A Welsh farmer, walking through his field, notices a man drinking out of a pond, using one hand. 
The Welsh farmer shouted: 'Paid a yfed a dwr, maer gwerthin wedi Cachu un a for.' Which means: 'Don't drink the water - the cows have s**t in it.' 
The man shouts back: 'I'm a Muslim, I don't understand.  Please speak English.' 
The Welsh farmer says: 'Use two hands, they hold more'!!!