Author Topic: should I? (Read 1314 times)

Yeager · « **Reply #45 on:** September 26, 2006, 01:43:37 PM »

Sounds like you are not ready. Make sure you arent just putting a downpayment on what you hope is a piece of tail nightly for life instead of entering into a lawful contract to love and cherrish in sickness and in health until one of you dies....its very heavy stuff and must not be taken lightly. A mistake of this magnitute can ruin the entirety of your life, or at least put one hell of a dampner on it....

Make damned sure the woman is your soul mate.

Furious · « **Reply #46 on:** September 26, 2006, 02:06:37 PM »

...date women on T.V. with the help of Chuck Woolery.

Airscrew · « **Reply #47 on:** September 26, 2006, 02:26:06 PM »

North, my opinion

Nothing wrong with having the question, "Am I ready for this?" because you aint buying car or a house. This is a huge investment with your life

but is it safe to assume that it will be harder for her to leave after she signs the paperwork. will she trust me more? will she still be honest and reasonable?
Trust begins before marriage, Marriage does not lead to trust. If you have any doubts or trust issues now they will only get worse.

We've been through alot, but every time I'm about to loose her I realize that I'm nothing without her, that she is my future and my past and my everything.
do you really believe that? "that I'm nothing without her"? Because if you are nothing without her then you'll still be nothing with her.

Best advice I can give you is communication and empathy. Put yourself in her shoes, look at yourself through her eyes, see what she sees, hear what she hears, feel what she feels. The only way you can do that is talk

Westy · « **Reply #48 on:** September 26, 2006, 03:14:52 PM »

"Would you suggest for me to go to some crappy "yahoo romance" chat?
What kind of advice do you think I might get there..."

No suggestions and no idea. It's just I certainly wouldn't ask for advice on such a serious life-decision (if that is what you're doing and not merely trolling) on an online game webboard. The same way I wouldn't head to an Aubuchon Hardware forum and ask for advice about heart stints or whether or not I should get a pacemaker merely because the others and myself have a fondness for Makita power tools.

north · « **Reply #49 on:** September 26, 2006, 03:57:08 PM »

Quote

I certainly wouldn't ask for advice on such a serious life-decision

Westy, I wasn't asking for advice. I just passed the thoughts I had.

by the way, the feedback helped alot. Thank you, guys:aok

x0847Marine · « **Reply #50 on:** September 26, 2006, 04:03:53 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Meatwad
I thought the same thing when I first got married, and 3 years later I realised I done the wrong thing and shouldnt of never got married. I really screwed up my life on that one

Took me less than a year, a younger very hot young actress / singer / waitress from up state NY I met who decided I was a big brother she'd like to sex up.. that got me thinking, "why am I passing this up again?... oh yea, married"

A good woman is hard to find though, it's always a tough call.

I'm thinking that even at 38, I'm way too immature for married life... I love to party like a 20 something, go on adventures to seedy dive bars, drink, smoke, hang out till 5am... and talking the chicks is my thing, my buddy calls it the 'gift of gab', but its not.. chicks are just as horny, dirty and want the exact same things we guys do, besides there are a few signs to look for if a girl has noticed you, if I see 1 or 2.. I'll go say hello... still lol, I toss any numbers before getting home and it literally hurts to think I'm throwing away an opportunity for some strange.

Anyway man, take a long look at yourself, are you ready to give up ALL your current AND future chick options.. until you die of old age? Ask your future wife the same thing too.

I'm not built for married life, yet, maybe you are..if so best of luck, if you're not.. run, now, very fast.

x0847Marine · « **Reply #51 on:** September 26, 2006, 04:21:26 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by north
thanks Neubob. but I don't care about formal part...
I enjoy being with her... but is it safe to assume that it will be harder for her to leave after she signs the paperwork. will she trust me more? will she still be honest and reasonable?

Nope. Look like shes just testing you with marriage.

Chicks with trust issues will test, and test and test... if this "marry me" is a test, DON'T DO IT UNTIL SHE TRUSTS YOU FOR REAL.

You can pass every test with rose smelling sunshine squirting from your anus, she'll still expect you to leave her.. and in extreme cases, like with my X-GF, she'll create a situation that is engineered to drive you away so she can say "I knew it!!!, I knew all along he'd leave"

I cant believe I'm suggesting this, but last nights episode of Showtimes "Sexual healing" addressed this exact thing.. you should watch it, watch how this ugly fat guy treats his skinny, horny, cute GF like crap.

If you don't have showtime, I think you can buy single shows on itunes. The show really is cheesy, but last nights show, I found fascinating given my past relationship... maybe you will too. Just don't admit watching it to your guys friends.

Edit: I wanted to add.. I spent so much time trying to make my X trust me, doing little things where ever.. she called that "obsession" exactly like the Showtime peeps did. So I ignored her for a year straight, validating her belief I'd leave, as if she had trusted me and I betrayed her. That flushed all chances of hooking up again... I could not have won, she saw to it. Just because you get married doesn't mean she'll give up her life long daily behavior of not trusting you.

DREDIOCK · « **Reply #52 on:** September 26, 2006, 05:34:20 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Saintaw
You need more advice from flight sim nerds...

Actually not too long ago some of the best advise I've ever received.
I received from a couple of flight sim nerds that frequent this BBS.

Way I see it. Their opinion isnt any more or less valid then anyone elses.

Thrawn · « **Reply #53 on:** September 26, 2006, 06:45:09 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by Hap
Marriage is a vocation.

No it's not. It takes alot of hard work.

Thrawn · « **Reply #54 on:** September 26, 2006, 06:46:28 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by x0847Marine
Took me less than a year, a younger very hot young actress / singer / waitress from up state NY I met who decided I was a big brother she'd like to sex up.. that got me thinking, "why am I passing this up again?... oh yea, married"

I'm glad that the fact that it would be incest didn't put you off.

DREDIOCK · « **Reply #55 on:** September 26, 2006, 08:07:03 PM »

Quote

Originally posted by north
appreciate it fellas. I know what its like to be in relationship ( we've been together for almost 4 years). What I was asking is "will anything change after marriage? and if yes should I be doing that "

will anything change?

Aside fro the tongue in cheek stuff (but still all true) I alrady mentioned.

Contemplate this.

If there is a problem with anything before the marriage. it only tends to worsen once your married.
Do NOT get married with the false notion that whatever problem you may have..such as trust. before. Will suddenly be cured by a wedding ring.

This does not happen.

If anything it gets worse.

Westy · « **Reply #56 on:** September 26, 2006, 08:44:23 PM »

My bad I guess. I thought your post began with "should I?"

AWMac · « **Reply #57 on:** September 26, 2006, 09:24:02 PM »

If you have to ask yourself and others "Should I?" then you don't have the selfesteem nor the morale fortitude to become a Husband let alone drag a Woman into something you yourself are not sure of.

Drop it, take some time to grow up then reask yourself. Otherwise you are wasting her time and yours ..... and by the time you understand that, there may be children involved. Then they lose also because you were to young to make the right descision.

BTW I've been married now 26 Years, 3 Children. 2 Daughters 24 and 18 and a Son 7. Love it!

If you had to ask you already knew the answer... you don't need us to make up your mind.

Mac

x0847Marine · « **Reply #58 on:** September 27, 2006, 12:23:25 AM »

Quote

Originally posted by Thrawn
I'm glad that the fact that it would be incest didn't put you off.

Incest is best kept in the family, son.

Thrawn · « **Reply #59 on:** September 27, 2006, 12:30:22 AM »

You bet, skippy.