My favorite is the emails from 'FBI "Aegnt" John Currie', telling me how, while serving as official Diplomat to the Sudanese Monarchy, they discovered that said Prince (sometimes even the King himself

) is aware of my existance and has somehow stolen several million from me, despite the fact that I've only been old enough to be officially employed for a few years now.
I keep telling Mr. Currie I'm aware of the fact that Sudan doesn't have a monarchy, that FBI agents don't serve as "official diplomats", and that I really don't care about my lost millions, but he doesn't listen.
The FBI really needs to raise its standards

.