Ships work differently than planes and vehicles in AH. You know this, right?
Realistic wishes for a support staff of 3 programmers will go much further than jumping into other people's wish threads and adding a thousand variables that weren't part of the original wish. Even the realistic wishes have to take a number.
Dummy ships in the fleet work differently, sure.. But player spawned PT boats already exist in the game too, so the issue isn't it being a seagoing vessel.. The PT's have Helm Control, that allows you to change course and speed at will, Unified or individual fire control, ability to jump from position to position, and torpedoes to boot.. And the models of DD already exist in the game too..
I don't think it so unrealistic, to add the control system of a PT boat, to a Destroyer, both of which already exist in the game.. So you make a new Dazzle skin for the player spawned DDs, so players can tell them apart from the fleet dummy DDs on escort duty..
Some features would need to be added to the DD model, like the swing out trainable Torpedo launchers, But that was suggested in the OP's wish anyway.. Main Gun and AA gun directors also, (which would unify gun control).. Actually the Gun directors should apply to all naval vessels equipped with them..
Then we could put some of that Destroyer Doctrine into REAL action!