Has anyones wife ever cheated on them

[infowars]

Okay so check this out.  I have realized what has happened and I do not want it to happen to anyone else.

I have one single friend who I hung out with and partied on Friday.  I we got home from drinking and dancing and me of course pouting we talked.  For a long time we talked.

My friend has been sleeping with a married woman for about 6 months.  She told him every reason why she is doing this to her husband.  Now her husband  is similar to me, had a good job,  was great with kids, stayed home,  never strayed didn't even really drink...  So what was the problem?  He was ignoring her.  Just going to work is not enough.  He asked me how many times I've taken my wife out in the last year.  My answer was zero.  He pointed out the fact that my hair looks like crap,  he pointed out that I've gained weight.  He asked if I make her feel like a girl.  And of course I said no.  I have totally ignored her emotional necessities.

That hit me like a ton of bricks.  He was right.  My wife is very attractive,  smart and has a great personality.  She is a catch.  I ignored her needs for too long,  I sat and played video games while she was upstairs generating more and more animosity.

I've realized my contribution to this and accept responsibility.  I only hope she can see how I feel for real and give me another chance.

Wish me luck.

[fauxace]

Are u Kiddin lol.Ill Tell ya what,,I have a wonderful wife that eccepts me playin the game,Im outta her hair ,shes outta ine ,,so ta speak..its Our time time to be what we wanna be as woman have theres,,But people are different,,,good luck man,,Thats is really stupid,,,to go that far in to a split up ,,Like going to chat...I think she needs to re think man,,Good luck...or u explain the game,,there are a few girls here,but there all married..Good luck.It our way of of getting away from the work thing,,Sorry she feels the way she does..GL man <S>

[fauxace]

Ok ,miss read,,If it was because Of AH,That would be different,,Why post stuff about personell stuff unless otherwise,,, 2 sides to every story,,And I dont wanna know,,Talk to your local Paper in Ms Abby

[Baitman]

I have totally ignored her emotional necessities.

That hit me like a ton of bricks.  He was right.  My wife is very attractive,  smart and has a great personality.  She is a catch.  I ignored her needs for too long,  I sat and played video games while she was upstairs generating more and more animosity.

I've realized my contribution to this and accept responsibility.  I only hope she can see how I feel for real and give me another chance.

Wish me luck.

you ask for peoples opinions on the forum like you wanted some advice. 

I think you wanted people to feel sorry for you

 Most everyone has commented to move on live your life with your kid, (real good stuff) and now a buddy and you go out drinking and he convinces you that you are a pile of manure.

Grow a set, move on and don't look back...

Once a cheater always a cheater.... Why mess up the rest of your life when you are given a chance to break free now.

[infowars]

I feel like there are some things I could've done differently.  There are kids involved too.

I appreciate everyones advice.  It has really helped me over the past few days.

With this new insight my friend gave me I am going to give it another shot.

I don't live by cliches.  We've been married 10 years,  I owe it to my kids to give it a whirl.

Thanks.... again.  everyone here,  even the rude ones.

[mechanic]

right now it is hard to even believe you are telling the truth here infowars... sorry, that just how it seems.

meh

[infowars]

Lying hardly.  Emotionally confused very.  My parents are also irritated,  they want to nail her to the wall.  I guess I am going through cycles and really don't know what to do or how to feel.

That's what sucks about only getting one side of a story.  You guys haven't got a history of our relationship nor anything I've done wrong.  As with all my friends they support me and hate her.  Just as all her friends support her and hate me.

I posted here because I wanted was kinda looking for examples of similar situations and how they ended up.  I've got many replies and a lot of help. 

You guys have no idea how this board has helped me.  Even if I do not choose what everyone else thinks is sound advice I still have been comforted by the responses I have received.

[mechanic]

well if this is all true i do feel for you, i know what love or even desire can do to a person and lies, cheating etc can brew a deadly cocktail....just hope you can find a better place for your head. Mine is pretty screwed up too, and very secure at the same time. One thing i have worked out is the more you actualy understand a woman the more they try and hide. They might want to share themself and  you should listen when they do, but god help the man who questions his woman one too many times about something she doesnt want to talk about.

[Dadsguns]

I feel like there are some things I could've done differently.  There are kids involved too.

I appreciate everyones advice.  It has really helped me over the past few days.

With this new insight my friend gave me I am going to give it another shot.

I don't live by cliches.  We've been married 10 years,  I owe it to my kids to give it a whirl.

Thanks.... again.  everyone here,  even the rude ones.

Two of the most important things you said.  Good Luck.

