I agree, it's complicated and in shades of grey at best. People, their attitudes, and beliefs are forged and then constantly molded in reaction to their environment and experiences.
Best example I can find within myself is my nature towards women over the many years I've been interested, attracted and persued them. It's not a bitterness or resentment that I've developed towards them, just a lack of serious interest or as I put it "no desire to keep putting my hand into the meat grinder", or "tired of rushing through all the bad ones, plenty of time now to wait and go through looking for a good one". I'm not giving up on them or writing them all off, and I have more close female friends than male, but at first when I was younger and more naive I was definitely an openly nice guy that wouldn't give anyone (male or female) a doubt or my last dime... but being burned badly once and singed by nothing but a bunch of bad ones since has definitely changed my outlook on the whole lot of them; they're more trouble than good and a complete waste of my time and effort until they can minutely prove otherwise to me. This has been a most noticable change over time amongst my friends in my social group; from being on top of opening a door for a pretty lady halfway across the room to grabbing an armful of ladies I stumbled across to introduce to my buds... none of that anymore, it's just been flogged out of my nature.
