"SEXTING" PLEASE READ PARENTS

[Raygun]

I run a keylogger, I know every keystroke my 14 yr old daughter makes on the computer. I know every single website she goes to. I know who she emails.

I use this one: (except I paid for the more comprehensive version)

http://www.download.com/Free-KGB-Key-Logger/3000-2162_4-10357898.html

I busted her one time after she had googled for *naked boys*. She tried to deny it until I showed her the evidence, date...time.....screen shot....

She knows I use some sort of software to keep track of her activities but has no idea what it is or how to access it. We haven't had a single problem since.

You're going to have a mighty big shock when she gets into high-school. I hope you don't freak out about the thoughts of testorone-crazed teenaged boys going after your daughter, because it's going to happen...soon.

[trigger2]

This is what im getting at, In my highschool there was a guy that sold weed, prepacked in apples that he had fassioned into pipes, out the back of his car during lunch time like he was a vendor at a fair, street racing is much more illegal and far more dangerous, there were places on campus that you couldnt go at lunchtime with out seeing some kids having sex, so frankly having your some nice little girl having phone sex through texting with her boyfrined is the least of your worries as a parent.

+1, the problem these days, at least imo, is OVER protection, if you think about it, reverse psychology works better than telling someone to do something (especially kids. ), so tell them, "No, you cannot have sex, so I'm not gonna tell you about it" just leads to uneducated kids having sex.

[Enker]

This is what im getting at, In my highschool there was a guy that sold weed, prepacked in apples that he had fassioned into pipes, out the back of his car during lunch time like he was a vendor at a fair, street racing is much more illegal and far more dangerous, there were places on campus that you couldnt go at lunchtime with out seeing some kids having sex, so frankly having your some nice little girl having phone sex through texting with her boyfrined is the least of your worries as a parent.

You must have had a messed up high school.

[Serenity]

You must have had a messed up high school.

Come to Hawaii. The biggest customers for our teenage drug dealers are campus security and the police.

[oakranger]

Im not discounting the fact that its troubling for a parent.  Im simply suggesting that it probably isnt any more 'dangerous,' all things being equal, than anything you did as a child.

Now, regardless of the laws surrounding the age of majority, I would offer to you that 35 year old women send nude cell phone pictures, too. 

In any event, I did see the story aired on CNN, I believe, and I thought it was high on sensationalism and low on meat.  If I recall correctly, some poor girl hung herself because a picture got around school?  Thats horrible... cut it didnt happen because she took a picture of herself.

About that girl that killed her self.  She took the pix of her and send it to her BF.  When they broke up, he send it to the kids at school.

[Angus]

How would 1968 have been if this technology had existed?
In any case, even more pictures from Woodstock 

[Elfie]

Are you serious???

Yup. At 14 years old she has no business looking for porn. Not in my house anyways.

However, it isn't just about making sure she isn't visiting porn sites. It's also about protecting her from sexual predators while she is online. She is very gullible and naive and it is my job as her father to not only teach her, but also to protect her.

[Elfie]

You know she just does it elsewhere, right?

Kids are curious and the anatomy of the opposite sex will be a mystery to her.

Arming her with a level head and a solid set of morals is the best defence you can have against teen sex.

Give your children knowledge, don't deprive them of it. 

Don't leave out the STDs, either. If you tell her about those, in graphic detail, you won't have to worry about her having sex, she'll be too scared of being promiscuous.

Herpes is a good one, show her some pictures of that. Don't forget the rest, either. There is some disgusting watermelon out there

Or, go to a family planning clinic. If they're anything like the one my girlfriend works at, they'll have all sorts of information on pregnancy and STDs. The booklets I've seen were quite disgusting. I bet you $50 that works better than logging her keystrokes on the computer.


Also, while I'm at it, this charging kids with 'child pornography' for receiving photos of the girlfriends naked is the most ridiculous load of BS I have seen come out of the legal system in years.

What a joke. A free act of choice involving no sexual contact at all.... being considered a crime? F- k off.

Whoever thought of that should be bludgeoned to watermelon for being a complete arse.

No she doesn't, unless she is doing it at school.

