If you want "more realistic" combat, join the SEA or AvsA..... snapshops, FSOs, escort.... pretty even matches, and a nice change of pace from MA.
For me, I'm not a great fighter pilot, much better in a buff... but when flying fighters in MA I pick the tool for the job.
On defense: ack is still up, VH spewing little GV's all over, I'll grab a Yak or Kia-84 and defend the airfield up close. Try to draw the vulchers in for me or my little GV buddies to swat, and generally try to keep the runway clear for lifters. (That's If I'm not dropping field supplies or gunning my quad-50 against vulchers).
If ack and VH flat, lot's of DeeFire Mark-16's buzzing overhead, heck yes I'll grab an La-5 or La7.... preferable from another close field... and B&Z them..... Maybe a Typhie, if enemy GV's also a problem. Or a Temp if price right and enough fellow defenders in area.
Hunting sub-orbital buffs (and I'm one often enough myself), used to be Ta-152, but the radiator in it is as vulnerable as a Typhies, so I'll try to get a Jug up there if there is time. Bf109K-4 if I'm scrambling to get high fast. Sometimes G10 or G2 with gondolas if I need cannon.
Escorting buffs.... Pony or Jug. JABO flight and vulching, Pony or Typhie.
I'm very rarely in Spits or the navy planes. German planes I take for interceptor roll. I almost never fly Hurries (or Lancs for the matter).
Having fun in a furball, C205 sometimes.
Fly what you want, where you want. Not having fun, move elsewhere or try something different.