Author Topic: To Be a Republican...  (Read 976 times)

Offline AKcurly

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To Be a Republican...
« on: August 02, 2004, 11:17:17 PM »
Yup, pretty well sums it up.
curly
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1. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

2. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

3. Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.

4. "Standing Tall for America'" means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India.

5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

6. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

7. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

8. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday run for governor of California as a Republican,

9. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

10. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

11. HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

12. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

13. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

14. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

15. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

16. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

17. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

18. You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have a right to adopt.

19. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

20. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.

Offline Bodhi

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To Be a Republican...
« Reply #1 on: August 02, 2004, 11:19:38 PM »
lotsa bullchit in this...

Gonna hook a lot of fish with this crap... sad... the fishing here has gotten too easy... :rolleyes:

Nice cut and paste... you get that from 1800 Kerry sux special interest dik?
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Offline B17Skull12

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To Be a Republican...
« Reply #2 on: August 02, 2004, 11:21:44 PM »
ahem you're ghey

you deserve a :aok ghey smiley.

Congrats.
II/JG3 DGS II

Offline Shuckins

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To Be a Republican...
« Reply #3 on: August 02, 2004, 11:22:35 PM »
"...through a glass and darkly..."

Offline NUKE

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« Reply #4 on: August 02, 2004, 11:24:38 PM »
LOL!

Sad thing is that he probably believes that garbage.

Offline AKcurly

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To Be a Republican...
« Reply #5 on: August 02, 2004, 11:26:26 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by NUKE
LOL!

Sad thing is that he probably believes that garbage.


Lol, well pick one out and take a whack, Nuke. :)

curly

Offline rpm

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« Reply #6 on: August 02, 2004, 11:27:29 PM »
Nicely done Curly. You hit the nail squarely on the head. Are you going to be kicked out of the AK's now?
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Offline NUKE

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« Reply #7 on: August 02, 2004, 11:28:33 PM »
Quote
Originally posted by AKcurly
Lol, well pick one out and take a whack, Nuke. :)

curly


are you serious? My god, it's too easy.

Offline hawker238

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To Be a Republican...
« Reply #8 on: August 02, 2004, 11:29:39 PM »
Oh no!  Political humor!  I must take offense!

:rolleyes:



My favorites:

6. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

9. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.



They'll probably attack #1.  Good luck curly!

Offline Saurdaukar

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To Be a Republican...
« Reply #9 on: August 02, 2004, 11:41:01 PM »
Jesus doesnt hate Hillary, of course.  Thats not very Christian.

She is mentioned with slight pity, although I think they refer to her as Lucifer or some such pen name.

Offline hawker238

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« Reply #10 on: August 02, 2004, 11:52:32 PM »
:rofl:

You're pretty funny, Saur.  Change your avatar back to a woman in tight pants and you'll probably the most popular person here.

Offline NUKE

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Re: To Be a Republican...
« Reply #11 on: August 03, 2004, 12:00:22 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by AKcurly
Yup, pretty well sums it up.
curly
----------
1. Being a drug addict is a moral failing and a crime, unless you're a conservative radio host. Then it's an illness and you need our prayers for your recovery.

2. The United States should get out of the United Nations, and our highest national priority is enforcing U.N. resolutions against Iraq.

3. Government should relax regulation of Big Business and Big Money but crack down on individuals who use marijuana to relieve the pain of illness.

4. "Standing Tall for America'" means firing your workers and moving their jobs to India.

5. A woman can't be trusted with decisions about her own body, but multi-national corporations can make decisions affecting all mankind without regulation.

6. Jesus loves you, and shares your hatred of homosexuals and Hillary Clinton.

7. The best way to improve military morale is to praise the troops in speeches while slashing veterans' benefits and combat pay.

8. Group sex and drug use are degenerate sins unless you someday run for governor of California as a Republican,

9. If condoms are kept out of schools, adolescents won't have sex.

10. A good way to fight terrorism is to belittle our long-time allies, then demand their cooperation and money.

11. HMOs and insurance companies have the best interests of the public at heart.

12. Providing health care to all Iraqis is sound policy. Providing health care to all Americans is socialism.

13. Global warming and tobacco's link to cancer are junk science, but creationism should be taught in schools.

14. Saddam was a good guy when Reagan armed him, a bad guy when Bush's daddy made war on him, a good guy when Cheney did business with him and a bad guy when Bush needed a "we can't find Bin Laden" diversion.

