Parents charge son for borrowing car, killed in jail

[Elfie]

Every kid is an individual Chairboy and not one of them responds exactly like another one.

BTW, I went through a rebellious phase when I was a teen. And I borrowed the car w/o permission. Oh, and my parents didn't send me to jail, they grounded my bellybutton and talked to me about acceptable behavior, consequences, and what would happen if I pulled a stunt like that when i was an adult. I haven't stolen a car since, believe it or not.

Tryed that with my son and guess what? In one ear and right back out the other one.

I was divorced from my son's mother, she remarried and I didnt get to have a whole lot of input (her choice, not mine) in my sons life when he was younger.

You see "last resort" and assume that this is the final straw in a litany of terrible offenses.

I see "last resort", and based on what the arrest was for and the fact that he didn't have any criminal record, and I see a last resort that was a lot closer to the 'first resort' of most parents.

No, I dont see a final straw in a litany of terrible offenses.....you are assuming. What I do see is parents that are at their wits end on how to *get through* to this young man. I've been in their shoes. They were not the first parents to decide to let their children go to jail and I doubt they will be the last. Sometimes it works, sometimes it doesnt, but you wont know if it will help your child unless you try.

We also dont know what other measures these parents tryed or what other *stunts* this young man pulled.

[Brenjen]

No one here was there & knows the situation with the kid, maybe he needed more than conventional punishment but I think we all can agree taking the family sedan w/o permission is not a death sentence crime. But anytime you are confronted with arrest, you could be killed.

 I knew a kid who lived down the street from me when I was a teen who was a little rough around the edges, he was throwing a fit & his parents, who were fairly old to have a teenage son, called the police & told them he was tearing the place up & they couldn't control him. Well, when the cops got there they ordered him to come outside over a loudspeaker & he did. When he came out, he was holding a piece of water pipe he was wrecking the place with & a local detective named Pokey Gibson mistook the water pipe (he claims) for a gun & gutted the boy with a 12 gauge shotgun. He died right there on the porch.

 I don't have the answers, but I would never call the police on my kids. If I couldn't handle them i suppose I would get help from some friends & evict them from the house. I just don't know; I am thankful I am not faced with such dilemmas.

[Chairboy]

Originally posted by Elfie
What I do see is parents that are at their wits end on how to *get through* to this young man.

I understand, and perhaps it was even the right decision.  

My assertion has been that it's very possible that their "last straw" was closer to my "first straw".  

In a vacuum of information, it's easy to churn around and speculate, and I don't mean to suggest that you're wrong and that I'm sure the parents are at fault.  I'm just saying that, based on the info available, I think it's very possible that they involved the police too soon.

Personally, I can't imagine giving up that type of control to the government willingly.  I think they stick their nose in personal business too much already, the idea of calling them over to 'help' me raise my kids...  no thanks.

[Elfie]

Well Chairboy, I hope your kids dont give you the kind of grief my son (and apparently this young man) gave us. I sincerely hope you never have to make this kind of descion.

I actually had custody of my son for awhile. I sent him back to his mother when my wife and I decided that we didnt want his influence on our daughter (only had one daughter at the time.) His mother signed papers giving custody to the state when I sent him back. She was sick and tired of his stealing, lying and running away. (Among other things) His stealing was so bad we had to put a dead bolt lock on our bedroom door, anything of value went behind the locked door.

Dont judge this young mans parents to harshly. We just dont know what else had been going on.

My son has finally pulled his head from his anal orifice, but it took getting into trouble over an ATM card that wasnt his, having to pay back several thousand dollars and spending some time in a juvenile facility. Now he is developing into a fine young man who is also becoming a fine husband and father.

[AquaShrimp]

Kids can turn rotten if they associate with scumbags at school.  Soon enough, they become scumbags themselves.

[Excel1]

http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/story.cfm?c_id=1&objectid=10398589

Liam's parents decided to press criminal charges against their son after he took their vehicle without permission in a bid to stop him getting into more serious trouble after a series of "minor misdemeanours".

He was appearing before the North Shore Court on a number of charges including breach of bail, burglary and driving while forbidden

 

He was on a final warning from the court after breaching bail -- including a curfew -- a number of times.

The kid was on a rocky path and his parents must have been desperate and out of options. It's not their fault. The inadequacies of the corrections department in Auckland were exposed, and not for the first time.



http://www.nzherald.co.nz/section/story.cfm?c_id=1&ObjectID=10398970

The man accused of killing Liam Ashley allegedly yelled to guards rushing to help the teen: "I've done enough damage. You can't save him. I've broken his neck."

The death penalty needs to be reinstated in NZ, we have too many vicious killers like this scumbag for the comparative size of the country and population.

[Brenjen]

The scumbag p.o.s. should have his hands cut off & forced down his throat.