Author Topic: Seal Joke (Read 1190 times)

BBQ_Bob · « **on:** February 06, 2006, 10:56:26 AM »

A baby seal walks into a bar and sits down. "What can I get you?" asked the bartender.

"Anything but a Canadian Club" replied the seal.

ghi · « **Reply #1 on:** February 06, 2006, 11:15:38 AM »

Big competition for best macho man: a rook, a knight and a bish, everyone gets a monkey to have fun, and after 9 months the results:

1st Place the winner is -- the Rook macho man, his monkey gave birth to 4 baby (alt)monkeys.WTFG

2nd place-- the knight macho man, his monkey gave birth to 3 baby monkeys,wtg

3rd place-- the bish macho man-- his monkey gave birth to 2 baby monkeys,

The audience asked: --- Mr. bish macho, you were the favoritte for this competition, you won always last years, why are you the last now??

Bish macho replys: --cheaters, this year gave me a male monkey

Max · « **Reply #2 on:** February 06, 2006, 11:29:48 AM »

BBQ_Bob · « **Reply #3 on:** February 06, 2006, 11:50:02 AM »

Hold on I can still save this thread.

A rabbi, a priest, and a bishop walk into a bar.

The bartender says, "What is this, some kind of joke?"

StarOfAfrica2 · « **Reply #4 on:** February 06, 2006, 12:11:14 PM »

No no no, thats not how it goes.

Here's how it should go.

Two men walk into a bar.

The third one ducks.

Bada-boom.

Max · « **Reply #5 on:** February 06, 2006, 12:13:06 PM »

Errrr fellers....don't quit yer days jobs

Meatwad · « **Reply #6 on:** February 06, 2006, 12:30:57 PM »

I was watching the Boondocks last night , and it said the top killer of blacks in the USA is....

FEMA

Meatwad · « **Reply #7 on:** February 06, 2006, 12:35:35 PM »

A guy goes to the Post Office to interview for a job.
The interviewer asks him, "Are you a veteran?"

The guy says, "Why yes, in fact, I served two tours in Vietnam."

"Good," says the interviewer, "That counts in your favor. Do you have any service-related disabilities?"

The guy says, "In fact I am 100% disabled. During a battle, an explosion removed my private parts so they declared me disabled, it doesn't affect my ability to work, though."

"Sorry to hear about the damage, but I have some good news for you, I can hire you right now! Our working hours are 8 to 4. Come on in about 10, and we'll get you started."

The guy says, "If working hours are from 8 to 4, why do you want me to come at 10?"

"Well, here at the post office, we don't do anything but sit around and scratch our balls for the first two hours. Don't need you here for that!"

wetrat · « **Reply #8 on:** February 06, 2006, 12:52:28 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Meatwad
A guy goes to the Post Office to interview for a job.
The interviewer asks him, "Are you a veteran?"

The guy says, "Why yes, in fact, I served two tours in Vietnam."

"Good," says the interviewer, "That counts in your favor. Do you have any service-related disabilities?"

The guy says, "In fact I am 100% disabled. During a battle, an explosion removed my private parts so they declared me disabled, it doesn't affect my ability to work, though."

"Sorry to hear about the damage, but I have some good news for you, I can hire you right now! Our working hours are 8 to 4. Come on in about 10, and we'll get you started."

The guy says, "If working hours are from 8 to 4, why do you want me to come at 10?"

"Well, here at the post office, we don't do anything but sit around and scratch our balls for the first two hours. Don't need you here for that!"

indy007 · « **Reply #9 on:** February 06, 2006, 01:05:11 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Meatwad
I was watching the Boondocks last night , and it said the top killer of blacks in the USA is....

FEMA

Grandpa's Fight! A favorite around my house. Got the avi sitting on my desktop lol.

ghi · « **Reply #10 on:** February 06, 2006, 01:31:47 PM »

Don't mess with grandma

BBQ_Bob · « **Reply #11 on:** February 06, 2006, 02:26:40 PM »

A dog with his leg wrapped in bandages hobbles into a saloon. He slides up to the bar and announces: "I'm lookin' fer the man that shot my paw."

Mister Fork · « **Reply #12 on:** February 06, 2006, 02:30:01 PM »

Personally, this thread should be

The comment about Canadian's and seals, that is an insult to me as a Canuck. I'd

but I don't have the priviliage.

Lock it HT.

ridley1 · « **Reply #13 on:** February 06, 2006, 02:46:47 PM »

A trapper is on his snowmobile going into town when it dies......

He decides to go into a diner for a sandwich after he makes the call to a mechanic to come out and look at the machine.

Once he's finished eating...he walks back out to the snowmobile and the mechanic is already there looking at it...

The mechanic says."looks like you blew a seal"

The trapper wipes his mouth and says" Nah...it's only Mayo"

BBQ_Bob · « **Reply #14 on:** February 06, 2006, 03:01:38 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Mister Fork
Personally, this thread should be

The comment about Canadian's and seals, that is an insult to me as a Canuck. I'd but I don't have the priviliage.

Lock it HT.

Sorry Mr. Fork

I KEED