Are you saying everyone plays like you, and I'm just misinterpreting where they are in the cycle? I believe your play is courteous and fun for all. I do not, at all, believe it representative of how most are thinking or doing it. 
Not everyone plays like me, for sure. My point is, the only time you can really rely on people to stay out of your fight is when they can't get to you. As you get lower, more people are able to attack you. Spending all your time in a furball below 3k in a free for all arena is more or less begging to be attacked by all who see you.
With what I've described in the previous post, I am somewhat in control of who engages me, at least until I mess up. Being at 2-3k alt below 20 red planes, you have to expect every last one of them to take a poke at you. It's pure insanity to expect a different result.
If you are logged into the LWMA, you can expect if someone has an opportunity to kill you they're going to take it. That's what I like, and what I want from the other side is for both of us to throw everything but the kitchen sink at each other. If I dive into a crowd of 4 red planes, I assume I am now fighting 4 red planes. If I am engaged with 1 red plane and 3 more red icons appear, I begin tracking those other 3 icons as possible threats, as they likely are.
To me, anything less than full effort from the other side is artificial and doesn't belong in side vs side combat. I have my personal code of ethics, I ask if the friendly's got it under control when I happen on a 1v1 or a 2v2, I don't ho habitually, etc etc. I do however, expect the other side to do all those things, and plan my attack accordingly. I expect it, and plan for it, and if I'm unable to execute my plan (which sometimes involves tucking tail and running if there's more than 2 of them) I die. There are things I consider cheap, but it's part of the game and to be expected from the other side.
I just wish the guys that complain all the time about being killed in ways they dislike would realign their expectations with reality. I've been simming online for ~4 years, and it has always been this way from what I've seen. Individuals have (or lack) their own sense of right and wrong, and if you expect the worst out of them, any quarter they give you is a pleasant surprise. It makes for a much less stressful gaming experience, IMO.
icepac- Exactly. There is no limit to the amount of patience some online gamers have.
Wiley.