RPM you beat me to it...
Thrawn... LOL! The trick is to inform them that certain "age appropriate behavior" isn't appropriate as they get older, and sometimes that takes punishment. The kids that aren't taught the idea that actions have consequences are the ones that grow up to think it's ok to drug girls at parties and rape them.
Gunslinger, read RPM's post again. Then put yourself on timeout
Seriously, I don't know of a single household that feeds their kids high sugar content foods that doesn't have behavior problems with their kids. My brother even had to eliminate milk from his oldest son's diet because the sugar in the milk would set him off. Growing up as a kid, the wild kids I knew all downed a box of sugar bombs followed by a coke for breakfast.
Advice from a guy who doesn't have kids yet, but who grew up in a house with 4 kids and has had the benefit of watching my older brother's mistakes and successes with 5 kids of his own:
Breakfast = cheerios, or rice krispies, or one of those chex flavors if you don't have time, or if you do have time, low-cholesterol eggs, toast, milk, OJ. Replace the sugar with low-fat protein at breakfast. A small slice of cheese works if they don't like milk.
Any soda in the house ought to be sugar and caffine free, or at least don't combine the two, and limit the kids to one soda a day to keep from going broke. It's only flavored water anyhow.
What to do to fill the gap in their diet? Make popsicles out of real juices, OJ, apple, whatever, but still limit those to one or two a day because of the sugar. Always have a container of peeled and sliced carrot sticks in the fridge for snacking. Rice cakes now come in flavored form, so those can make good snacks. A tiny plastic bag with a few peanuts and maybe a few raisins can keep a kid entertained for an hour. Keep fresh apples and oranges around the house, and remember that if you don't prepare them, the kids won't eat them so every day peel an orange or slice an apple for them to eat.
Before dinner, to shut us up when we were hungry my Mom made us veggie plates instead of an unhealthy snack like potato chips. A couple of carrot sticks, some tomato wedges or cherry tomatos, sliced bell peppers, cucumber slices, etc. It took the edge off our hunger so we didn't drive her nuts while she was cooking dinner, and it kept us from raiding our friend's houses for fatty or sugary snacks around 4-5pm every day. It's healthy too
I've heard some people say that if it's not on the WIC approved list, they don't buy it. That's gotta get boring after a while, but maybe it helps them avoid the crap on the shelves.
I'm not saying we didn't have behavioral problems in our house (hehe), but I honestly don't recall a single incident like you just described even when my grandparents or a sitter was watching us. When the kids are spreading chocolate frosted sugar bombs around the house and pouring sugar water into the entertainment center, that's about as loud of a warning sign as you'll get.
BTW, what did you do to that poor viper? Sucks to hear about your award submission getting pulled. I hate to see it but everyone in the force is so on-edge that single incidents seem to get blown way out of proportion nowadays. I have 3 NCOs working for me right now and I really hope I don't overreact like that. As painful as it is to write awards packages, I'd rather do that than holler and shout anyday.
