somewhere without the personal expense of hiring your own lawyer. Perhaps there is someone in your own congregation who can help you.
Well I hope you won't hold my words against me it just happens to be that I personally believe organized religion is just, well silly. I'm sure you and your family will find some kind of solution. If I were you I would use the resources and power of my religious affiliation.
Good luck to you.
