Yeesh - I had promised myself I was done with this topic, but I guess not. There are those of you who are (legitimately, I might add) asking why people (me among others) felt a need to say anything if they didn't think they could just accept what's been said at face value on this subject.
You are asking "Why not just skip over it, just ignore it, and move on?"
Earlier, I said that I felt that I was representing others when I posted - this time, I am only just representing me. And the reason for me is that I simply couldn't. When some kid claims he's psy ops and it seems utterly unlikely, you just grin and skip to the next thread. This (for me) is different.
I and my wife never thought we'd have kids. I had surgery to fix a problem that didn't seem to take, and after a few years we resigned ourselves to what was the expected outcome and focused on other aspects to life. After all, there are far worse tragedies in life, although I understand the pain, helplessness (and at times anger) of anyone who desperately want kids and can't. Anyway, an unexpected miracle occurred, and we had a son born to us - prematurely. A premature birth is terrifying enough, but then he fell ill, and we were told it could go either way, the only thing to do was wait. I can't describe the terror that accompanied the thought that after waiting so long that we could lose him - humble alluded to it and some of you will understand and some of you won't. For two days I moved beyond the terror, into a calm acceptance of the certainty that he was gone. Anyway, he rallied, and after 12 days in the ICU, we took him home - a second miracle. And then a few month's later we found that he had a congenital heart defect, and were told again that it could go either way - the only fix is an operation for a replacement heart valve, which they can't do until adulthood. His heart condition would either stabilize and he'd be OK, or it would continue to worsen and we'd eventually lose him, and either way, other than a few precautions such as avoiding chest impacts and being extremely careful about infections, there was not much anyone could do. So every few months for years we took him in to hear the new verdict, and while after a few years of good prognosis the terror kind of dulls a bit, having the sword of Damacles always hanging over your head changes you. I don't need or want your sympathy, because the truth is we've been as lucky as you can be - every time that something bad has seemed likely, the very best possible outcome has been what's happened. He's now 15, and the worst is over. Yes, he'll probably need an operation - someday. But by then who knows what the current technology will be.
But like I said - the point is that the sword hanging over your head changes you. I don't read the stories in the paper that tell of tragedies happening to children - they strike a little too close to home. I don't read books or watch movies if I know they include tragedies happening to children either, for the same reason. And when I am taken by surprise by a book or a movie like Pay it Forward or more recently The Road to Tarabithia, I feel angry and betrayed by the movie writers for subjecting me to the death of a child - even make believe - unawares.
So when I read that someone in a community I feel to be a part of has lost what to them is the only child they will ever have, my heart simply wrenches. Here is someone who is living out my very worst nightmare.
But... at the same time, whatever his reasons may be, someone in the community that neither I nor anyone I know personally knows firsthand has told a story that (to be as kind as possible) seems increasingly unlikely, about somone else in the community that I never knew. And given past scams, it's not outside the realm of possibilities that this might be one too.
And so I've agonized over it. I badly want to believe him, because I have a sense for the pain he and his wife must be going through - and although I know better about human beings, I don't really want to actually have to believe again that someone is capable of making a sick joke of something like that. At the same time, I badly want to not believe him, because I'd really rather believe that it didn't happen anyway - except that if it didn't happen, then I want someone's privates roasted on a stick for subjecting me (and the rest of us too, but mostly me) to a sick joke if that's what it was.
FWIW, after several PM conversations I'm more inclined than ever to believe that the story is probably unlikely, but that the loss is very real. So I'm very very very sorry for Hawkeye and his family for the loss of Tailspin, and if the story is not entirely true, just as sorry for whatever in this sometimes sh***y world made whatever the truth is so unbearable that what he told us was preferable.