15. A president lying about an extramarital affair is an impeachable offense. A president lying to enlist support for a war in which thousands die is solid defense policy.

16. Government should limit itself to the powers named in the Constitution, which include banning gay marriages and censoring the Internet.

17. The public has a right to know about Hillary's cattle trades, but George Bush's driving record is none of our business.

18. You support states' rights, which means Attorney General John Ashcroft can tell states what local voter initiatives they have a right to adopt.

19. What Bill Clinton did in the 1960s is of vital national interest, but what Bush did in the '80s is irrelevant.

20. Trade with Cuba is wrong because the country is communist, but trade with China and Vietnam is vital to a spirit of international harmony.


here is my original rebutal to each one, using the retarded  and flawed logic of the original

1.  Being a drug addict is fine if you are a liberal and /or Hollywood star. Using drugs is not a crime unless you are a conservative talkshow host

2. The United States should increase it's dependance on the UN, giving highest priority to the UN's idea of not enforcing any resolution

3. what the hell does one have to do with the other? Gay!

4. Standing Tall for America means letting Koffi Anan run our foreign policy

5. A woman should be allowed to murder her fetus because a fetus is not a life, unless of course someone kills that fetus against the mother's wishes, in which case it is suddenly considered a life.

6. Jesus loves everyone, including the liberals who hate traditional families.

7. The Best way to improve troop moral is to call them all war criminals when they are sent to war.

8. Group sex and drug use are considered okay by liberals, unless you are a Republican running for Governer.

9. Schools need to decide family matters, not the parents.

10. A good way to fight terrorism is to fight terrorists, despite what the French and Germans say

11. The government always knows what's best for you

12. When did we start providing healthcare for all Iraqis?

13. What does the fact that tobbaco causes cancer have to do with the myth of global warming? What does religion have to do with either?

14 Saddam is still a good guy today, by Liberal standards.

15. A president (Clinton) lying under oath was impeached, end of story.

........to bored to go on.......

Offline AKcurly

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Re: Re: To Be a Republican...
« Reply #12 on: August 03, 2004, 12:27:00 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by NUKE
here is my original rebutal to each one, using the retarded  and flawed logic of the original

1.  Being a drug addict is fine if you are a liberal and /or Hollywood star. Using drugs is not a crime unless you are a conservative talkshow host

Hmm, I believe we're talking about Rush, eh?  He's the guy who said dopers should be executed.  And of course, at one time, most of you were in Rush's amen corner.  Since there's just a puddle of pee in said corner, most of you have tall rubber boots on now.

Quote
2. The United States should increase it's dependance on the UN, giving highest priority to the UN's idea of not enforcing any resolution
[/b]

Nuke, did you have trouble understanding the point?  It's about conflicting behavior.  Many conservatives want us out of the UN and many of them scream the loudest about what it should it do.

Quote
3. what the hell does one have to do with the other? Gay!
[/b]

It clearly illustrates the inability of the current government to determine reasonable goals.  Just how important is it to arrest John Q. Public for 2 grams of mj and yet fail to restrain John Q. Corporation from gross public abuses.

Quote
4. Standing Tall for America means letting Koffi Anan run our foreign policy
[/b]

Well, I'm sure the folks who lost their jobs feel the same way, Nuke.

Quote
5. A woman should be allowed to murder her fetus because a fetus is not a life, unless of course someone kills that fetus against the mother's wishes, in which case it is suddenly considered a life.
[/b]

No point in arguing about what you said, but you missed the point.  Big surprise.  Here's the point, Nuke.  How did so much dioxin/hg/nitrates/etc get in the Chesapeake Bay?  Answer: Corporate dumping of chemicals.   So, some corporations made decisions which kill far more humans than abortions.  An abortion is a decision made by one individual about herself and her baby.  Polluting water sources (which affect everyone) was done by corporations with an eye on the bottom line and no where else.

Quote
........to bored to go on....... [/B]


Me too, Nuke.  Step back from the little airplanes, you have inhaled too much glue.  

curly

Offline NUKE

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« Reply #13 on: August 03, 2004, 12:37:14 AM »
Sorry Curly, but even if I sniffed too much glue, you could not come close to my level of  understanding.

Offline AKcurly

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« Reply #14 on: August 03, 2004, 12:48:27 AM »
Quote
Originally posted by NUKE
Sorry Curly, but even if I sniffed too much glue, you could not come close to my level of  understanding.


Ok. ;)

curly