Hah, Maverick, I'll remember that dad joke, I have a relative who is an installer with the local ISP here and always works with fiber. I'll teach it to his kids, hah.
Every day I'm Shu-ffu-ler (LMFAO Party Rock in case others don't get it, as I haven't gotten to call you that in years) - congrats on your new connection. My uncle lives next door to my lake cabin home where it's pretty remote, and they just ran fiber out to it in late 2024, even though it's in the middle of nowhere. He had pretty much the same reaction you did when they first switched it over from the crappy wireless he's been using (me too out there). Price is lower, speed/service/reliability is a massive improvement too he's told me.
The lodge there is rented out constantly for conferences and such so the ownership board plunked down the $ to have a line run out to the campground, so now all the permanent residents who have homes there at the facility can benefit from getting in on the sweet fiber action. I might get it there myself for the summer time I'm going to be spending there, so I'm looking forward to not being stuck with the crap wireless as in past years.
https://flexnetworks.ca/arlington-beach/ . I've got 2 days to decide and still get in on their deal.
I've had it for 5 or 6 years now in the city, it's only 1mbit up/down synchro, but they are planning shortly to increase the max plans to 2.5. 1 is honestly been enough and great, but faster is always better.