[Elfie]

By the way Elfie, I'm not trying to be disrespectful toward your chosen style of parenting.

It's just that, as I said, my girlfriend works in a family planning clinic and she sees too many 13-16 year old girls in trouble. I'll be brief, here's what happens.

A girl comes in with or without her 'boyfriend':

- Neither of them know much/anything about sex and reproduction
- Nether of them know anything about STDs

A lot of the girls come in with whatever cash they can find because they wouldn't dare tell their parents about it.

Hard-line, stand-over tactics similar to the ones you stated in this thread often lead to girls ending up in situations like I just mentioned.

Should the very worst case scenario arise, do you want your kid to feel that she has to make the hardest or worst, most terrible decision in her life alone?

Just a suggestion, mate.

My older daughter, the one in question has a weight problem. (We have her on a diet and I have to make her exercise, but she does it) Because of this weight issue she has, she has never had a boyfriend and isn't likely to any time soon. So while we are concerned with the one issue, we are kinda glad we don't have to worry about her having sex just yet.

She does have a friend that is very pretty and I am darn glad I am not her father because I'd worry all the time. lol

[Elfie]

I fail to understand how teens sending self pics to other teens consitutes child porn.
Im not saying its ok. I just dont understand how a teen gets charged for child porn for taking pics of themselves and passing it onto other teens.
Just seems downright silly.


Elfie
"I busted her one time after she had googled for *naked boys*. She tried to deny it until I showed her the evidence, date...time.....screen shot....

She knows I use some sort of software to keep track of her activities but has no idea what it is or how to access it. We haven't had a single problem since"

So you busted your 14 year old for acting like a normal 14 year old?

I know there is something of a double standard when it comes to girls Vs boys.  Because I have both. And there is indeed a double standard.
But I also know that regardless of sex. Around that age. Females have very much the same feelings and curiosities and participate in teh same ...ummmm "activities" shall we say as males.
I monitor/ed both my kids internet access.
I've known my son has looked at prn since he was 15. (he's going to be 21 in June) Never said a word to him. I dont plan on saying anything to my daughter (now 12 going on 13) either. So long as the activity doesnt become obsessive.

Your kid, so its ultimately your call. But Im not sure of the wisdom behind busting a teens chops for looking as it will probably only serve to drive this activity underground.
Teens of both sexes look. You looked. I looked. We all either do or have looked. Especially around that age. And if they arent or cant feel safe looking at home. Then they will be looking at a friends house. Its a loosing battle.
and if you havent been through having a teenage kid untill now.

Keep in mind that your best picking and choosing your battles. LOL

I personally have opted on stressing the consequences of real life interaction. Disease, pregnancy, etc

The largest danger here was she googled "naked boys" (assuming that discription was accurate. As that could get YOU in trouble for child porn.
THAT point I might have stressed.
But then again that may be just what your concern was.

You are clueless.

[OOZ662]

You are clueless.

I apologize for pointing it out, but you do seem to be the minority in this thread. This statement might not be very fitting.

[Elfie]

I apologize for pointing it out, but you do seem to be the minority in this thread. This statement might not be very fitting.

He is clueless because he does not know me or my daughter and is only making assumptions.

[Cougar68]

Having the logger on the computer is no different than a parent looking through clothes drawers of their child.  Happened all the time when I was growing up.  It's a child's job to push the boundaries he/she is given, and it's a parent's job to set safe boundaries and keep an eye on them while they push.  If your boundaries are loose, when they push they can really get into trouble.  I keep realistic restrictions on my son and absolutely expect him to break them every now and then.  I don't always let him know when I catch him, but if he starts getting a little too far out, I'll reign him in.

[Xasthur]

Yup. At 14 years old she has no business looking for porn. Not in my house anyways.

Out of curiosity, when does she have the right to look at porn?

15? 16? 17? 18? 21?

If she's not sexually active, she's just curious. It's not like she's getting on the internet for 'tips and tricks'.

Curiosity is normal and healthy.

[Xasthur]

You said she was looking for 'Naked boys'.... she probably doesn't know what a wang looks like when it's ready for business.

If she was looking for something more graphic than 'naked boys' I might get where you're coming from.