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Author Topic: Help with a Depression Victim.  (Read 1412 times)

Offline Oogly50

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Help with a Depression Victim.
« on: August 25, 2009, 10:26:41 PM »
I'd like to just throw it out there now, I am smart enough to know that no matter what I say will be able to help the following person out of their depression, but I want to know how I can help them, and hopefully get them through this.


Alright, so I met this girl a few days ago.  She seemed nice and cheerful.  Not a care in the world.  Then tonight, she tells me she hints at me that she is depressed... I figured "Hey, its a girl thing," and then shrugged it away.  Then she told me what she's never told anyone else before.  She's been depressed for a couple of years now, and has attempted suicide multiple times. 
I've been trying to talk her through this, getting as much out of her as I can, and trying to offer up advice and what I think she should try and do, but I can't get through to her.  She either doesn't care, or replies sarcastically and doesn't take me seriously. 

I know I can't do much to help, but I'm trying anyway... and so now I come to people who could probably know more about this than me.

"you dont diddlying know the toejam i have been thorouh. diddlying getting abused til you were 11 because you weren't some guys biological kid. getting molested by someone you looked up too and thought you could trust and getting diddlying heart broken and moving 10 times in 2 years.
it diddlying sucks do dont tell me its going to be okay because its not.
never has been and never will be."

To which I replied:
I can't say it will be
because I honestly don't know
but you don't know it will be bad, nobody can predict the future


So then I told her that I really think she should seek help, possibly her mom, as she is the root to at least half of her problems, but this girl won't listen and refuses to talk to anyone or see anyone.

What should I do? 
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Offline Bodhi

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #1 on: August 25, 2009, 10:30:50 PM »
She needs a good shrink.  Not medicine, but someone to talk it out with.
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Offline Roscoroo

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #2 on: August 25, 2009, 10:31:21 PM »
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Offline gyrene81

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #3 on: August 25, 2009, 10:38:50 PM »
Definitely professional help time...and a desire/reason to try...not gonna happen easily and you're gonna get hurt in the process.

Been there, done that, own the franchise.

Quote from: Roscoroo on August 25, 2009, 10:31:21 PM
RUN
Best advice here.
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Offline detch01

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #4 on: August 25, 2009, 10:39:20 PM »
As harsh as this may sound...
  This girls is in need of help you are not capable of giving her. Give her a last push towards professional help, call the authorities if you think she's suicidal, but then walk away and stay away. There just are no other options with any chance of success for her or you.



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Offline Reschke

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #5 on: August 25, 2009, 10:39:54 PM »
Quote from: Oogly50 on August 25, 2009, 10:26:41 PM
What should I do? 

As Cuba Gooding Jr told Tom Cruise in Jerry McGuire...."don't shoplift the pootie!"

This chick may not be a single mom but the rule still applies here. She is not someone that I would be willing to have more than a friendship with until this other stuff gets worked out...even then it might never be something that I would personally do. Be a friend and try to help but DON'T SHOPLIFT THE POOTIE!
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Offline Oogly50

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #6 on: August 25, 2009, 10:40:30 PM »
But how can I get her some professional help if she refuses to take it.  Her mom refuses to believe that she NEEDS help, thinking everything is just fine and dandy.  

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Offline gyrene81

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #7 on: August 25, 2009, 10:41:47 PM »
Quote from: Oogly50 on August 25, 2009, 10:40:30 PM
But how can I get her some professional help if she refuses to take it.  Her mom refuses to believe that she NEEDS help, thinking everything is just fine and dandy.  

If you think she is in danger of hurting herself...make the call yourself...then
Quote from: Roscoroo on August 25, 2009, 10:31:21 PM
RUN
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Offline oakranger

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #8 on: August 25, 2009, 10:44:57 PM »
Quote from: Oogly50 on August 25, 2009, 10:40:30 PM
But how can I get her some professional help if she refuses to take it.  Her mom refuses to believe that she NEEDS help, thinking everything is just fine and dandy.  



You can't tell people to go seek help.  This is a tought situation that is hard to deal with.  The best advices i would do is contact a theripist and ask them what you can do.  They should know a simple "go tell her to seek help" will not work.
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Offline Oogly50

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #9 on: August 25, 2009, 10:46:08 PM »
I told her that I thought she needed help. 

She told me that if I told anybody (that includes therapists) that she would stab herself. 

Now what? 
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Offline Spikes

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #10 on: August 25, 2009, 10:50:33 PM »
Women and emotions..,Oogly...is she bipolar or does she have some type of disorder?
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Offline Oogly50

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #11 on: August 25, 2009, 10:51:17 PM »
Quote from: Spikes on August 25, 2009, 10:50:33 PM
Women and emotions..,Oogly...is she bipolar or does she have some type of disorder?

I guess you could call it severe depression. 
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Offline detch01

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #12 on: August 25, 2009, 10:53:09 PM »
Quote from: Oogly50 on August 25, 2009, 10:46:08 PM
I told her that I thought she needed help. 

She told me that if I told anybody (that includes therapists) that she would stab herself. 

Now what? 
Phone the police and tell them. If I were you I'd be on the phone to the police and reporting her suicide threat (just in case she is going sideways and this isn't just emotional blackmail) and then cutting any and all communication with her.
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Offline gyrene81

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #13 on: August 25, 2009, 10:54:17 PM »
Quote from: Spikes on August 25, 2009, 10:50:33 PM
Women and emotions..,Oogly...is she bipolar or does she have some type of disorder?
Spikes read his first post very carefully...it's not a physiological disorder...  :eek:
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Offline Oogly50

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Re: Help with a Depression Victim.
« Reply #14 on: August 25, 2009, 10:56:24 PM »
So, let's say I call the police and report a suicide threat. Will they get her help from there? That is all I want for her...
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There was once a saying that goes "If you put an infinite amount of monkeys in a room with an infinite amount of typewriters, eventually they will produce something worth reading."

The internet has proved this wrong.
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