Funny how many opinions and conditions people can build into an HO.
If both can shoot at each other at same time, it is an HO... and so what? They happen.
If one does not want to squeeze the trigger in that situation, it is his choice and liberty not to do so. However, he should not expect anything from the opponent. If you fly into an HO, live (or die) with your decision and forget about it. No further discussion needed. If you die in an HO, it is your own fault, nobody else is to blame.
I wish the "dead HO horse" could rest in peace already.