[mechanic]

 If you had no kids my advice would be still no. You might think you are strong enough to put the past behind you, but that is rejection and love/desire clouding your mind. Even if you got back together right now, you wouldnt be able to get the image of her and another guy out of your head. Your love life would suffer, you will be in constant arguments at the drop of a hat whenever you cannot block the past out of your head. The chances of totaly recovering from this situation and truly loving each other are next to impossible and could take years to be smoothed out. Speaking from experience and i dont even have a child to think about. It is possible but not without going through hell first..
 
You owe it to your son to provide a stress free enviroment to grow up in. You do not owe it to your son to salvage a failing marriage that can only be a living hell to reconstruct.

[ink]

If you had no kids my advice would be still no. You might think you are strong enough to put the past behind you, but that is rejection and love/desire clouding your mind. Even if you got back together right now, you wouldnt be able to get the image of her and another guy out of your head. Your love life would suffer, you will be in constant arguments at the drop of a hat whenever you cannot block the past out of your head. The chances of totaly recovering from this situation and truly loving each other are next to impossible and could take years to be smoothed out. Speaking from experience and i dont even have a child to think about. It is possible but not without going through hell first..
 
You owe it to your son to provide a stress free enviroment to grow up in. You do not owe it to your son to salvage a failing marriage that can only be a living hell to reconstruct.

you are right, but LOVE will overcome giving the opportunity, But love must be there, in the first place.

[RAM]

in my own experience, if she says "no", its "no". I've never been cheated by any GF I've ever had, but if what you say is true, if she's lost the feelings for you (and if she cheats on you repeatedly, that's a big hint she has) it's all over. For good.

Dunno about kids, I have none. But I know about how destructive can be the life of someone who tries to win a lost cause. Or someone who doesn't know when the only option is to let the other person go.

Went through it for two years and a half a (long) time ago, for a girl who left me and I couldn't accept the fact it was over. No cheating involved, she simply did not love me anymore.
I did my best to win her back for the next 30 months. I shed gallons of tears, forgot I had a life on my own, was distracted from my studies, got some 40lbs of extra fat on me, stopped playing sports, stopped going out, lost all my friends (They insisted on me forgetting her and I simply didn't want to hear that chore anymore...I told them to f... off and well, they did. Thankfully they were comprensive some time later ) and all the time I was not with her, I simply was closed in my own house, wondering what I was doing wrong and what could I do to make her return with me.

In my case there was no fault involved by any of the two sides. Sometimes it just happens that whatever feeling got you together is lost for either the guy or the girl. She didn't cheat on me, she did care for me a lot (we're great friends up to today) and she didn't want me to suffer. But she also didn't want to go on with a relationship that she simply felt would not work as she didn't love me anymore. Only when I realized that I could do nothing to win her back (when she started dating other guy) and accepted I had to let her go, I moved on. And it turned out it wasn't that hard to do. Took me months (honestly, years) to get completely over it, but I recovered my friends, lost my extra weight, finished my studies and dated new girls. Enjoyed all of it. A lot. And realized that no matter how good she was (And she is a great girl) all the time I spent giving my best to recover her was not worth it. Noone is worth the hell I lived in for that long.

So my advice: let her go. Probably that means a divorce (should mean it but it won't be the first time a married couple doesn't divorce because of kids, but reach a "friendly" agreement between them). Do your best to be with your kids and try to settle a "peaceful" agreement with her that gives you good access to them. Regarding kids I won't say anymore, I don't have any and no experience with them, but people here have given very good advice.

In the end...whatever anyone says, do what you find is best for you and your family. But if you want her back be ware that probably it's already a lost cause. And the fact that you still want to be with her plays against you, The fact that you are ready to forgive her cheating says a lot about you, really, but unfortunately she probably won't feel it that way. Women have some strange instinct that keeps them far away from men they perceive as weak, and forgiving her cheating may be perceived by her not as forgiveness, but as weakness, getting you even farther from her and finishing any (slim) chance you might still have.

But please, if you see it's not going to work, don't insist, don't wait and don't stay for months like I did. Don't lose your mind as I did. In the end you won't have her back anyway and you'll regret all the time you lost (I do)
best wishes, mate.

[Shamus]

Well loose weight and treat her better then, jeez your friend figured it out.

shamus

[Masherbrum]

I weighed 292 lbs in January 2007.   I was coming off of 4 months of unemployment and interviews.    On Oct 1st I weighed 275 lbs.   I'm now down to about 245 lbs with more weight loss to follow.   I'm doing it for myself and nothing else.   Is my wife happy?   Sure, but we just celebrated our 10th Wedding Anniversary.

My goal is to be around 200 lbs by March.   I watch what I eat and drink 1-2 gallons of water a day and severely limit the Carbs intake. 

[drdeathx]

^{I was coming off of 4 months of unemployment and interviews}



How would I figure this guy would be unemployed. And 4 months lol