Author Topic: Ghetto humor  (Read 311 times)

Offline 1Cane

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Ghetto humor
« on: September 03, 2023, 04:15:39 PM »
My daughters husband was stationed  at NAS Lemore in Ca. They were living off post in a large apartment complex.  Big surprise there were some character's  who slept all day and partied loudly at night keeping my daughter's new born baby awake. They politely asked to please hold the noise  down and about eight of them explained  they would not do that! My daughter asked me what to do. I asked her where the circuit breakers for the complex was at and she found them. The next time the bad boys played their music loud at 2am my daughter flipped their circuit breaker and they quietly set in the dark. Waiting for maintenance  to fix the problem. She did this a couple of times until they moved on to  base housing.         :old:
AkCaine

Offline GasTeddy

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Re: Ghetto humor
« Reply #1 on: September 04, 2023, 04:59:19 AM »
An elderly man rear ends three rapper gangstas driving an expensive sports car. Enraged, they jump out of the car and confront the old man. “Look what you did to my car” boss of the gang yells. “you’re gonna give me $10,000 right now or I’m gonna beat you to a pulp!”

“Oh my” says the old man, I don't have that kind of money. Let me call my son, he trains dolphins and he’ll know what to do.

Dolphins, the gangsta huffs, while rolling his eyes. The old man pulls out his phone, dials his son and just as the son answers, gangsta snatches the phone away from the old man and bellows "so, YOU’RE a dolphin trainer, huh? Well, your old man here just rear ended my car and I need ten grand right now or I’m gonna beat you AND your old man to a pulp".

I’ll be there in 10 minutes, says the voice calmly on the other end.

Exactly ten minutes later a jeep pulls up and a guy hops out and proceeds to pulverize the bullies, leaving them in a heap on the side of the road. When he’s finished, he walks over to his father and says: “For the LAST TIME dad…. I train SEALS…. NAVY SEALS…. NOT dolphins.”

Offline Widewing

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Re: Ghetto humor
« Reply #2 on: September 04, 2023, 10:54:04 AM »
About 15 years ago, my next door neighbor had his sweet wife leave him. He would drink excessively and become physically abusive. After she left him, he drank even more. One Sunday evening, my daughter wakes me to complain about the neighbor's loud music blasting. He must have come home drunk and decided to blast music. He didn't answer his phone. So, I dressed and walked over to his house. I pounded on the door to no response. I looked in a window to find him passed out on his sofa, beer cans covered his coffee table. I checked and found his garage door unlocked. I opened the door, went to the circuit breaker panel and threw the main breaker. I waited about 10 seconds and flipped it back on. Lights on, stereo off. Good. Back home to bed. The following evening, I had a conversation with the numbskull. Told him next time, I'll call the police and they will break down the door to check on him and turn off music. He thinks he's a tough guy when drunk. Even then, he could not fight his way out of a sewing class. He has devolved into a pitiful lump.

About a month later, he gets his second DUI. Then another. Is fired from his job with railroad. Within two weeks he gets a 4th, driving with a revoked license. He tossed in jail. His estranged wife refuses to bail him out. Family refuses as well. Wife moved back in, gets a restraining order. Husband is sentenced to 12 months minimum. Meanwhile, divorce is settled and wife gets the house, sells house, moves to Atlanta. New start for her. Hell on earth for him.
My regards,

Widewing

YGBSM. Retired Member of Aces High Trainer Corps, Past President of the DFC, retired from flying as Tredlite.

Offline Oldman731

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Re: Ghetto humor
« Reply #3 on: September 04, 2023, 09:50:01 PM »
About 15 years ago, my next door neighbor had his sweet wife leave him. He would drink excessively and become physically abusive. After she left him, he drank even more. One Sunday evening, my daughter wakes me to complain about the neighbor's loud music blasting. He must have come home drunk and decided to blast music. He didn't answer his phone. So, I dressed and walked over to his house. I pounded on the door to no response. I looked in a window to find him passed out on his sofa, beer cans covered his coffee table. I checked and found his garage door unlocked. I opened the door, went to the circuit breaker panel and threw the main breaker. I waited about 10 seconds and flipped it back on. Lights on, stereo off. Good. Back home to bed. The following evening, I had a conversation with the numbskull. Told him next time, I'll call the police and they will break down the door to check on him and turn off music. He thinks he's a tough guy when drunk. Even then, he could not fight his way out of a sewing class. He has devolved into a pitiful lump.

About a month later, he gets his second DUI. Then another. Is fired from his job with railroad. Within two weeks he gets a 4th, driving with a revoked license. He tossed in jail. His estranged wife refuses to bail him out. Family refuses as well. Wife moved back in, gets a restraining order. Husband is sentenced to 12 months minimum. Meanwhile, divorce is settled and wife gets the house, sells house, moves to Atlanta. New start for her. Hell on earth for him.


WW, reading this, in this titled thread, one might postulate that you are humor-challenged.

Nice story, though.

- oldman