Sharp, im really no expert, but.... heres my limited DA experience.
I got my sliders all to the top, except on pitch (the first is 1/2 inch from top, second and third are each a bit higher, from 4th on all top). Same goes for rudder, to dampen my nose bounce a bit. Deadband as far down as possible, Damping just high enough to avoid serious nose bounce. This makes for a very fine control, but needs some getting used to be 'more gentle' with that stick of yours (pun kind of intended here
).
You can try rising the sliders slowly over time. I changed them from default to all top all at once - needed a few weeks to adjust to the new 'stick feeling'. I guess by making the change step by step, you wont stall as much.
Speed/throttle management is the key to turning i think. The slower you are, the tighter youll come about. But hanging there at 40 mph when the 'other guy' is still fast isnt really fun. On merge, it depends on what the 'other guy' does and/or on the situation.
I MA i usually try to keep my Speed (E), unless i *know* its gonna be a duel-like 1 on 1. I watch and try to react to whatever the 'other guy' does.
On equal terms duel merge, i try to come about as fast as possible, ie chop throttle, get her around in oblique kind of immel (merge speed between 240 and 300 max). Flaps as soon as possible (not sure if thats a good thing though...). If i pull double immel or not again depends on what i feel would be best move now.
If you know you got seriously more E, you can try to fake an immel, hit full WEP and go for a surprise rope. Doesnt always work, but is usually fun!
This goes for Spitty flying.
In Hurr1 the world looks quite different, since you just cant afford to loose E, no matter it hurting your turn. Once youre too slow, the eng just dont have enough power to get you going again.
Another thing i noticed. It does make a big difference *who* you are fighting. Theres a lot of different styles out there which require very different counter tactics. Whith some you need to keep your E/speed, with some its just about who-can-fly-slowest. And with some you never know what you get next.
Schatzi
Edit: One more thing. 2 weeks ago i changed my stick map. I always needed to remove my hand off throttle (ie rudder!) to look up. Now i changed that. Can look up and use rudder at the same time. This made a *HUGE* difference on my flying. It got a lot smoother and i stall way less than i used to.